Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Friday, June 17, 2016

Dont judge people by their size

Something which bothers me very much is how judgemental people are...most people seem to do it. You see someone overweight and start thinking thoughts like 'they should go on a diet' ' they need to lose weight' etc or you see someone very skinny and think 'they need to eat a burger' 'they're too skinny, thats not pretty' or 'they have anorexia'.

And all these types of thoughts really bother me... i think its so wrong. When i was sick, i would stare at everyone elses bodies. I saw everything good about everyone elses bodies, but at the same time i was a very good critic. I feel awful admitting this, i feel so ashamed of myself, but i had thoughts like 'i would not want to look like him/her' or 'im so glad i dont have thier body'.
   And now i just feel awful that i thought those thoughts....To judge someone, merely by their size, that is WRONG.

In society there is so much fat shaming and skinny shaming but at the same time society has these unwritten rules or this ideal set up for men and women. How we should look to be perfect and accepted and everyone else i.e 95% of the population that doesnt look like that gets critic, made to feel like crap.

I know longer judge people, not by their size or weight anyway. Especially not strnagers, i dont know anything about them..... how do i know if that man has just spent 2 hours at the gym and is now going to get lunch. Or if that girl who looks skinny has just eaten McDonalds for lunch etcetc
Something which i find is that people are so quick to judge others... not really caring about who the person is. Most of it is mental thoughts, thoughts that cross your mind when you see a person, but others voice their thoughts. And its happend numerous times where a friend or family might say something about someone else and it irritates me. I mean how would it feel if you knew that strangers were saying things like wow, she should lose weight. Or, That dress is NOT flattering on her, what was she thinking.  etc
   I like to think - dont treat others how you wouldnt want to be treated yourself.

Also what i find is that society tells us that the leanest and skinniest people are the healthiest and i KNOW that that is not true. Many skinny people use unhealthy methods to look that way and some people who are naturally skinny eat like crap everyday just because they can. They know they are skinny and so continue to drink 2l coke everyday and McDonalds for lunch and no one says anything about it. Infact they are told they are doing a good job for 'trying to gain weight'. But if you see someone who is overweight drinking coke they get chastisized and told they shouldnt be drinking that..... just based on their weight? They might have diabetes and low blood sugar and need something sugary... or maybe they just want the drink?

Skinny people are often seen to be healthiest, but infact there are people who are curviers/bigger who are alot more healthy than someone who is smaller than them. Those people they can run a marathon, they eat a very healthy diet. Yet they are judged and deemed unhealthy merely on their size...

Well losing weight doesnt happen over a night, it can take year(s) for someone to reach thier healthy weight, they can be fighting everyday to lose weight. It doesnt just magically disappear, so who is to say that people who are bigger are unhealthy... they could be trying to change that.

Just like with people who are skinny... often too skinny people get told that they dont look good, they need to get some meat on their bones... but they could be eating copious amounts each and everyday, trying to see the scale go up but nothing seems to happen and it is down right rude to tell someone that they need to eat a cheeseburger. Ive been told that once before.... and it was only a month or so ago? I am a perfectly healthy weight, im not underweight and dont look underweight, but also... its nobody elses business.

I think we should all start making conscious efforts to stop judging people based on their size or weight. You know nothing about the person... they could be really happy in their body - infact, people who judge, comment and critique other peoples bodies often arent happy in their own. (So think about that for a while!). Someone else could be really happy in their body and just because its not your ideal doesnt mean it isnt theirs.
    Everyone is different, has different body sizes, different goals in life and remember that change takes time. You dont know how that person could look a year from now.

(***I want to make a side note, please dont take this post and start thinking... well then i can stay underweight because its nobody elses business. That is not what im talking about, what im talking about is judging other people based on size.... just like nobody should judge you if you are underweight or overweight. I think its wrong!!!)


  1. i did this when i was at my worst too! i probably would have looked at me now and felt smug that i didn't look like that--and im thin still, just not underweight.

    what i hate the most is how, when a skinny person doesn't eat, everyone cares. but when a fat person doesn't eat, people congratulate them. it makes it so hard for people to get help with EDs if they don't "look" like they're starving

    1. I know it's tough but hopefully you think different now? And can see how beautiful you are?

      And regarding the last bit, I hate that as well. Eating disorders aren't a size but people seem to think that only thin people can have eating disorders and that makes it so much harder for those who are normal weight or over weight to admit they have an eating disorder and to ask for help. But hopefully society will change and realise that eating disorders aren't a size.

  2. Unfortunately, my parents are always making comments on people's appearance, not just based on their weight, which is weird because in theoretical questions they are quite open minded. But it just bothers me how I'm trying to concentrate on positive things, finding a healthy mindset, and then they just speak up and point someone out whose appearence they don't like, and I feel like my appearence is never good or them either

    1. Have you tried talking to them about it?
      ... even if so, unfortunately people do say unhelpful things ... we have to learn to cling to what we deeply know and believe is right, whether or not the people around us affirm it
      take care, and good luck with developing a healthy, happy way of being X

    2. I know how that feels. My family were the same when I was in recovery and I found it triggering but I talked to them about it and said that they should refrain from commenting avout other people's appearance in general but most importantly not do it around me. And they did stop mostly when I talked to them about it. But also if they ever commented something negative about someone's appearance I would then start saying positive things about the persons appearance and that helped me to see the beauty in everyone and not allow others to judge strangers just on their appearance.
      .Focus on your thoughts and keeping them positive and being the positive and non judgemental role model :)

    3. I'll try, thanks for both of you :)