Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Answers to comments Part 1

What do you think of vegetarianism (as opposed to veganism)?
I think vegetarianism is great as well, but its just a diet not a lifestyle. And i guess vegetarianism is easier for people compared to eating a completely plant based diet/living a vegan lifestyle. And then of course there are different types of vegetariansm i.e whether a person eats eggs, dairy or fish as well.

If one goes out with people, how does one avoid making one's own dietary restrictions into a burden for them by limiting their choice in ways that are burdensome to them? especially if they are dietary restrictions that are self-imposed through lifestyle choice, rather than medically imposed?

If a persons choices are lifestyle choices they shouldnt affect things like going out with people/going out to eat. I mean it is one thing if diet choices are due to medical issues, religious reasons or ethical reasons. But if its just "i want to eat less sugar and less processed food to feel my best" and then your friends all want to go to McDonalds. Even if you have your choices that doesnt mean you have to say no to following with, i mean there is fruit available or you can eat some fries or take a salad and such. Your diet restrictions shouldnt hold you back or limit you. Of course i dont know what type of diet restrictions they are (?) which makes it hard to answer. For example if all my friends wanted to go to the steakhouse to eat dinner, even if they had a vegan option i dont think i would follow with because i wouldnt be comfortable in that setting. But otherwise most places would be able to serve a vegan option even if it meant altering the food a little. My tip would be to not let your food impose or be a burden.... instead realise that you should be able to find something to eat. In the past when recovering, whenever we went out to eat i would always be the one to decide because i wanted control and because i wanted to be sure that the place would have food i felt "ok with eating". But now i dont really care where we go out to eat, of course when we do go out to eat its usually just our typical and favourite places anyway.

Hi Izzy :)

I have a quick (hopefully :p) question. So a few years ago I was diagnosed with an ed. And I know that it's just a bad stereotype that people do it for attention and while that's not how it began with me, I find myself holding on to my ed and wanting to lose more weight for the attention aspect of it...did you ever struggle with this or have ever heard of this before??

I have heard of this before and its not "uncommon", because even if an eating disorder isnt for attention if a person has bad body image or is a person who naturally wants more attention or just has low self esteem then they can find that they are "good at something" i.e losing weight and realise they get attention from it. Bad example, but i have to write it. It is like a child who does something naughty and realises that they get attention from it, even if it isnt good attention i.e they get told off, it is still attention so they keep doing the same action because they know it will provoke a reaction. And then when people stop reacting the child will stop doing that naughty action because it is no fun anymore.
  In a way it is sort of similar, because even if the attention might not be all good... it is still attention.

THough i would stop and think, what is the real underlying problem? Maybe it is that you do need/want more attention in your life and you dont know how to get it in other ways? Maybe you can start a new hobby or find something you enjoy and are good at and get attention and praise in that way? But also to work on yourself and your thoughts and realise that 1) weightloss is not a good thing for you and 2) the attention you get isnt good attention

Also realise that you are more than your body. Because you are holding onto your eating disorder because you want to look a certain way - you want to maintain your body that gives you attention. But you need to let go of that and remember that a healthy body and healthy mindset is the most important!

Personally i dont think it is so much the attention aspect of it making you hold onto your eating disorder, but much more and underlying issues as well. So i would try to get to the root of those issues and try to solve them and then it is easier to let go.

Maybe not the best advice but i hope it helps a little anyway :)

Hi Izzy - you have a really healthy appetite and love of food and I wondered how long post recovery it was before you achieved this. That is it became your choice to eat that amount rather than having to be told? Or was it a case that you just developed a natural appetite because you were healthy and weight restored?

My body adapted to my meal plan which was 6 meals and around 3000-4000kcal (never counted how much). So naturally i felt hungry for those 6 meals and similar portion sizes. However how much and when and what i eat has changed alot over the years since being recovered. I.e i actually eat bigger portions now than in the past and eat differently throughout the day. 
   But it took a few months before my body had adapted and began to feel hunger and fullness feelings around meal times. But then when i relapsed at the start of 2012 and began to restrict and binge and purge again, then it was another process of getting back into balanced and regular eating, but at that time instead of feeling full all the time i felt hungry all the time. So had to eat regular meals to keep me from eating everything in the house, compared to when i had to eat regular meals to actually make me eat.

