Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Friday, March 31, 2017

7 questions to ask when feeling overwhelmed

1. Which of these tasks should I prioritise? Do what’s most important first, and the pressure will subside.
2. Would I achieve more if I got some extra sleep? If you’re too tired to work then you’re usually less productive.
3. Are other people sucking the life out of me? Are there certain individuals who’re demanding too much time?
4. Is there anything at all that I can delegate? Do I have to do it all, or do the whole thing on my own?
5. Have I taken on too much on because “I don’t let people down”, or I’m afraid of saying “no”; or do I fear the negative reactions of others?
6. Is my space full of clutter, and that’s adding to my stress? Do I need to tidy up, or just get rid of some old stuff?
7. Can I withdraw, or take time off to recharge my batteries? Do I really need a break, and need the chance to be refreshed? Would I likely perform better if I made time for self care

Friday feeling and positives of the day

Good morning everyone :)

It is currently 5.55am, Swedish time, and im sipping on my coffee and getting ready for the day, and also trying to not worry about my exam which will start in just a few hours. Surprisingly im not so worried and havent over worked myself either, though thats mostly because of anxiety and i havent had the energy to "over study"... but i feel ready for the exam. Ready to get it over with and to start my weekend!!

First up its my exam, then going present shopping with some of my friends for another friends birthday, and then i need to get some things for myself using a present card ive had saved for several months now. (Though if i know myself i most probably wont buy anything as i'll just deem it as a waste and unnecessary shopping -_- ) And then for lunch today i am finally going to try a Gardein product which is now being sold in Sweden. Its not the most economic product to buy so it feels like this will be my first and last time buying the product, but as it will be my post test, post anxiety, pre weekend lunch i thought it was worth it. Also i always feel that i HAVE TO buy new vegan products and try them!! I will update later when i have tried them!

Then this weekend its a vegan expo type of thing with different seminars and stands with just vegan products, so going to that with friends and my room mates. And then its also party time and maybe a vegan breakfast buffet, depending on how i feel Sunday morning... nothing is decided. I am pretty sure this weekend will fly by and before i know it it is Monday again and the start of a new course! 

Yesterday was actually a rather good day so i thought i would list my positives from yesterday!

- Got to pet two of the cutest dogs yesterday morning while in the elevator.

- In the afternoon i also saw the cutest golden retriever puppy and i am hoping next time i see the puppy i will have the courage to ask if i can pet him/her as well!

- Got to meet and talk with a few of my friends i havent seen in a while as we have been in different groups during the cooking classes. (Also i have this habit of doubting that people like me, but days like yesterday when you meet a friend in the streets and just stop and talk for a while and realise that the person didnt try to rush off, but actually wanted to talk to me. And the same when i sat and was studying on my own and 2 friends walked by and stopped to talk for a long time and just catch up... its kind of nice to realise that i do have friends and that the voice inside my head that says "no one likes me/i have no friends" is infact not true.

-Talked to my sister on the phone again after a week! Felt good to catch up with her again... our schedules and lives recently have meant that we havent been able to talk recently and instead just random snapchat pictures.

- Bought the new Gardein product as well as food shopping for a few days... ive felt rather uninspired towards food shopping and cooking so it felt good to just get it done!

- The simplest of dinners can be the tastiest of them all. Just green lentils and redlentils cooked with garlic and and potatoes and vegetables, and then when its all cooked together add oat cream and (of course!) peanuts and salt. Sounds strange but this is one of my favourite comfort foods and so tasty - also recommend fresh bread along with this meal but i had finished all my bread the day before.

And then a positive from this morning... despite it being early, despite having a test soon. I woke up feeling good - somewhat energized and more like  myself again. Ready to tackle the day!!! So i am going to make the best out of today and hold onto this positive feeling!

I wish you all the best for today, and feel free to share some of your positives of the day/week below!

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Random thoughts I've had

Trying to break free from my anxiety and negative and sad feelings and instead sharing some of my other random thoughts ive had over the past few days!! Feel free to share some of your random thoughts - about anything - which you've had recently!

Would I date someone who had a peanut allergy?
Recently i began thinking... would i date someone who had a peanut allergy? First off the chances of that actually happening are very slim as i eat peanuts daily so the person would most likely have an allergic reaction before getting 10m close to me, hahah. And i dont think i would be willing to give up my peanut butter or peanuts for someone... but who knows!

