Life without Anorexia
My motto is 'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'
My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.
I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.
I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!
If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: email@example.com
Tuesday, March 21, 2017
Apologizing for how you look
I am the quiet one who does alot of analyzing and i love analyzing people and their behaviour. I could definitely be someone who just sits and analyzes people and then writes texts about it as i find it fascinating to hear how people think, behave and talk. I am not much for reality tv programs however some programs i do like watching and that is just because i like analyzing how the people behave and how they act in different scenarios... it is all very fascinating for me.
One of the recent things i have been analyzing in youtube videos is how people apologize for how they look. I recently made the post "stop apologizing for who you are" and also "how we talk about food" post... and now its a post about how ive noticed people talk about their bodies and apologize for their bodies.
Such as when people do "Physique updates" on their youtube and they start off by saying "Im sorry i look so bloated im on my period" or "i ate alot yesterday" or "i drank alot of water and ate alot of carbs yesterday so i am very bloated" or "its bad angles and lighting - i look so pale". And so many other ways that the people almost apologize for how they look... like they need to justify why they might be bloated or why they are retaining water... or just plain simple why they look the way they do. Its most likely an unconscious thing and both males and females do this.
I know i can do the same thing when it comes to clothes such as "oh im sorry this has a stain on it, the rest of my clothes were in the washing basket" or "i was in a rush this morning so wearing the same jeans in 2 days in a row" or even "i did the laundry yesterday so im not wearing an old top, i cleaned it yesterday".... maybe not the same thing, but its still trying to clarify or defend what im wearing... as if you cant wear the same top or jeans 2 days in a row.
Its fascinating to hear how people talk about themselves when you just sit and listen to them. Often people say things unconsciously and they might not even be aware how they talk about themselves. I know that i personally talk very negatively about myself, for example i always say "im so bad at this, so bad at that. Not good enough at this,etc etc" never do i say "I am actually really good at X or Y." I think this has alot to do with my self condience and low self esteem, i dont believe that i am good enough or good at anything so unconsciously thats how i talk about myself as well - like i am not good or good enough. However as i am aware of this behaviour i am learning to change it... for example being ok with saying "I am good at studying, i am good at school and i do get good grades" instead of just saying "im so bad at studying, i dont study, dont get good grades" when that infact isnt the truth.
Sometimes all you have to do is listen to others or listen to the way you speak about yourself and do some self reflection. Maybe you notice how family or friends talk about themselves in a negative way... or how others apologize for who they are how they look? Point it out to them if they do.
Its happened at times when im talking to my sister and she can begin saying "Im so bad at this, so bad at that, not good enough etc" and then i call her out on it and remind her that she is good at X,Y,Z and that she shouldnt let those negative thoughts or mindset take over. I highly recommend some self analysis and even analyzing others - though thats just because i love to do just that and i find it fascinating!!
What are your thoughts about this? Do you ever notice that people apologize for how they look or always come with reasons as to why they look the way they do and apologizing for it?
Picture from Christmas.
I could apologize for my hair in the picture... but im not going to do that (thats why i choose this picture) - because thats how i looked in the morning on Christmas even while trying to choose what outfit to wear. No shame in crazy hair ;)