Your body should adapt to your meal times and you begin to feel hungry and full in connection with those meal times. Give your body some time :)


  1. Thank you, Izzy. Mine were the first two questions -- in terms of "dietary restrictions" I had meant veganism, and it is interesting to hear you say that you don't find it limiting in going out with your friends. I wonder if Sweden is just more used to veganism than some other countries. But it is good to hear that you find it so simple even in those circumstances, and I will think about that too.
    Have a good day.

    1. Yes in Sweden therr are many places that have vegan options. Though I guess in smaller parts of the country there might not be. I guess in that sense I'm lucky because in many countries if a person goes out to eat and is vegan there might not be so many options available. But I guess it's all about supply and demand as well. The demand for vegan food is rising in Sweden and so there is more supply of it. I would just do your best and try to alter the food to make it vegan if possible :) otherwise eat beforehand and maybe get a starter or salad while eating out? Or most places have potatoes or pasta dishes which are vegan :)

  2. On the first one ... I think vegetarianism can be a lifestyle? And veganism can be a diet? Surely it all depends how people practise it?

    1. I think you are right. It depends on the reasons, why you practice the on think or the other.

    2. If you eat a vegan diet you are plant-based. Veganism is about avoiding causing harm to sentient beings when possible so diet, cosmetics, clothes etc are considered.
      A vegetarian diet exploits animals for their milk, eggs, honey etc. So if you avoid animal exploitation through buying synthetics etc but still eat animal products, then it isn't really a lifestyle (because you consciously contribute to their suffering) ?
      Lifestyle = every aspect of life.

    3. This was exactly what I was going to write. If you just eat a vegan diet ypu eat a plant based diet and aren't a vegan as it's just the diet change you have made.

    4. Mainly in response to the anon above Izzy:
      Thank you, it is nice to hear your perspective. But precisely because ethical choices touch EVERY aspect of life, they are messy and complicated, and perfection in all areas at the same time is unlikely to be possible.
      Milk, eggs, honey can be cruel but they aren't necessarily so. And I do think that "consciously contribute to suffering" is quite an extreme perspective on what I think we're talking about.
      Maybe it would be more compelling to frame the vegan lifestyle in positive terms rather than in terms of "avoidance"? If a whole lifestyle is built on avoidance, then in itself it is not a flourishing life? I think it would be easy enough to reframe in positive terms.
      I wasn't aware of the vegan vs plant-based linguistic distinction; how widespread is it outside the vegan/plant-based world? Restaurants offer "vegan" options not "plant-based" options, and the distinction sounds a bit like something that only becomes significant among those on the inside of a larger vegan (or vegan-like) community?

    5. You're right, ethical choices can be messy. All I can do is just try to articulate my own perspective :) I don't think it's about perfection, but rather small changes in our daily lives that make a huge difference for the planet. For instance, eating vegan (or plant-based, if we're to make the exact distinction) for a day saves roughly 1100 gallons of water, 40lbs of grain, 20sq feet of forest. Sure, by living in a tent one could save even more; but it is about doing whatever we can in a situation, without it interfering with our lives- unless you devote your life to activism haha. In short, small details all matter :) But of course, as you pointed out, lifestyle should touch every aspect of life, so it's probably impossible to draw a line. So we're left with doing what we can do in that instant :)
      Interesting point about my use of "avoidance" in the previous comment. My best explanation would be that when doing opposite, you don't do its opposite. In other words, by attempting to make someone laugh, you are avoiding making them upset. Similarly in this case, by showing respect to animals' lives, you don't want to be disrespecting them. And I agree, I could've easily rephrased it, because "avoidance" doesn't really connote positivity.
      Personally I see using animals and taking away their breast milk, produce, unfertilized eggs (which they can eat for calcium they lost) as cruel. Moreover it is very unhealthy and exhausting for them. Also, with demand so large, extreme measures have to be taken to provide those products for the market.
      On your last point, I don't think it's a widely known distinction, although it is becoming more well-known. It's mostly made by those that know that animals are hurt not only for food but cosmetics, clothes etc as well. I guess it's a bit like with books: for most, a book is a book, but some may differentiate between autobiography, fiction and so on.
      Just remember, these are my opinions, what others think may vary a lot :)

    6. Thank you :)

  3. Vegetarianism is a lifestyle not a diet...
    I have always been a vegetarian and not because of I think this is the healthiest way of eating. I always wanted to be a vegan but the country I live in is really poor and doesn't offer that much vegan options... as well as when I tried to eat only vegan foods I felt dizzy and tired all the time and my hair fell out even if I ate lots of legumes, complex carbs, etc. So I think veganism is not for everyone. But I still try to do my best.