Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

Translate

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Making friends and connecting with people who spread positivity and energy & balance in life

Hello!!

Today has been such a wonderful day and the type of day which i love and fills me with energy. One of these days where i just live life and feel happy and positivity, days like this are a nice break from my "super focused on study" mindset which i usually live with.

So, how did my day start? Well first off with coffee and breakfast followed by singing happy birthday to my mother and giving her her birthday presents. After that i got ready and headed to the my old gym where i have a 10 day free training card which feels so great to have, hahah. But it also feels so strange to be back there and to see the workers there who all remember who i was and had questions about where i had been and what i was doing now (as they had all noticed i hadnt been there for x months). But also lots of the regular gym-goers who i saw almost daily... i am sure they have wondered why they havent seen me (but if they are smart they will have realised its either because i changed gym or moved), but they all looked surprised to see me there again as well as i saw a few wanting to come up and talk to me, but as i was in my zone they refrained, haha.  It feels great to be back to the gym again however they have changed the gym machines so i felt a bit like a "Newbie" at times when i had to stand and figure out how to readjust the seating for each machine, haha.


After that i headed into town to meet 4 other lovely girls who i have had contact with via Instagram. Originally i had gotten a message from a girl i didnt know who had followed me online and asked if i wanted to meet, and i thought it was so brave of her to send the message and i of course said yes to meet her. But then i thought it would be fun to try to get a group meeting/other instagrammers together but as usual with group conversations and trying to meet as a group not everyone can join and it ended up only being 5 of us and the girl who originally wanted to meet me couldnt even come today. So i felt a little bad about that as i was the one who suggested doing a group meeting... but maybe i can meet the other girl another day anyway!!

It was so lovely to meet the 4 other girls and they are all so positive and sweet and all so smart and have a great mindset. They are all vegans and have all suffered with an eating disorder in the past, so we had that in common as well as a love for nutrition and such. But we all seem to live a much more balanced life now as well as a much more balanced mindset. It was lovely to meet them and also makes me so happy with the positive influence and how great instagram and social media can be. Of course social media has its negatives and can be a very negative influence, but its all about how YOU use it and whether you follow accounts that trigger you and make you feel bad about yourself and give you anxiety, or whether you follow accounts (I.e actual people) who spread positivity and happiness and motivate and inspire you!! I love social media and it has given me so much positivity and opportunities, even if it was once a negative thing for me and i followed negative accounts and got anxiety over social media. But now its mostly positive, but also being able to meet people i never would have met otherwise. Also i know that if i ever were to travel to different countries and places, there are so many of my readers who have wanted to meet me or even said that i can stay with them if i ever decide to visit their country/city and that is pretty amazing... that through social media you can meet and connect with people!! Of course, i cant forget about the negatives about social media and i have infact had people steal my pictures and contact me in ways that arent positive and also "almost had a stalker", so i cant forget about those things but as long as i still keep those in mind i feel ok using social media!!







I left the cafe feeling positive and filled with energy and when i got home it was just to start making a dessert/cake for my mum as well as making a tofu and vegetable soup (as they were going to eat a fish soup.) During baking i got a craving for a glass of white wine, and that is exactly what i had. I dont promote drinking, but since starting university - this time round - as well as since lessening my exercise amount and thinking less in "Black and white", my mindset about alcohol has changed. Of course 0 alcohol is best, but i have come to realise that a glass or two now and again isnt the end of the world and i dont need to be 0 or 100. I.e i can drink a glass and thats enough and just enjoy the glass of wine. Because like i have said in the past, i do like the taste of wine and alcohol, but its been the actual alcohol i havent liked as well as having the black and white thinking where, if i had one glass i would end up having 3 because it felt like "ive already ruined it"... which is a very destructive mindset.
 Over christmas i have been able to enjoy a glass of wine and keep it at just that... a glass. Not feel guilty, not feel like it will affect me negativtly or think it will affect my workouts because it doesnt... and even if it does somewhat affect my workouts - well i am not an elite or trying to be super strict, i dont need to be super strict. It feels so much better and healthier - for ME - now when i can have balance with alcohol. It was a little annoying and hard to feel like i couldnt drink because i would end updrinking too much.... change of mindset and allowing myself to enjoy one glass without having more has been key!! Just like when i was recovering from binging i had to realise that it was ok to eat one or two cookies and i didnt have to eat all 12, or it was ok to have a slice of bread without eating the whole package... a change of mindset and change of black and white thinking!!






To end this super long post, i have had a lovely day and enjoyed meeting new friends, enjoyed dinner with my family, enjoyed dessert and now im having some alone time before its back to family time before its time for bed and a whole day of studying tomorrow!!!

