Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Friday, August 12, 2016

Taco Friday and recovery run & talking about cravings

Hello and good afternoon everyone!
I am currenlty lying in bed with newly washed hair, wearing baggy clothes and watching youtube while i wait until i need to get ready and head to work. Personally i find it a little strange to start work so late i.e 3pm. By that time my sister and step dad are already home from their work and i am just starting... i prefer to start early and be home relatively early. However as i start so late today it also means that i have had alot of time this morning to do whatever i feel like, which meant 1) A run to the gym where i did some foam rolling and stretching, a 10 minute shoulder workout and then ran home again (and also stopped at my local store and went shopping in my sweaty clothes.... i felt sorry for those around me, but i didnt feel like going to the store later, and i had some major taco cravings i had to fill when i got home.

Today was just a sort of "test" run to see how my feet, knees and hips felt running, and it felt great - though i have no idea how long i actually ran, it could have been around 6-8km, not so sure. So now i am excited for my 10km run tomorrow!! It feels awesome to be back into running, to feel energetic again and to feel like i am just flying forward. No pain in my body or feet when i am running since i bought new shoes, but also no mental pressure over "Having to run" or "having to run a certain time or distance"... but instead just putting on my running shoes, going out running and enjoying every moment as much as possible! But also running makes my CF health so much better which then makes me even healthier and more happier when i can actually breathe somewhat normally. So it is a positive circle basically! Also recently as i havent had a phone i have gone for runs without any music, no distance or knowing time or speed and it has been super refreshing. Running because i LOVE IT and not just to run a distance or to hit a PR or because i have to, but because it is an amazing feeling!

Then when i got home i listened to my cravings and ate a taco meal:

Nacho chips, soy meat, sweet corn, peanuts, pizza sauce, soy yoghurt mixed with garlic powder & guacamole!! It was so amazingly good as well as filling, which i love.
I suggest you all to try a nacho plate because it is super good!

Recently i have gotten some questions regarding cravings and how to "not listen to them". But my advice is basically, listen to those cravings. Because cravings are often trying to tell you something... either that 1) You need to eat more, 2) You need more sleep/energy, 3) You are stressed, 4) You need a certain mineral or vitamin or even more of a certain food group etc
Sometimes of course you can change cravings, for example different cravings can mean different things. So maybe instead of eating 100g chocolate maybe what you need is some nuts and seeds instead. But of course sometimes all you need is that chocolate!

I also find that the more i listen to my cravings the less cravings i have. In the past if i set up rules like "no sugar during the week" or "go a month without X food" then i would automatically crave them alot more. If there were any foods i "couldnt eat" i would automatically crave them alot more, which is actually normal that it happens.

So when i follow my cravings and eat what i want then i dont get any extreme cravings unless my body is trying to tell me something for example when i was eating around 1kg frozen spinach a day as well as 200/300g raisins and dark chocolate (all items with alot of iron, meaning that my body needed more iron). I know that no foods are forbidden so i dont get any extreme cravings for foods because i know that if i want to eat something i will. Unlike when people have too many restrictions, eat too little or have too many forbidden foods then they can crave the strangest foods and food combinations because their body wants food and wants all the forbidden foods.

So my suggestion - follow your cravings. Because sure maybe you crave 100g chocolate, but after eating that for a few days you wont crave it anymore... sometimes you just need to get those cravings out of your system, but also if there is something in that food that your body needs. Maybe you need more energy or more carbohydrates in your diet if you are constantly craving alot of chocolate or high calorie foods.

The less restriction and less forbidden foods, the less extreme cravings you get because you know everything is ok to eat. So if you want chocolate you can eat it whether its  Tuesday evening or Thursday morning.

This is my opinon on it and what works for me, it might be different for everyone - but i listen to my cravings and that helps keep me physically and mentally healthiest and happiest!


  1. Hope your run went ok and you enjoyed yourself! That is what I find so refreshing when you post about your exercise - how much you obviously love it. Look forward to seeing any pictures!
    I know what you mean about having to start work later rather than earlier. I used to feel the same way when I worked shifts at a nursing home, I much preferred the early shift to the later one as that meant I finished work early afternoon and had the rest of the day and evening, rather than working until later and coming home to do nothing more really than go to bed! How much longer are you working for until you finish for the summer?
    Your taco plate looked yummy - it is so long since I have had it so will have to remedy that. Do you flavour your "meat" with any Mexican spices?
    Interesting about the food cravings and I think you are definitely right when you say you should follow them. I recently had such a craving for cabbage of all things and nothing would do until I satisfied it. I believe too that it is the bodies way of telling you it is lacking in something. So yes, listen to those cravings and enjoy ! they`re there for a reason.
    Hope you had a great day and have a lovely weekend!

  2. Izzy i feel awful i feel like im losing control. Ive been feelinb so hungry ive been in pain. I cant concentrate on my work so ive had to eat extra at nite either fruit or a slice of toast but i feel so bad and worried that im gonna gain so much wgt esp as i havent been able to exercise all week cos of work & im so tired. I dont know how to stop the pain