Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Saturday, April 22, 2017

Being told that you are "good" for exercising

This post will be a sort of rant post with some thoughts i need to get out of my mind.

Ive grown up with a family where exercising is just part of daily life and a normal habit we all have. All my life ive done regular exercise in some form or another and its just the way i've been brought up. Ive never been complimented or told that i am "good" for exercising, instead just been encouraged to keep it up and bee.n reminded that its healthy for me.

Not even when i was sick was exercise something i did because i thought i was being "good" or "perfect". Instead it was just something i loved that soon become an obsession and somehing i did just to burn calories and to compensate, but never because i felt "good" or thought i was being good, it was just a way to ease anxiety and to feel a little bit ok with actually eating.

At the moment i also go a program where my friends all exercise in some form or another, some more serious than others and we all have different goals with our workouts but it is a regular thing for most of us. If we start lectures at 9am and some have already worked out before class they arent praised for it or told that they are good because we all workout in some form. Just like when we finish school at 10am or 12pm somedays and we all head off to our different gyms its just something we do and nothing strange about it. HOWEVER i do go a nutrition/health program so i know i am surrounded by people who have the same interests as me and if i went a different program then im sure i would be seen as strange or would be praised for my 7am workouts as that is something most normal people dont do.

But what i wanted to get to is that for me exercising regularly is normal for me its a part of my daily life and exercising doesnt just mean gym sessions, its also going for walks, running, stretching etc

I often find though that i get praised from "outside" people for working out.... and believe it or not, i dont like being praised for it. Sure if i do something incredible or lift a new heavy weight or run a long distance then a little praise doesnt hurt but as i exercise for health, happiness and therapy its not something i need to be praised for.

I know that some people like that praise, they get encouragement and motivation from it - i understand that! But i also dont think that exercise should be seen as something extra special or strange.... i think it should just be a normal thing for people. That going to the gym, going for walks, going for a run, going to a sport or any form of exercise is just normal.

It is so hard to formulate myself because this is just MY OPINION and from my own perspective. I know some people like praise.... i mean for example if i painted everyday and painting was my hobby im sure i would like some praise about my art every now and again. But i get a little irritated over that exercise is seen as something good, when it should just be seen as something normal... though i know that isnt the case.

And before i end this post, i guess i should also say that as mentioned in the beginning ive grown up with a family where exercising is normal and something ive always done, so for me its not strange to workout daily and move my body. .For others that is very strange and anyone who works out more than 2 times a week is seen as sick... according to some people who email me. But its important to remember that everyone is different and a healthy/balanced amount to exercise is different for everyone. I no longer write about my workouts on here as it seemed far too triggering for people and readers were far too quick to judge and send me messages, but also it just isnt necessary to write on here. This is a recovery blog and if you have an exercise addiction its hard to read about others exercising and i understand that, but also i feel no need to write about my exercise as its something i do for myself and it makes me happy and nothing i need to share online anyway.

Moving on... this was just some thoughts i needed to write out. Ive spent the day writing an essay so this isnt formulated very well as i am far too tired to think straight.

But maybe you have some thoughts about this topic... do you see exercise as something "good" and something you get praise over or want to get praised for doing?


  1. I get exercise guilt .. like I've always been quite an active person in the sense I go on walks every day but I struggle with feeling a failure because I don't do hardcore workouts like the only thing I go to the gym for is a yogalates class...

    1. If you feel guilty for not working out or like your workout wasnt good enough then you need to work on that guilt and your realtionship with exercise. You arent "good" for working out or going to the gym, instead exercise is a part of a healthy life - if you do it in a balanced way. I have a post about "feeling like your workout wasnt good enough" which might be helpful:

      But get rid of the thought that exercising makes you 'good' and instead realise that exercise can be something fun and healthy and you arent bad for resting or not working out.

  2. I Highly agree with you!! I exercise for several reasons but mainly for my enjoyment. The other being my health (i am quite literally forced to do it by my doctors :p) but i genuinely love exercise. It's always been this way ever since i was little. Even though my parents always told me exercise is something stupid and nnot fun at all. Which is so weird. I mean wtf? I find it alo weird that paople often tell me how great i am for eating healthy meals. I do snack and eat unhealthy daily but over all i eat very balanced and healthy. Eat a shit ton of veg, fruit, legumes etc. And i find that very normal to do so. I mean imo that's FOOD and exercise is a very normal part of LIFE. It's so weird that western society has become in the mindset of: no exercise and junkfood is normal - healthy eating and exercise is for aliens. hahaha.