I hope you have all had a lovely day and continue to have a lovely week!!!

16 comments:

  1. You have like no boobs You should gain some weight don't look good at all

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I really pity you for taking your time to hate on other people on the Internet. You must have such a sad life.

      Delete
    2. Such an unnecessary comment it almost makes me laugh, hahah? Not sure if the point was to bring me down or just to vent own frustration?

      Delete
  2. I loved this post izzy, it's so inspiring to see you getting out of your comfort zone a little because that's something I definitely need to do. It's nice that you seem a bit less stressed about studying as well!
    And you look great as always, I hope you don't let stupid people's negative comments bother you <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you :) yes, i feel like each year i grow and dare a little more... and thats the amazing thing in life that you progress and grow and do more things!! :) You just have to keep trying and hopefully it gets easier!

      Delete
  3. could you maybe do a post on doing less exercise, and changes you may feel mentally/physically, and how you feel?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes i can defnitely try to do this :)

      Delete
  4. Wow, I'm sorry about the rude comment. You look beautiful, I absolutely love your outfit! It's great that you're finding more balance in your life, that's something that I really have to work towards. And that cake looks delicious!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you :) I feel like i find more balance in my life as the years go, and thats just normal... you keep growing and progressing as the years pas. And thank you, the cake was delicious :)

      Delete
  5. Hi! I have this wierd situation. I won't be able to access a gym the following year and therefore are loosing muscles. Instead I do running and such. Now it's a been a month since I last did muscletraining and I have lost one kg, but yeah I look the same so i'm very sure this is muscles. The thing is this makes me underweight, and If I lose more muscles I get more underweight. I've had a stabile weight for over a year and are actually pretty recovered so i'm not sure I should do anything about it since it's just numbers and don't seem to have change my apperiance and still over all are healthy. On the otherhand I guess it's not good to be underweight either as a recovered anorectic. What do you think? It also feels stupid to gain fat just to be in the right bmi-standards. I do still have my period...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can understand your situation and like you said, a year without strength training will result in some muscle loss, however by running and just being active you will still maintain some muscle. I dont personally think BMI is so important when people are in a healthy weight range, but it isnt good to be underweight either... because it could be that you might lose some weight (both muscle and fat) and then you lose your period, and that would be because of the weightloss and you would have to regain weight. Gaining fat isnt a bad thing and most likely wont do you any harm and might be a positive thing infact.
      I wouldnt focus so much on numbers unless you notice that you are losing weight, then i would recommend you to regain weight (remember that if you have gone from strength training to now doing alot of cardio and running that is going to burn more calories so you are going to have to eat more). Also if you have only been ahealthy weight because of you gaining muscle mass, then maybe gaining some fat is actually a good thing?

      Also remmeber that losing muscle takes time so dont panic over it, and doing some resistance band training or body weight training can help you maintain strength/resistance, but also that you will lose some water as the muscle retains water! Just keep that in mind, so if you lose weight it will be a combination of muscle, fat and water i.e you cant lose just a kg muscle - which i amsure you already know!

      Just make sure to eat enough, dont restrict just because you won go to the gym, you still need lots of energy and you are still exercising. Dont focus too much on weight, but make sure that it doesnt drop too low either, you need to have a healthy weight to live and do whatever it is you are doing inlife!

      Delete
    2. Thank you for the reply! :)

      Delete
  6. My period still hasn't come back and it's been a long time. I keep getting told to eat more fats, so I had two deep-fried cinnamon donuts as dessert. I feel sort of guilty about that, but I know it's irrational. Still, are 'unhealthy' fats like that going to be helpful for getting my period back or should I focus on adding extra nuts and oils to my diet?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You definitely shouldn't feel guilty about eating those donuts. However it's best to focus on healthy fats like nuts, seeds,oils, fish, coconut etc fat is necessary for the building of hormones and cells so fat is so so important to eat!!!

      Delete
  7. Wow! You sound so happy! I am so pleased that life is so good for you at the moment and you have found balance in areas of your life that are benefiting you :)You are living proof that anyone can make changes to their life if they really want to.
    It must have been nice actually meeting up the people you previously only knew online - and it must have taken courage to do so so I`m glad it all worked out, I think its great that you are widening your circle of friends!
    Hope you are continuing to have a lovely week and enjoy your time at home :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. that's so funny! I'm the same with alcohol but over Christmas realised I'd only had a glass and didn't go too crazy or have none. Maybe it's just a phase of life....:)

    ReplyDelete