Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Wednesday, May 31, 2017

My last test tomorrow and one year done at university!

Hello and good evening everyone :)

It's almost 7pm here in Sweden and today has passed incredibly quickly and if im honest im not ready for tomorrow..... Tomorrow i have my last test (which is actually 2 tests in one = extra long time to complete) and then im done for university for this semester as i have already sent in my other written paper/report! Its crazy that i have now done one year of university in Gothenburg and 1,5 years of university in total! And before i know it i will have lived a year in Gothenburg.

Sometimes i smile over the fact that i was so stubborn about the fact that i would move to Gothenburg and study here... i remember summer 2015 was the first time i said i would move and live in this city. So decided and stubborn even if it took me more than a year to actually complete that goal and it didnt turn out the way i had thought or planned. I had initally wanted to study the dietician program which is a 4 year program but now i study another similar program but is alot more open and more about health promotion rather than working with sick people. I've worried about my choice of program, worried that i wont end up with a job in the career i want, worried about where i will end up but i know i am on the right path and i know that my dreams now will change and what i think i will work with will most likely change in 5-10 years time. But right now i feel i am on the right path.

My time at university this time round is so much better than my first experience. I have friends, i am social, i enjoy the university classes and enjoy learning even if some courses and lectures i have questioned how helpful they are to me.  I have fallen in love with Gothenburg even if i know i wont live here forever because it is far too small for me, but i do love living here. Its been a whole lot of drama and moving around the past 6 months but ive now found a place i love living and amazing room mates. I have work i enjoy and a bunch of different gyms i love going to. I feel like life is going up and can only get better and even if i have fears and worries and question my choices at times i know i am on the right path for now!

1 year of my 3 year program completed and so much more knowledge. Some of the courses were just repetition but i still have so much more knowledge. Ive realised that some areas interest me more than others... i know i want to work with people directly and not with research. Sustainability is a huge topic i love learning more about and a sustainable diet. I want to work with healthy people and motivated people, but also help motivate those who arent to make a difference in their diet and lifestyle. I dont think i want to work with sick people who i have to force them to make a change, instead i want to motivate and inspire people and work with those who are willing to make a change and want to become healthy... doesnt matter if they have an illness, as long as they are motivated to want to make a change. Because one thing that irritates me alot is when i give sick people advice but they are too sick to follow the advice... then it just feels like a waste of energy for me. So for example if you do have an eating disorder but are motivated to follow a meal plan, motivated to become healthy then i am much more willing to work with you rather than someone who would be forced to come for me for nutrition advice and forced to follow a meal plan but all they do is hide the food, purge and do their best to avoid eating.... even if its due to the illness, its hard to work with those patients. Please dont take this personally, but this is just my opinion right now!

I'm excited for the summer. Excited for the sun and warmth, excited for watermelon and strawberries and runs in shorts outside. But im also excited to work, excited to meet friends, excited for barbeques and whatever else i may do this summer. Who knows maybe i just work 80% of the time, but whatever my summer may bring i am ready for it!!!


  1. :))
    I LOVE this post!! :))
    So, so glad you are happy and flourishing and enjoying your path in life. :)

  2. It just doesn't seem possible that a year has gone by already, it seems like only recently you were just starting at uni! I am so pleased for you that it has been an enjoyable experience and that life is looking really good for you right now :)
    I hope you have a really great summer doing everything you want to do! Now is the time to have fun, and re-charge your energies ready for when term starts up again. Do you plan to stay in Gothenberg for the whole summer or are you going back home to your family?
    Have fun and enjoy the sunshine!

  3. Congratulations, that's so awesome! :)

    I have a question I would be so thankful if you answered.
    I have a mealplan for 2500 calories which I'm not sure when I should start to cut down on or if the body ever just maintain a normal weight without gaining on this mealplan and I instead of cutting down, should keep following the mealplan until it does? Every recommendation for a girl in my age is 2000-2200 so I have hard to believe I could continue eating 2500 without gaining...

    Thanks a lot!

    1. You could stop having "extra" things you took to gain weight such fruit juice/milk with meals but when you are weight restored and ready to come off your meal plan you can begin to eat intuitively which means your appetite will natuarally vary from day to day so I shouldn't have thought weight gain will be a problem. Also give your body time to reach its set point.

  4. Hi Izzy - I have just found out that I have to go into hospital soon for an operation and I am getting really worried about how I`m going to manage my eating whilst I`m in there. I`m going to be in there for at least a week, maybe a little longer. Do you think I should tell them I am following a recovery meal plan? I`m worried about things like having my snacks and what the menus will be like. Should I take my supplement drinks in with me? I`m also worried that the operation itself and how I feel afterwards is going to negatively affect my eating - I mean when I get ill my appetite completely disappears so I am guessing I won`t feel much like eating for the first few days and I don`t want this to set me back. Do you think its best/easier just to forget my meal plan whilst I`m in there and just to eat what I want from the menus or should I tell them what I`m doing and see if they can accommodate it, which I`m thinking is unlikely as it just won`t be practical for the staff. From past experience the menu for the next days meals is given out the day before and you just choose from the options what you want, I remember there being things marked gluten free/vegetarian option/low sugar/low calorie options but not anything like options for those needing to gain weight, and I am worried about portion sizes too - they are tiny!
    If you have any advice about how I should manage this I would be so grateful.

  5. Do you know what courses you will be studying in the coming year or do you have the option to choose what you want to study, ie "specialise" on a certain subject?