Would i date someone who isnt vegan?
I am very mixed about this. As long as the person isnt a eat meat and dairy 3 times a day 7 days a week type of person and is atleast accepting of my lifestyle then i would give it a chance. But so far i have not met any guys who are extreme meat eaters who are ok with a someone being a vegan, instead they have 101 arguments as to why they need meat to survive and why being vegan is wrong. But if the person is vegetarian there is more of a chance that our lifestyles and thoughts would match... i mean its not just my diet. But its my beliefs as well - just like with politics, it can be hard to be together with someone who has the complete opposite political views as you do. So its not so much whether we eat the same thing or not, but i personally dont think having a relationship with someone who doesnt understand or want to understand my lifestyle or beliefs would work long term.

Do i miss any non vegan foods?
No i dont... which in a way i find so strange. I find it strange that i dont miss quark or eggs or chicken. Those were HUGE parts of my diet a year ago, not to mention all the marabou as well as Ben and Jerrys... but i dont miss any of them at all. Its strange, but also nice... because i dont know if i could be vegan if i missed those foods as then i would just feel restricted and unhappy. But i know that there are options and alternatives for all animal products so i can eat those options instead for example if i crave chocolate, cookies, ice cream etc Though i am also lucky that i live in Sweden where there is such a huge variety and range of vegan foods!
 Also i have realised how thankful i am that Cola Zero, Celsius and Monster energy drink are vegan.... i sometimes question if i would give up Cola Zero if it wasnt vegan....

Would i ever eat meat again/would i eat the new lab grown meat? Would i eat insects?
Would i eat just meat or eggs again... no. It doesnt appeal to me in any way and not something i miss or feel i need to eat.
Would i eat the new lab grown meat? I dont think so... ive gotten over the texture/smell/taste of actual meat and the last time i ate red meat was in 2011 (?) when i had to eat it at Mando. Otherwise it was just fish and chicken i ate... but i dont feel i need to eat those even if they are lab grown and no harm to animals is done. I.e they are ethically ok to eat... but who knows... if it was an option at a restaurant and it was lab grown i.e no harm to animals, and i was craving that meal then i would order it. The thing that stops me from eating meat or dairy is the ethical problems and not because i think its unhealthy, but also i dont crave it which makes it rather easy to not want to eat it as well.

And would i eat insects.... most likely not. Insects are still "Beings" and farming insects to be eaten also seems wrong.... but from an environmental aspect insects are better to eat than cows or pigs or chickens etc But this is a huge topic with so many different views and opinions and would crave a huge long post which i dont feel like doing.

Will I refill my tattoos once they begin to fade?
My first tattoo which i did 5 years ago is beginning to fade slightly so i began to wonder whether i should have it refilled again. Or whether i will refill my 4 other ones in the future.... its hard to say. They are slightly faded, but not grey..... once they start to turn grey or a little "green" then i might refill them. Or when my dream catcher tattoo begins to lose its colour then i might refill it.... but for now the focus is just on getting more tattoos and not so much filling in the older ones (which i.e will take a few years until that is actually something to think about!)

Spirulina gives me SO MUCH energy. Its actually a much better energy boost than coffee or energy drinks. My body is so used to caffeine that it has no effect on me... but if i take 1-2 tbs of spirulina it gives me so much new energy, so perfect in the afternoons! Not to mention it has so many vitamins and minerals which is great as well!

I love how my room mates dont question my tea and coffee consumption. I can drink 2 cups of coffee in the morning and sometimes 2 cups in the middle of the day if im at home and studying and then 2-3 cups of tea in the evening.... they have yet to say anything, but i am sure they have their thoughts or concerns haha.
I sometimes wonder if they think i am rude or anti social that i like to spend alot of time in my room. Recently i have felt so tired and have had alot of school work or been sick, so i havent been so social and i feel a little ashamed as i dont want them to think i am rude. But at the same time when i am at home i am either studying, blogging or napping. And im social and talk with them when im out making food and such, but i guess i just wish i was the type of person who liked to keep my door open or always made conversation.... its hard to explain and i dont really know how they feel or think either and i dont want to bring it up unnecessarily. But i might do.... just to know how they think so that im not worrying unnecessarily - or if they do think i am anti social and a little too isolated. Who knows... but random thoughts ive had anyway.

