Life without Anorexia
My motto is 'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'
I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.
I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.
I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.
I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at: firstname.lastname@example.org
Sunday, July 24, 2016
6am workshift, surviving the day and pizza dinner with my family
First off i want to start off by saying thank you to everyone who has reached out to me via comments, emails, messenger and even on snapchat and has tried to give me advice or just reassure me that i will feel better. And i know i will, everything gets easier over time and doing things i enjoy is one way to make things feel better!
Today, Sunday.... though i havent really understood that it is Sunday. I was awake at 4am as i started my workshift at 6am this morning and needed to leave the house at 5am to make it in time.
Today was my first day working on the "floor" i.e unpacking products and filling the shelves and i can say... it was tough work. The first 2,5 hours i was like a zombie but then i ate breakfast at work and the next few hours went by fast, but i must say it was very tiring. And it wasnt until i finished my workshift that i realised how active i had been during my hours at work but also just how tired i felt.
It is funny how when i applied for work i wanted to be on the floor and to stack shelves, but now i am so thankful that i got the cashier work as i enjoy that so much more. It's fun and stressful and there are rude customers at times, but once you get into it, it is actually super fun. And i missed sitting in the cashier while i was working on the floor today, hahaha.
After my workshift it was just to head home and rest up and eat food before i then began preparing cake and dinner for family as we were celebrating my step dads birthday.
On the menu was pizza and for dessert a chocolate cake with lots of different chocolate and some vanilla tofu ice cream for me! I wasnt super excited to bake using eggs and butter but that was the ingredients i had at home and i felt like... "the ingredients are already bough so might as well use them" but i would have prefered to make a vegan chocolate cake so that atleast i would have been able to eat it. But there was tofu ice cream anyway!
Otherwise, it has been nice to spend some time with my family and to have a lovely dinner together. But also i have had a few conversations with my mum and dared to open up more recently and it feels strange... so strange, but it is also kind of nice. To just sit and talk... like therapy i guess. Maybe therapy isnt completely out of the question... because when i let my guard down then i can really begin talking. But it is just that 99.9% of the time i have walls around me and my guard up and i dont dare say anything, but then at times i let those walls down and i can just talk.... i guess its about who i feel comfortable with as well. Anyway...
Also a note - dont comment on my weight in the pictures of me. I am aware of how i look, please dont mention it.
(My snack when i got home soya yoghurt, fruit, watermelon and had a few scoops of ice cream just because i could, hahaha. P.s we had two pakets of ice cream at home)