Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Thursday, April 28, 2016

What happens when you fuel your body properly and nourish it right?

Your brain gets the energy it needs.
Your cells and organs function to the best of their ability.
Your hair grows and your nails get stronger as well as your bones.
Your skin is usually less dry when you eat properly (and get enough water).
You have more energy.
Easier to sleep at night when you get the right nourishment and fuel i.e not super hungry or extremely full which can prohibit sleep.
Stronger physically and mentally.
More capable of doing things. Both work and fun stuff.
Better concentration and focus.
A happier body and better functioning body.

Of course there are other things that can play a role such as other physical illnesses or disabilities or other mental illnesses. But generally speaking eating the right amount and right nourishing food makes you feel so much better physically and mentally. So why not eat properly when there are so many benefits?

I know your meal plan may feel daunting or you feel you don't deserve or haven't earned to eat, but that's not true. Your meal plan is there to help you, and you always deserve food! Feed your body right and it will thank you.

You can't live a whole and full life if you are walking around starving and empty or have your thoughts constantly on food.


  1. [trigger warning]

    I come from an emotionally abusive household and they have been denying me medical treatment for years, no matter how many times I ask for help... Because I had no choice and was desperate, I tried to start recovering on my own, I set up a meal plan, put myself in exercise restriction, started to fight negative thoughts with positive ones etc. I noticed good changes from the very first days and I was happy. I don't want to die. But then my family started to make horrible, horrible comments when I was bloated, and I started severely restricting again... I have no one to turn to and have other mental health issues too, I cant get help by myself. I want to follow my new meal plan because it was working. My BMI in February was 13.78 and my body image is simply ridiculous, and they refuse to take me to the doctor. Any family would have done something already! I feel like a fraud because I dont have a diagnosis and I get desperate when I think that if I recover without a professional now, I'll never be able to talk about it to anyone, and no one would take me seriously, because not even my own family seems to take me seriously I'm sick, so no one would ever believe I went through this once I get healthy... I really want to recover, I'm so scared of dying, but the more they say I'm dramatic and a liar, the more triggered I am to starve myself until they have no option other than seeing me in an ambulance when my heart stops working. And I know that's stupid. I want to get better and be happy and do good things and accept that my intellectual and artistic and empathic skills are worth more than the size of my waist... I just feel so unreal and alone.

    1. I'm not writing to replace Izzy, who I am sure will give an excellent response to this. But firstly I wanted to say that even if I don't know your name or where you live or who you are, I believe you and I believe your struggle. You sound like a strong person in a really hard situation. In terms of getting some kind of support beyond what is possible on the internet -- are you able to ring a free helpline? This is surely exactly the sort of thing they are there for?
      Izzy will say more, I'm sure. Take care.

    2. I second the above. Your struggle is very real, and you don't need the validation of a diagnosis before you start recovering. You already know you are sick. If your family won't help, then advocate for yourself. Make phone calls, find services. There might be free services available if you look. I recovered largely on my own (as I was an adult by the time I made the leap), and it is hard but very possible. I'm sorry you love in an unsupportive, toxic environment. Maybe try to limit your exposure to them. As your recovery and self-acceptance progresses, their opinions will matter less. You will start seeing them with pity, as you yourself become stronger. You are choosing to be a different sort of person from your family. Practical advice could be wearing looser clothing around the house, if they are making unwelcome comments. If they are not going to support you through this, find it elsewhere. Are you in school? A teacher or guidance counselor could help. Good friends. Local support groups. Healthy online recovery forums. Don't let your family's sickness affect your recovery. They are clearly unwell themselves, in some way, and right now that doesn't serve you. Be the example in your house, of self-love, acceptance, strength, integrity, and growth. Stick to your program as if there is no other option. Have pride when you do, despite challenge x, y, or z. Recovery is truly worth it. Your challenges are difficult, but imagine how strong and proud you will feel when you triumph in the end. We can't choose our families, but we can choose who and what else we allow in our lives. Surround yourself with positive people and things outside your family. Recovering is the number one best thing I have EVER done in my life. I love continuing to grow, learn, and change even now. The self-awareness, empathy, and understanding you will gain are amazing gifts that not everyone gets to have. Good luck and stay the course. You CAN do this.

    3. First off i am so sorry to hear about your struggles, but like mentioned above your sturggles are real despite not having a diagnosis. There are many people out there suffering and arent diagnosed and that doesnt make it any less real. And second, thank you to the anonymous who have already answered and helped out . I would suggest maybe calling a hotline or trying to find treatment on your own, unfortunatly family and friends aren't always so supportive and that makes a difficult situation even tougher but you can get through it, you can recover and get better. But the first step is wanting to get better and not allowing the toxic people around you stop you from reaching that goal. Recovery is possible on your own but then you also have to realise that you want to recover and can recover. Is it possible for you to talk to a teacher or someone else in your life that you can trust? Or go see a doctor? Even if your family arent being supportive or think that it is an act or fake, you know yourself. You wouldnt seek help or want to get better if you didnt know that it was a problem. So even if others might not see it as a problem, you know that you are suffering and that it is taking over your life. So my suggestion would be to stick to the exercise restriction, keep following the meal plan, and wear loose clothes like the anonymous above said and also if your family make comments about your appearance or food intake then just challenge them directly and ask them why they made the comment or reply with the same comment back. Or just dont say anything and dont let it show that it bothers you, be stronger than those comments. They are unsupportive comments which will stop you from reaching your goal and you dont need those type of comments in your life or in your mind. Maybe have a quote or motto or mantra which you can repeat to yourself each time someone tries to bring you down, critisize you or belittle you? Something which motivates you and reminds you that you are strong and can recover and that your problems arent fake. They are valid and you deserve help and to get better.

      I am sorry that your situation isnt so great and that your family arent supportive, but that just means that you have to be that bit stronger, and you can do it. Look for online help and maybe some type of help outside of your family. And if they are abusive, you do need to talk about it to someone... dont stay in that situation. I dont know how old you are, but there is always someone there to listen and help and it is just about speaking out and knowing that you deserve help and a better situation. So stay strong and keep fighting. You can fight through these tough times.