    1. Oh yes i am the exact same - we are so similar, haha. I literally have to exercise as well because of my CF, im just thankful that i like to exercise i have contact with some other patients with CF who hate exercise and quite literally have to force themselves to do it because without CF health declines. So im lucky in that sense and that is one of the things that keeps me healthy!
      But also with the healthy eating... ive grown up eating alot of whole foods, alot of lentils and beans and veggies and for me that is normal, but i know for many it isnt. But like you wrote, its so strange that junk food and no exercise is seen as "standard" and anyone who does exercise or eats healthy is seen as strange... but then of course its important to be aware that overly healthy intake or too much exercise can be unhealthy. Its all kind of complicated but i wish it was just standard that whole foods and regular exercise was normal, haha.

    2. Yes of course to much isn't very healthy but then again in the eyes of many people i do 'too much' just because i exercise twice a day most days. As i do strength or cardio (or combined) and always go for a long-ish (1-2 hours) dog walk. This is normal to me and i don't force myself to do it. If i don't want or can't i don't make a big dig out of it. And still eat a lot every day of course too. That's the difference with how it was when i was using exercise as an unhealthy way to restrict: i didn't get in enough food at the time to fuel that exercise regime and didn't do it for enjoyment either. And yes i was raised with those kind of foods too! It's so weird for me to see people have meals without whole grains and veggies. I just don't view that as a meal more as a snack or sth you would have once in a year? hahah. Though we do order pizza every week ;)

    3. Oh, I recognise myself in almost every sentences you've written. I was vegetarian when I was a child because my parents were that. But then the kindergarten thought it was difficult so I needed to eat all food. But at home we continued eat a lot of vegetarian food mixed with meat sometime. We have always eat balanced food, likely something sweet almost every day, or a couple of times a week and some time in a year junk food, but mostly vegetarian based food. And I have kept that habit with a balanced diet and I still eat 5 times a day as I did when I was a child...
      Right now I'm struggling with an eating disorder so I have food I don't manage me to eat but I longing for the future when I can eat what ever again and go back to the ground of balanced eating I was raised with.
      As I wrote here under about exercising I think a lot of people think we are weird because we eat healthy food because we enjoy it and like the taste of it and not because we are forced to it.

  3. Tack Izzy! Jag är också uppväxt med att röra på mig. Det har aldrig varit ett måste eller någonting konstigt, utan vi har rört på oss. Sprungit/joggat, cyklat längre sträckor, gått promenader, gått på pass, hinderbanor ute etc. Senare utvecklade jag ett träningsberoende för att förbränna och kompensera som en del i min ätstörning. Men jag märker på många att de inte alls har liknande rörelsemönster som jag och min bror har. För oss är det naturligt och ngt vi bara gör och som vi gillar - all form av träning/motion/rörelse - varje dag. Men det är enkelt för andra att dels tala om hur duktig man är men också tala om att man gör för mkt. Ibland vågar jag inte säga till ngn att jag kan känna i hela kroppen att den vill röra på sig tex tidigt på morgonen för då tycker ngn att man är knäpp, duktig eller vill få en att känna att det inte är ok.

    Kul att läsa att vi är fler som har det med oss och där det är en naturlig del i ens liv.

  4. Its kind of sad that so many people don't exercise and work out regularly. Your so right, exercise is something that everyone should do and the fact that people consider you to be 'good' for doing it shows just how messed up the norms in todays society are.

  5. The truth is that far too many of us just don`t do enough exercise to keep ourselves fit and healthy. So much so that the Government and dept of health have issued guidelines of what we should be doing each day/week and hardly a day goes by when there is not something in the paper about what we should be doing and why it is beneficial to us.
    I believe that we should be active, that it should be seen as normal and not an oddity. Children should be taught at school the benefits of exercise and have the opportunity to take part in activities that are fun as well as healthy. That way they will grow up regarding exercise as normal and not a chore, and hopefully develop a healthy attitude towards it.
    Can I just say though that its a shame that you feel you can`t write about your exercise on here now, I enjoyed those posts, particularly those where you went on organised running events but I guess I understand your reasons why.

  6. I totally relate to this post! When I told my co-workers, that I am getting up at 6 to exercise all started to say how extraordinary I was, because it requires a lof of discipline to be so consistent. However, I don't get I why people made such a great deal when someone is having an active lifestyle. Also what bothers me is that many people are wondering how can I wake up at 6 or 7 and go to bed at 21.00 or 22.00 on a daily basis. Like, having a normal sleeping pattern is strange in our society, and it sound more normal to spend your night in front of the computer and wake up at 15.00! Of course when you go to a party, celebrate New Eve etc. you break your routine and it is pretty normal, but using the weekends to sleep the whole days, because you are tired of not having enough sleep during the week because of bad sleeping routine is kind of funny to me, but people do it all the time. However back to exercise, I sometimes have the feeling, that there is a stigma towards exercising (not talking when they are eating disorder related), but I have many friends, who say, I prefer to eat less rather than go to the gym. Like excersing is not only about loosing or maintaing your weight, is about health in general, isn't it?