Anyway.... those were just some thoughts i felt like sharing for no real reason than trying to think of other things than school work and anxiety XD

Important life reminders

I personally love seeing quotes and reminders like these from time to time. They make me think and remind me of certain things i need to/should remember.

Your mind will always believe everything you tell it. Feed it faith. Feed it truth. Feed it with love.:
365 Happiness Project 2017 – Quote 73:
I really like this quote, but I don't think this would truly take just one day. You'll have to fight for much longer, survive for much longer, persevere for much longer. And the truth is some of us won't get there. The world is too unforgiving for that. However, I do believe that even if we never reach a position where we can stop caring, friends and family will be the comfort you need.: "Find balance... breathe, trust and let go." I love this, from beginning to end.:

spilled ink prose love it's not pretty but it is true:

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Struggling with anxiety

I apologize for the lack of update today, but today has been a very tough day mentally.

I've felt overwhelmed with anxiety and the type of anxiety that leads to physical pain and discomfort. Where my stomach turns into a knot, i lose my appetite, i get a headache, feel tired and unmotivated and just this uncomfortable and heavy feeling. Anxiety weighing heavy on my shoulders - and not even sure what the anxiety stems from. And then this evening the anxiety turned into sadness.... wanting to cry for no apparent reason (and no, its not hormones. Does anyone else hate when people try to belittle your feelings or emotions by saying "its just your hormones"... whether its hormones or not doesnt matter) and just longing to spend time with my family and my dog again. Feeling lonely and sad and anxious... thats how my day has been spent. And i more than ever just want to sleep and want this day to be over, but as ive slept away most of the day i'll most likely be up half the night with the anxious feelings and sadness.

I am not writing this for attention - and also I KNOW that within 24-48 hours i'll most probably feel better. But i am writing this mostly to show that yes, i do struggle with anxiety. Yes i do have bad days and sometimes life is tough even if life is amazing 99% of the time. There are days and periods in life where it just feels tough. But also that unfortunatly life isnt always amazing despite recovering from an eating disorder.... but most importantly, to show the truth and to be honest. No one is happy 24/7. People have bad days... and i am not ashamed to admitting that i have bad days and days where i can barely get out of bed. And times when i just try to sleep through the anxiety or sit and just stare at a wall, trying to sort of my thoughts and feelings and emotions. Not everyday is easy, but i know that life is worth it.

It scares me in a way to post these types of posts as i am worried that potential managers might find my blog and read a post like this and then think that i am not a good job candidate because of anxiety. But that is not the case, despite feeling this way i still get up and do what i have to. Fight through the anxiety to do what needs to be done. But i dont want to deny how i feel either or just put on a smile and pretend that today has been easy, because it hasnt... i have felt awful, i have felt tired and sad and anxious... and just wanted these feelings to go away. And i know they will....

Writing helps me to deal with these feelings, which is why i write on here. But also to share and be honest on here, i think that is very important. Transparency and honesty and not being ashamed of the bad days.

Just like i share the good times in my life i also share the bad times.

Tomorrow will hopefully be a better day... and i hope that you have all had a good day or atleast manage to make tomorrow a better day!!!

Depression: You don't know why you're exhausted? You're fighting a war inside your head every single day. If that's not exhausting I don't know what is.
Supporting a Loved One Through PTSD or Panic Attacks .....Helpful tips for the supporters to handle every PTSD or anxiety episode........... Safety Anchoring, Touch (Use with extreme caution!), recuperating, talk and plan ahead.....Learn more......:

I dont have an eating disorder because...

