(picture from 2014/2015 i think)
I have a question- when did you start to love doing exercise? You probably didn't like it when you had an eating disorder because you had to force yourself to do it.. How did you find a kind of exercise that you really enjoy? Do you do any yoga? Do you think yoga can help you while recovering? :)
You're right, when i exercised during my years of illness i didnt like exercise. I felt compelled to do it and even if i hated 95% of all the walks and runs i forced myself to do, the feeling of not doing it was worse. Eventually though with the help of treatment and lots of distractions and mental strength i learnt to rest and learnt to be ok with being still.
My first step to getting back to exercise was walking my dog, and it started off with powerwalking and barely stopping to let her pee because i just needed to keep walking. But at somepoint i realised that *hey, i can actually stop and take pictures, stop and let my dog pee and not have to powerwalk... just enjoy a walk or scenery. And id ont need to run either*, so that realisation was the first step to enjoying exercise again. I also did swimming which i enjoyed but then began at the gym and did a bunch of cardio which i did enjoy and enjoyed seeing progress, but in afterhand i do admit it went overboard and i have been honest about it before that my exercise back in 2012 when i was allowed to exercise again went a little over the top.
Eventually when i found strength training i began to love working out and exercising. When i began to realise i could actually get stronger and more functional. When i realised that there was more to exercise than just running or being on a cross trainer. When i realised that i didnt need to spend 60 minutes doing cardio 6 days a week to call it a workout, but instead could lift weights and get stronger. And i also loved circuit training which was a combination of both strength training and cardio. My love for exercise came back, as i did like exercise before i became sick, but it became an unhealthy obsession and compulsion which took the fun away. Over the years when less focus was on appearance and more on health, on enjoyment the more fun exercise became. When i realised i was strong, i was functional... that working out was helping me in life. In the past when i would over exercise i would often end up too tired to do anything the rest of the day, but when exercise became balanced again it gaev me lots of energy. It made me stronger, happier, more functionally capabale and something i loved doing. When i began to listen to my body, learned to rest when i needed it whether it was 1 day, 3 days or 1 week, knowing that resting would just do my body good and exercise wasnt something i *had to* do, but something i choose to do because i love it.
My love for exercise and love for myself and my body just grows over the years, and my life becomes more balanced over the years as well which just makes everything better as well :)
And when it comes to yoga, i used to do yoga as a child as my mum is a yoga teacher. And i have gone to a few of my mums yoga classes but its not my type of workout form, but really i should do it.... i think the people who like me, are a little too stressed, altitle too anxious and a little too restless, and say they cant do yoga are exactly the type of people who need yoga and meditation. Buve ive just never commited myself to it.
I think yoga can be very beneficial. To learn to relax, to use your body and stretch, to just breathe and feel the movements of your body, to meditate and appreciate your body and life. Its a form of exercise which can be relaxing and help with sleep and stress, however there are yoga forms which can be very intense but i wouldnt recommend those in recovery. Instead the calmer forms of yoga would be better! I would say its worth a try, and give it atleast 3 lessons before you make a decision :)