Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Saturday, August 27, 2016

Are you living or just waiting to die

An important thing in recovery and when you are reaching the stage of almost recovered, its important to begin doing things with your life again... to begin with hobbies and school or work. Going out with friends or family. Doing something you enjoy... this is to get you moving away from your ED. To do something with your life and realise that there is more to life than being sick, worrying about calories and weight and body size. Its easy to get stuck in your ED, not really want to let it go because its a comfort. But if you begin doing things you enjoy like starting a hobby you enhoy, then you begin focusing on that and you move away from your eating disorder.
If you just follow the same routines, keep eating your meal plan, dont really do anything with your life... then you are still stuck in your ED routines. But also you can feel like, is recovery really worth it`?  You dont get your life happiness back, you dont really use your new gained energy. So when you are getting closer to a normal weight and getting your energy back, then begin doing things with your life... this will also help with more balanced eating. Learning to eat at different times, eat out, let others prepare food for you. Eat different things and at different places. But it can also teach you that if someone offers a cookie or some chocolate its ok to take some, even if its not your 'usual snack' time....

Doing things you enjoy will give you happiness and a sense of purpose which is what you need after having an eating disorder or any mental illness. You need to feel happy again, find your reason to live and to know that it was worth it to recover!!!

Make recovery worth it by looking into the future and creating a life you love and enjoy. If you just stick with old habits and routines, refuse to change or change thoughts and just keep thinking the past was better - well then yeah, it can be pretty hard to focus on the present and feel like life is great in the present.

Let go of the past and focus on making and creating the best life you can :)


  1. I can really identify with this, i have recently restarted college and although im not fully recovered im further than i have been but what im finding hard is that ive no time to exercise anymore and im finding i need to eat more cos i cant concentrate if i dont. Im like so hungry and cos i drive there i am not doing barely anything. Ive put on lots of weight this week and feel awful. Im trying to tell myself my work is more important but i dont know what to do about the fear, the guilt, the hunger and the weight gain

    1. ... I think fixing on work as most important sometimes keeps one sick ... It is friends, and generally being human, that is most important. If you spend enough time with people who accept you for things that have nothing to do with food or weight, then it is easier to stop making food - or work - quite so central to one's own sense of self-worth.
      Of course work is important, but it is not all-important. Much less food or weight.
      Well done for getting so far with recovery, and very best wishes for the rest of the way.

    2. Ive answered you ina post now which might help somewhat i.e with the extra hunger and less time to exercise bit.
      And think of how far you have come already and how you can keep going and keep fighting!! More focus on life and happiness and less focus on food and weight and body image :)

  2. Thanks so much for posting this, it really hot home with me. My latest recovery is from addiction instead of an ED, but my thoughts are the same - now that I am clean and actually working a solid recovery program, I don't want to waste this second chance at life (or tenth chance, lol). I want my recovery to mean something, and I want my life to be full. Getting clean (or gaining weight, for EDs) was just the first step. Recovery is so much better if you make the most of it. For me, I very easily get stuck in my safe bubble, and am fearful or resistant to venturing out. I have big dreams but then choose to stay put "for today". But those days add up to a lifetime. Lately I am putting my energies into striding out into the horizon. Taking action toward goals and dreams, one step at a time. I want to look back on my life with a smile one day, not with regret.

  3. Thankyou for posting this Izzy - it kind of looks at recovery at a different angle, one that I hadn't looked at before and its very useful. I never thought to think how I could get out of the routine of meal plans and eating at certain times, or was even aware that there would come atime when I did - like you say it is easy to get caught up in a routine and never look beyond that.