“I eat too much!”There is no maximum calorie limit for eating disorders. An eating disorder is not about what you eat, but how you eat- your feelings/thoughts about your body and your intake.
I’m not underweight!”The majority of people who develop an eating disorder will never become underweight. The only disorder that is diagnosed based partially on weight is anorexia- and for that, if you’re an average weight but meet every other criteria, you’ll still be diagnosed with ‘atypical anorexia nervosa’. It doesn’t mean you aren’t sick or that you don’t need help.
“I don’t meet the anorexia/bulimia guidelines!”OSFED (formerly known as EDNOS) is not a ‘failed’ eating disorder. It is every bit as serious as anorexia or bulimia. It is also the most commonly diagnosed eating disorder, meaning more people have this than anorexia or bulimia.
I don’t make myself sick!”Vomiting is only one form of purging. You can have bulimia, anorexia or OSFED/ARFID and not make yourself sick.
“I still eat!”So does everybody else. You can’t photosynthesise, after all. Even people with eating disorders eat.
“I feel like a fake/ a fraud!”So does basically every single other eating disordered person. This is a really, really, really, really common feeling. You might feel guilty for ‘misleading’ other people into believing the problem is more serious than it is, or feel like you’re overblowing things. That’s totally normal and it is not true. You are not a fake or a fraud.
“I eat things that no real anorexic would eat!”
I have known eating disordered patients with these safe foods: chocolate, frozen meat pizza, fruit, ice cream cones, potatoes, granola
I have known eating disordered patients with these fear foods: : chocolate, frozen meat pizza, fruit, ice cream cones, potatoes, granola
Safe/fear foods are not based on logic or reason. They are individualised. There are even people who don’t have any fear foods- they’ll eat anything, they’ll just feel crappy and purge it/ restrict afterwards. All of the experiences described here are those of a person with an eating disorder.
“I’ve never been inpatient!”Neither have most eating disorder sufferers.
“I’ve never been tube fed!”Neither have most eating disorder sufferers.
I’ve never been near death!”Neither have most eating disorder sufferers.
My blood work/ blood pressure is fine!Eating disorders affect different bodies in different ways. Some people find their blood work suffers; others find their blood pressure or pulse dips; others find that, whilst they’re suffering hugely mentally, their bodies hold up well. This is not a measure of how ‘sick’ you are. All of these things- weight, bp, pulse etc- are just symptoms of the sickness. The sickness is in your head.
“I don’t feel sick enough.”
You never will. Sorry. “I’m not sick enough!” is one of the most common ED thoughts there is; please don’t listen to it. It is a lie. Do not compare your misery to someone else’s; nobody with stage I cancer says ‘yeah, but that person is a stage III, so I’m not really that bad and I won’t get any treatment yet’.
I still get my period!”‘Period loss’ has been removed from the DSM as necessary for a diagnosis of anorexia, and no other eating disorder requires it. It was viewed as a flawed measure of illness, and so it has been removed. Whether or not you get your period is not an indication of how ill you are.
“But I binge eat without throwing up”Binge eating disorder is a newly added eating disorder in the DSM, where people eat large amounts of food in an ‘out of control’ manner but then do not compensate inappropriately for it. It is very much a real eating disorder.
“I don’t calorie count/ weigh myself!”I know many people with eating disorders- including anorexia- who have never calorie counted, or who don’t own a pair of scales. It’s not required for diagnosis.
“I think about food all the time!”This is a symptom of an eating disorder. Malnutrition causes the brain to focus 100% of its attention on food- finding it, getting it, eating it. Daydreaming or fantasizing about food does not mean you are not sick; quite the opposite, in fact.
“But I enjoy eating!”
Most people do. Eating is enjoyable. Even in the depths of my restriction, the food I ate brought me great pleasure. It’s linked to the previous point, to a certain extent. Enjoying food does not mean you don’t have an ED.
“But this is just how I am!”Eating disorders often start in early childhood, and it can be hard to break out of a pattern that well-entrenched. It’s not impossible, though. Chronic eating disorders can be harder to beat, but they can be beaten.
For more information on eating disorders and what to do if you think you have one, visit

Dont take your negativity out on others

Over the years of blogging i dont know how much hate i have received - alot to say the least. Many comments deleted, many hateful emails sent to me and different hurtful comments sent my way. However i am also very lucky because compared to others i have received very little hate and the negativity has been outweighed by all the positivity and supportive followers i have. So the few hateful messages are just needles in a haystack of positivity.

However one of the things i have also noticed over the years is that many who sent me hate end up emailing me back months or years later to apologize for the messages they sent me. To apologize for their hate towards me and have said that their hate and hurtful messages stemmed from their own feelings or jealousy. Their anger and their eating disorder - not believing that a person can actually recover from an eating disorder, not believing that someone can love their body or workout to be healthy - not just to change your appearance or to lose weight. Not believing that you can eat without compensation or realising that my life is more than just food even if that is what i do post about on here. Over the years i dont know how many times ive been accused of still being sick or lying about being recovered, despite people only reading/seeing what i post online. But many of those who accused me of being sick have later sent me messages apologizing and saying that they just didnt believe true recovery was possible or that a person could be happy or healthy again - until they achieved that goal themselves.

