It is currently 10.50pm Tuesday evening when i am writing this post. I was feeling super tired all day today which is understandable when i have worked 17 days in a row now, and today i was supposed to work 8 hours but worked 11 instead. And by the end of today i was completely exhausted, and i had one or two customers point out that i was a little tired and all i could do was say "Yeah, its a long day/alot of work". But by the end of my day there were definitely a few more mistakes being made than usual, luckily i could fix them without the customer noticing but the smile wasnt where it should be and i was feeling super tired.
Tomorrow is my first day off and i am super ready for it! I have a spa day planned and an evening which will just be spent at home doing nothing as that is all i need right now. I just need alone time and to not be around people for a while, to not have to talk or smile either - but just have my own space, something which i havent had for a long time now when working in a store.
Today i also had some nostalgia moments where i longed back to my own/shared apartment where i studied at university, longed back to the start of the year when i was living on my own (mostly... my room mate was barely at home so it felt like i lived on my own), and missed just living in that little bubble i had. And today was a day where i missed my ex quite a bit... just someone to talk to and spend time, missed the company and what used to be. But it was just to put those feelings aside and focus on the future and what the future will hold for me!!
Otherwise, you might have noticed if you follow my on social media that there has been a sort of "silence" and it hasnt been a planned one. But it is because my phone broke on Sunday. My phone has been pretty much 80% broken recently where my phone turns itself off every 2nd hour or so and the battery barely charges and other problems with it, but then i dropped it Sunday morning and that was the final drop. So since then i have been phoneless, which has been both a positive and a negative.
A negative because 1) I cant be reached/contacted and i cant really contact anyone. 2) I never know what time it is 3) I miss listening to music 4) I realise how dependant i am on my phone in some ways.
Positives: Went for a run without any music, not knowing distance or time and loved it... which i think is great, as it shows that i love running for what it is and i dont need to run and know time or speed or distance.
Focus more on what is around me and notice small positive things when walking to work without music on.
Doing other things like reading the newspaper instead of looking at my phone during my lunch break.
A social media break.
I am in a bit of a dilemma now though, because i have now gotten a very old phone replacement which basically i can make phone calls from and nothing else which is great. So either i can wait 3-4 weeks and use this phone just to make calls, and then buy the new Samsung Note 7 when it comes out or decide to just buy the Samsung S7 now and have an actual updated phone to use..... so not so sure what i want to do. But i am not super happy going 3-4 weeks without having any social media or music or podcasts.... Some would say it is great and a good "break for me", but i miss listening to music and miss listening to podcasts like crazy. Not to mention that going to the gym without my own music isnt as fun or motivating, hahaha. But i guess if that is the worst of my problems then my problems arent so bad, so i shouldnt complain!!
Otherwise, how am i feeling? I have been feeling positive and great for the most part, but then Sunday evening stomach pain kicked in like crazy and today it has been absaloutly awful. And work today was not fun with the amount of stomach pain i have had, and have just been incredibly tired and low today combined with nostalgic feelings and drained of all form of energy, so today hasnt been the best day. But focusing on a better tomorrow and in general am feeling pretty A-ok! Things are falling into place, i am working lots and have little time to do other things or actually think. However i have now booked my one way ticket to Gothenburg in 2 weeks time! My mum will be following with me on the Thursday and travelling home Friday morning, so i am happy over that fact - so that i dont have to wander alone on my own with huge bags trying to figure out the form of public transport and tickets in Gothenburg, hahahah. I am excited, but at the same time i havent had the time to process any of it yet... so it wont be until Tuesday when i pack my things - 2 days before i leave, that i will actually process what is happening!
Anyway, such a long post but i guess i had alot to write :) Just wanted to write an update as to why i am a little silent on here and my other social media. No phone and working 6-11 hours a day so there isnt much time or acess to social media. But i'll try my best :)
Photos... all i want right now:
Nachos and guacamole
Watermelon, sunshin and water
Long walk/run in the sun with a podcast playing!