Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Friday, August 5, 2016

Answers about my job - stories, what i do etc

Great that you are feeling happy within yourself and having a good day. If you get the chance could you post more about what your job is like? like what your colleagues are like, what you actually do, any funny scenarios, what its like dealing with the public all the time and if you`ve made any friends? I know you love what you`re` doing - I`m just interested!

To start off, i work in a rather big food store and my main job is sitting at the cashier. And you would think it is just 8 hours of sitting but that is certainly not the case for me. As i wrote in my personal letter, i am someone who is energetic and likes to do things so i dont just sit behind the cashier. I have also found that ergonomically sitting wasnt so beneficial for me because i was doing the same movement over and over and i sort of strained/pulled a muscle in my back which lasted for a week, so i vary between sitting and standing at the cashier and also vary which cashier i sit at so that i dont just do the same movement for hours on end. Apart from being at the cashier and scanning items as well as knowing all the different codes for fruit/vegetables/bread etc i also stack and move the shopping baskets to the front of the store as well as sort of "clean up" the items around the cashiers.
  And then there is also a self scanning part of the store which i also spend some time working at. And when i work at that part then it is alot of movement and standing and walking and moving as i help customers and also at times we take customers with huge trolleys of food from the queues and we scan the items with a self scanner - to minimize the queues. I personally dont like working in the self scanning part of the store because it is alot more stressful as well as when i have to scan the items it isnt so ergonomical the movements done - but it is nice to vary work shifts as well.

What are my collegues like? Most of them are very nice, though its mostly just the "hi, how are you etc" conversations as there isnt much time to talk. We all have breaks at different times so my breaks are spent on my own, which is fine... because during my breaks i just want to sit and drink coffee, eat and use my phone, hahaha. There are one or two who arent so nice... maybe they are just over worked or dont like summer workers, not so sure... or maybe they are just bitter people, but i dont let them bring me down. Whatever their negative energy is about, i dont let it affect me!!

Somedays there are barely any customers, and other times it is basically 8 hours of none stop people. Though there are usually huge rushes of people at 11-13 and 15-17 and then again at 18. So i basically know that at those times it will just be none stop people and long queues. I prefer it that way though, the time goes quicker when there are many people. 

Usually my energy is on top and i smile and say hi to everyone and am friendly, though at times my energy can dip and i can get very irritated at people. For example if a customer/customers have been very rude to me or even at times - down right mean, then it can be hard to just smile again, and instead it takes me like 5-10 minutes to recover before i can begin to be positive again, haha. And certain customers are just sort of "irritating" in their behaviour/manor and it is hard to explain, but some people just irritate you for no reason at all... and then i have to try to smile while not letting that irritation get to me, hahaha.

Somedays are super stressful and at times there are huge queues of people, collegues ringing on the phone and people trying to talk to me from behind my back/by my side and at the same time i have to try to scan the items and not double scan them!! 

Most often at work i just sort of zone out in a way, it is just the same thing over and over and i dont really think... i just do. A bit like people say when they go for long car drives and it is like they wake up half way and realise they have no memory of the past 2 hours of driving. Like at times i worry that i have made loads of mistakes because i havent been so present - just sort of doing the tasks/scanning/putting in the codes etc. A little scary at times!

Ii feel like i could write so much about my work etc but instead i will end with a few stores from my work, hahaha.

1) A few days a go i had a customer who was so incredibly rude to me, almost shocking, and then when i was going to give her her receipt i saw she had a fly stuck in her hair... i wasnt so sure if i should tell her or not, but as there was a queue behind and i didnt want to embarass her i didnt say anything. But i thought "thats karma", hahaha.

2) I once had a customer call me a bitch because he didnt get any discounts - but that was because he didnt buy any items that had discounts, hahaha. The queue behind him were all shocked when that happened, i didnt quite know how to respond.

3) I dont usually care or notice what people buy, but there was a customer who bought bread for 150 euro - i was a little confused over that, hahaa.

4) Yesterday a customer bought a package of sugar but it was open so i ended up with sugar over the whole cashier and on the floor and the "food band" (? what is the name for it, hahah). So it was just to find the hoover and start hoovering.

5) During the first weeks of working there came a man at around 8.30pm and bought a package of bread and paid with a 100euro note - which is rather rare that it happens, and there have been cases of people faking 100 euro notes (i.e 1000kr). And i was a little worried about accepting that huge sum when his item only cost roughly 2 euro. After asking him if he had any smaller change and he replied with no, i then had to ask another collegue to make sure that the 100 euro note was real before then accepting it. But it definitely felt a little strange...

6)The store closes at 9pm and one evening at 8.50pm there came 6 huge trolleys filled with food and there were only 2 of us working and so we didnt get to clean up and go until around 9.15pm and then it was all the "after work" things such as moving trolleys, counting, cleaning etc which had to be done so i didnt leave until about 21.45. Both me and the other guy working felt a little irritated over those customers who could have planned better, ahahhaha.

7) And finally... one "story" which makes me feel so incredibly ashamed and embarrassed. A man paid for his items and then when i was going to give him his cash back the money ended up falling on the floor below the cashier and so i picked up the 20kr note and gave it to him with the rest of the cash and he walked away, only to come back to minutes and say that he hadnt recieved all the money back. So i looked at the receipt, looked at the money he had recieved back and told him he had gotten the right change back and he kept saying no... and i was like yes, you have gotten enough change back. Only to then count again and realise that a 50kr note was missing and he was right. So i then looked under the cashier and found the 50kr note lying there and gave it to him and apologized sincerely and after that i just wanted to sit under the cashier and hide for a while. Because it most probably looked like i had tried stealing the money, and then to stand there and tell him he had recieved the right money back when he hadnt.... "like i have no math skills at all". It was definitely not a good point in my life and i felt super embarrassed... but i hadnt noticed the 50kr lying there at all, i just gave the money back i had found - but of course i am sure it didnt look that way from the outside, hahaha.


  1. fun post! thank you, Izzy.
    on the last one - I am sorry you felt so bad, but honestly, I wouldn't worry. I wouldn't have thought things that you think that people on the outside would think, and worrying about what things "probably look like" to other people is a recipe for making oneself unhappy in ways that lead us a long astray x
    On the 100 eur for a loaf of bread -- it could just be what a cash machine dispensed to him, and he went to a big store so that he could have change that is more useful for daily life?
    you sound like a really good person to have as an employee / colleague / staff! :)

  2. Hey Izzy! Can you post your recipe for homemade bread? Thank you :)

  3. Thanks for sharing this Izzy! I had to smile about the incident with the customer with the fly in her hair - I wouldn't have told her either :)
    I`m glad you find your job enjoyable though. I guess your "people skills" have really grown these past few weeks having to deal with the public as you do, it must be difficult at times.
    So you could say your summer job has been a success - do you think they will take you on again for your next break from uni or will you be looking at getting something where you are studying rather than back at home? Here the stores seem to keep their seasonal staff and I have often seen the same faces reappear when unis/colleges break for Christmas/summer etc. It would be nice to know if you could work there again when you`re on a break.
    Will you miss it when you leave or are you just glad for having the opportunity to work and the experience?

  4. Ok, now I am interested: how do you call someone 'a bitch' in Swedish? I swear to not take advantage of that information by my own actions, but, well, I'm just a curious little thing.