It makes me happy when people do email me back and are able to say sorry even if i have moved on from their messages and their comments. It makes me happy that the person can atleast look back and realise that what they said was wrong, but most of all makes me happy that the people have been able to recover and to hopefully feel healthy and recovered and happy and realise that i am not lying about that full recovery is possible if you work towards it. 

I do realise that an eating disorder can turn people into someone they arent. While i was sick i would say awful things and think awful thoughts about people when i had alot of anxiety. I was bitter, angry, jealous.... i didnt understand how people could be happy, healthy and carefree. It made me jealous, even if i never said anything and never wrote any messages or such there were definitely times i felt bitterness and anger towards people who seemed so happy. So i understand that that can be the case for some of my followers... maybe you see my blog or read my posts and feel anger and jealousy - How can she be happy? How can she be recovered? How can she eat like that? How and why can she workout and i cant? etc etc But just remember that those thoughts are your eating disorder and sending negativity or hate is never the answer. Instead realise that recovery is possible for  YOU as well. .Health and happiness is possible for YOU if you work towards it. You can be free and healthy and that goes for depression as well.

But also remember that no one ever forces you to follow my blog or anyone elses. It is YOUR choosing so if you do feel irritated or triggered or jealous or angry towards me, or anyone else you follow, then unfollow. Never ever send hate to anyone. Never send an angry or rude or nasty message to someone, it will never do any good. And if you do think someone is sick or unhealthy, it doesnt help to send them a message accusing them of being sick - it is family and friends and people close to the person who has to step in. Not random people online - so even if you think you are helping by accusing someone of eating too little, lying or still being sick it infact wont do any good at all.

This is just some thoughts i wanted to share. I understand that the hate i get isnt personal and most likely stems from some emotion within the person sending the message. And i am good at brushing off hate and negativity. But it still baffles me at times that people can sit down and spend time and energy to write hateful and hurtful messages to someone they dont even know.... that energy could instead be spent on figuring out why you are hateful and bitter and what you can do about it. Or maybe just writing out your thoughts and feelings on a piece of paper and not sending anonymous hate to people online. But like mentioned above.... many have eventually apologized to me which is kind of nice in a way, hahah. I dont think many people recieve apologies after receiving anonymous negativity... but like mentioned, i think its because the hate comes from the eating disorder and not from the actual person, but instead strong emotions and feelings and its easier to put that hate on someone else than to deal with the actual emotions behind the feelings.

And to end this post. I just want to say thank you for all my kind and supportive followers/friends. You mean so much to me and i am just happy i can help and that 98% of all the messages i recieve are positive and put a huge smile on my face when reading them!!! So keep spreading and sharing positivity and remember - unfollow people who you dislike or trigger you and never send anonymous hate. Instead write it on a piece of paper and tear that piece of paper up and then move on with your life! Instead, send anonymous compliments and positivity that will help the world and yourself and others in a much better way!

Image result for send compliments

Monday, March 27, 2017

Monday - planning for the future and strawberries and cream.

Good evening everyone :)

Its 9.30pm here in Sweden and im sitting here munching on chocolate chips to satisfy my sweet tooth after dinner, and just spent the last hour making plans for the future. Feeling hopeful and excited and ready to work for my goals. Nothing in life comes for free, work and time and effort has to be put in to reach your goals and that is exactly what i plan to do.  Just need to try to figure out planning and logistics and see if i can actually turn my ideas into reality!

Today has just flown by like crazy. An early morning start, trying to get back into routine and back into the gym again. Though i cant say that the workout went so well, i am feeling a little "off" from the gym at the moment... hard to explain but like the motivation just isnt there. So instead i think ill just continue going for walks until i feel that motivation and spark to strength train again... no need to force myself to the gym if i just go there and dont feel super excited. My motivation will be back again sometime!

After that it was study on my own in school - only 3 more study days left until my test. And i am more than ready to just get it over with... at this point it just feels like i am rereading my notes over and over and getting caught up in the smallest of details which  i usually do when i study. Instead trying to focus on the bigger picture which is often what the tests are about.

