Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Monday, February 27, 2017

Start of a new course & busy being an adult

Hello and good evening everyone :)

I'll start off by saying that today has been far from a good day. Its been one of those days where i have just wanted to go back to bed and pull the cover over my head and just sleep until its a new day.

This morning i woke up with lasting stomach pain from yesterday, and it has yet to subside. The stomach pain also comes along with bloating and a nauseous feeling and just a general "i dont want to go outside, i dont want to be around people" type of mood. And no amount of painkillers lessens the stomach pain either, so its just to try to get through the day nonetheless.

I started my day off with going to the gym, though 10 minutes into the gym session i realised that it just wasnt going to work. Today wasnt one of those days where stomach pain lessens and goes away when i workout, if anything it got worse and there was no way i could tighten my core which is necessary during strength training. So not only did the exercise make me feel like getting sick, it also increased the risk of injury from not having the right form or technique during the exercise. So it was just to grab a mat and do some stretching before heading to school and waiting until my lecture began.

Today its the start of a new course which im both looking forward to but also feel a little irritated over the structure of the course. It will be alot of work and long days so i apologize in advance if blog posts lessen the next few weeks as there will be alot of school work. But there will also be alot of cooking - which is fun, but also means that i will have to cook and prepare food with meat, eggs, dairy which i dont feel like doing. Or i am "ok" with eggs and dairy but not with meat.... Though maybe i wont have to actually cut or prepare the meat, maybe i can just do the side dishes instead. I am also a little irritated because one of our mandatory cooking sessions is sponsored by a dairy business who will provide a whole bunch of dairy products for us to use and cook with - and then taste the recipes that they have provided. Part of me wants to skip this class in protest, as i did ask if i could do all the recipes but use alternative products (and buy them myself), but that was not allowed. I find it a little strange how a class can be "sponsored" by a company? Of course i wont be made to taste the recipes, but i will have to cook and make the recipes and it just puts me in a confusing situation and a situation i would much rather not be in.
But im not going to complain about it... atleast i get to go to school, but i cant say that i am excited about cooking with meat :(

However i am excited that i get to influence others and come with suggestions about vegan recipes so that is something positive anyway! Its a group project where we will choose 5 recipes and do a lecture about vegetables/beans which i find fun, and if im honest... i wish i could do the whole project on my own! I would have no problem standing infront of the class for 60-90 minutes holding a lecture about vegetables, beans, vegan diet and the benefits, the nutritional positives and negatives, what to think about, how to cook them, how they affect the climate and also how to combine and cook with vegetables and beans etc etc If you cant tell, im rather excited about it and wish i could just start right away instead of having to wait until we ´meet as a group!!

Aside from the stomach pain and start of a new course today has been a day of "adulting" - phone calls, emails, documents, applying for jobs, studying. Doing the laundry, cleaning, soon about to do my weekly food shopping and later finally get the chance to wash my hair, hahaha!

A long day with non stop stomach pain, but thats life.... sometimes you just have to do things and make the best of the day even if you would much rather just lie in bed and refuse to do anything.

I hope you have all had a good day and make the best of this week!!!


  1. I had one of those days today as well, woke up at about 10:00 pm, about two hours after I went to bed and had vomiting and nausea until 2:00 am. Been at home all day and barely made it through a 30 minute yoga session. Let's hope we both feel better tomorrow.
    Sincerely, Emily

  2. I am really impressed at how you manage to do so much when you do not feel like it!
    One day, your lectures on vegan nutrition will be inspiring to many, I am sure, no matter whether they ultimately agree with you or not.
    Have a good day.

  3. I don`t know how you keep going when you get tummy pain - me, I feel so awful all I can do is cuddle my hot water bottle in bed until it subsides :( I hope you are feeling better by now and having better days.
    It doesn't sound all bad with your new study course - admittedly you could do without the cooking with meat - I can appreciate that will be very hard for you - but you do get to do work about vegan food so that is something you can shine in and enjoy. The dairy company must be funding the ingrediants for the cooking sessions and getting some free advertising into the bargain - similar scenarios here whereby large supermarket chains sponsor school functions or help buy equipment they need. Maybe you can chat to your lecturer nearer the time about your reasons for not wanting to handle and cook with meat, surely they should be sympathetic and understand your reasons? I don`t see the harm in you cooking with meat substitutes instead, I mean its not as if you don`t already know how to cook meat - its just that you choose not to - so its not as if you are actually skipping part of the course? Anyway, I hope you can get this resolved ok!
    Good luck with the job seeking - what kind of employment are to trying to get?

  4. Hi Izzy - could you write a post with ideas for simple vegan meals based on store cupboard ingredients - and also things like what to do with lentils, chickpeas etc rather than just having them as a side dish? Sometimes I don`t feel like following an involved recipe and just want to put things together that I have already in the cupboard, but I`m sadly lacking in ideas/inspiration.
    If you`ve got the time to do this that would be great - and maybe other readers could share their ideas for simple yet basic yummy meals?