And then when i got home again it was time for a snack - defrosted strawberries with cashew nuts, chocolate chips, soy whipped cream and a saffron cookie. And then i added some oatmilk and stevia once the picture was taken!

After my snack i actually fell asleep for an hour or so... not so sure why. Ive been feeling extra tired recently and not sure whether its due to lack of a vitamin or mineral or if i just generally feel a little bit out of balance, or it might even be an infection/bacteria in my lungs as i defintely feel that my CF health and breathing is alot harder at the moment. So im going to talk to my doctor and maybe start on antibiotics - again - which will hopefully help. Even if the 2 weeks im on the antibiotics they make me tired and make my mood go up and down, but in the long term its worth it.

And then after that it was just to spend some time with my room mates, make dinner and then i started with my "putting ideas onto paper and into action" and now updating my blog :)

A long, rather productive day... with a nap in the middle, hahah.

I hope you have all had a lovely Monday and a good start to the new week.

Seeking professional care/treatment

When i first began struggling and stopped eating(and begun purging) i didnt think it was strange and it didnt ring any bells for myself or my family (though it was very secretive). But i thought, who cares if i dont eat breakfast or lunch, i eat dinner. And then with purging, i first began purging due to food poisoning but even after the food poisoning i kept purging and didnt think it was anything strange, though when i was still purging several weeks and months later i began to realise it wasnt normal, but it took more than a year for my family to actually realise what i was doing. Eating disorders are secretive and the signs and symptoms arent always obvious, the person who is sick wants to hide what they are doing.

With this post though i want to talk about seeking help or talking to people. I know that treatment can be expensive and not everyone has the funds to actually receive treatment and sometimes the first treatment you receive isnt the best. But there is always someone you can talk to, even if it is an eating disorder hotline or suicidal hotline. There is always someone you can talk to.

But i also want to bring up the fact that blogs and online sites arent always enough, and it is important to get some sort of help or treatment. I love that my blog can help you and act as a sort of first step or give you some advice, but it is not always enough. For some, it is and that is absolutely great but i do ALWAYS suggest that seeking professional help should be the first step. It is hard, i know. I have never willingly seeked help and the treatment i received was because i was forced into treatment, so unfortunately i am not such a great role model on the front of seeking professional help. But that doesn't stop me from advising others to do it, because it is helpful. And if you dont recieve help for some reason then online help can be great, but having support around you and someone you can talk to is important.

It is not always easy to talk to others or ask for help, but it is a first step and a very important step. If you dont ask for help you will never know whether you receive it or not. So you have to gather the courage and talk to someone and also realise that you need help. You need to want to recover for yourself and your life. Know that recovery may be tough, but it is worth it, i promise you that!! Life has its ups and downs but life is so much easier and so much better when you arent suffering from an eating disorder.

So if you have kept your eating disorder a secret or you feel yourself relapsing or you are struggling, this week i want you to ask for help. Whether you talk to your family, friends, school nurse, therapist, doctor, hotline... talk to someone and ask for help because you deserve help and deserve to get better!!

"It’s Time to Talk About It
The National Eating Disorders Association’s free Information and Referral Helpline is a safe and confidential place to ask questions, find support and receive free information and referrals. We are available Monday - Thursday 9am-9pm & Friday 9am-5pm Eastern Time. Our volunteers receive intensive training on eating disorders, and are here to guide you!  
The  NEDA Helpline can be contacted at (800), and through our click-to-chat feature on our website at  
You may also find information and referrals to eating disorders experts on our website at" 


New week, structure and routine

Good morning everyone :)

I hope you have all had a lovely weekend and been able to rest up, or be productive and get lots done.. whatever you needed the most :)

My 4 day weekend, i.e Thursday to Sunday has just been a sort of blur where the days have glided into one. Ive studied at home, worked out, gone for walks outside, meal prepped, watched series, slept a whole bunch and on Friday evening it was a spontaneous agreement to go to a house party. All i can say is that that party got way too crazy and out of hand with tables being turned, physical altercations, neighbours complaining and a high risk that the police was going to be called. And far too much alcohol for my poor body, but yet i was still the most sober one and just trying to get my friend out of the party before something seriously bad would happen. Safe to say that the next 48 hours i felt tired and still almost a little shocked at everything that happened that night and just a reminder why i dislike alcohol and how it can change people so completely. Im pretty sure the people were nice but the alcohol turned them violent and agressive and that is not people i want to be around, especially not when different substances are involved.  For now im ok if i dont party at all for the next 6-12 months.... however ive got a bunch of parties lined up over the next few weeks, but i'll see whether i go and just go sober or if i just dont go at all to avoid alcohol and alcohol affected people, haha.

Moving on... its a new week and i dont think ive ever been happier to get out of the house and get back into structure and routine. To go back into school and study and feel like i am being productive. I have realised that i am someone who needs structure badly - i hate just being at home feeling like im doing nothing. Too many days at home and i start to feel a panicked feeling. Thats what i love about school or work, it gives me structure and i leave the house for several hours a day so that when i come home i can just rest. Im the type of person who needs to leave the house everyday and do something productive and also realising more and more that meeting people is so important, in the past i could go a week or more without meeting anyone but now i feel like if it goes 3-4 days without meeting my friends i start to feel a bit lonely and like i need to meet someone soon.

Now its Monday, a new week and i am ready to be productive in all areas of my life. And also to get back into blogging. I had - and have - no inspiration to blog... i just dont know what to write about but i'll try my best to answer questions or blog something everyday nonetheless and see where blogging takes me whether i keep it up or decide to just let it die out and move on... i dont really know at the moment.

Anyway, i hope you all have a lovely week!!!

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Feeling extra hungry?

Extreme hunger? Feeling extra hungry? Mindless eating?

I have alot of posts about those topics HERE which you can check out. And also  THIS and THIS post about extreme hunger might be helpful.

The past few days i have been alot more hungry and felt like there is always room for more and needing to eat more than usual to fill me up. I do know what the reason for this is though - doing more cardio again. This is mostly for my CF health but also that it is so much fun and so therapeutic, but my body is also showing that by doing more exercise i also need to eat more. 

It is so important to eat enough when you workout. Dont workout to eat, but eat to live life (and if that includes exercising then you need to fuel up for that as well!). 

Hunger isnt something you should be ashamed about or try to get rid of. Drinking water or diet soda or chewing gum to try to get rid of the hunger wont work. If its real hunger then you need to eat. Of course it can be very hard to know whether its real hunger, just cravings, boredom, mindless eating etc but when its real hunger then it doesnt just "go away" when you begin doing something else, the hunger stays there and reminds you to eat.

Sometimes you need more food and then you need to eat more. If you are stressed or anxious or arent sleeping properly or just have alot of work or doing more in life then your body can respond with more hunger signals because your body is using more energy so you need to eat more to make up for that! 

I dont really know why im writing this post... mostly i guess because i began thinking about how im alot more hungry now with the extra exercise and i just wanted to remind you all that you need to fuel yourself properly and its ok to eat more. Even if you dont workout, you can still have days where you are extra hungry. For example yesterday was a day where my stomach was like a bottomless pit... i felt hungry all the time and ate alot. But my body needed that extra energy!!

Listen to your body and eat the amount your body needs. Treat your body like a friend and treat it right!!! Somedays your stomach is like a bottomless pit and then its just to eat more and not worry about it. The body is amazing and can handle extra calories - but there is usually a reason for extra hunger, so knowing that reason can help as well!

Anyway, HERE you can find posts about intuitive eating and feeling extra hungry which might help! :)

Vegan meal ideas

Its been a long time (or feels like it anyway) since i did a "what i ate in a day" post or even shared what i have eaten recently... so here come some recent eats and vegan meal ideas :)

Sweet potatoe gnocchi and home made pesto

Spring rolls with different fillings - whatever your favourite veggies are!

Vegan sushi - very simple to make and just add your favourite sushi fillings!
Can take some time and the first time isnt the easiet, but it gets easier and quicker to make over time!

Mashed sweet potatoe with peanut butter, granola, banana... a great snack or breakfast idea!

Burgers - Filling can be whatever your favourites are!!

Nacho chips topped with vegan meat (or other substitue) and guacamole

Pasta with oven roasted chickpeas and guacamole

Oven roasted vegetables! Top with your favourite suace and add some tofu or beans or soy meat for protein.

Tofu and sweet potatoe fries

Sweet potatoe brownies