Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Thursday, April 21, 2016

Waking up early and school work taking over my life

Hello :)

An evening update as usual! At the moment time is just passing by like crazy....   By 6pm today i realised how i had already been awake for more than 12 hours and the time had just passed crazy fast. My day started before 6am, waking up without an alarm. I actually sleep with my blinds open because then in the morning the light shines in and it is much easier to wake up,a nd the days where i am super tired and dont want to get up the light doesnt bother me anyway... but its a technique i have found helps me to wake up and feel more energized in the morning... when i wake up with the sun shining into my room! Of course i can only do this because my window is facing into the forest and also i am not on the first floor, so no one can see into my room... and then in stockholm i do the same thing as well as we live on the 16th floor so no one can see into my room!!

I started my day with a walk followed by pancakes and job searching online... or well, sending in my CV and writing job aplications, and then when i am in Stockholm (tomorrow) i will try to go to some stores and leave my CV as it is much better than to just send in a CV as that can end up being unread or just forgotten about. Though some stores want a personal letter, and the personal letter needs to be adapted for all the different stores i want to apply to... and i just dont have the time to write one, so i am going to try my best with just my CV and hope that i get a summer job somewhere. Though i have been told that i can live until the start of August in the apartment i live in now, so i am considering applying for work where i live now, but then i definitely need an everyday job to afford rent and food without any loans during summer... so i'll see what happens and where i will be!

After that it was off to the gym, where i finally had a great workout even if i didnt do so much - my body is feeling tired and heavy even if i physically have energy, its only about 80% of my normal energy levels so i took it easy, but it was still very effective which always feels good. And then it was just to go to the nearest library and sit there for the next 5 hours and work through my pile of stuff.... and after those 5 hours i only got through 2 powerpoints (with roughly 40 slides in total) & a few chapters of my metabolism compendium, so it was productive... but at the same time it was barely scratching the top off of my school work. So that is my priority at the moment... all my school work and studying and rest and trying to sort out a job, and then everything else falls behind those prioritites. I guess i cant forget happiness as a top priority, but being productive is a way to limit my stress and that makes it easier to feel happy when i dont feel as stressed, but then again i feel that pressure of never doing enough or being good enough which then adds stress, so its just one complicated, messy cycle.... like a messy relationship, haha.

But thats life at the moment. Its not always easy or fun, but i have made plans with my boyfriend to go out for dinner during the weekend and if its good weather go to a bar and sit outside with a glass of wine (or wine for me, i guess he'll drink beer!). Or well, i dont really feel like drinking alcohol at the moment... 2 weeks ago i wanted to just sit at an outside bar and drink a glass of wine, but wasnt able to then... and well now, it feels like drinking wouldnt be so beneficial to my mental state and not good for my CF care/medication either... but i mean a cola zero or something, hahahhaha XD

I want to thank you all for the comments you have left on my blog recently, and answering questions as such, it makes me so happy to read them, and i promise to answer once i get some time over :) I love when you participate and share things on here, i love the interaction... though i know i have to reply and interact back as well, hahaha!! :)

Also i was thinking i might make a vlog or video someday, i just got to think of some topic to talk about... or have a day where i do things so i can make a vlog, but that would also mean having a good video editing site/program and i dont have that, so ill see if this idea even leads anywhere! For now i think ill make some eggs with crisp bread for a night snack (my new obsession!! Eggs with extra egg whites, crisp bread or rice cakes with butter and the fried eggs (with a runny yolk) on top! Mmmmmmmm)

^^Just some photos which i can relate to!! XD


  1. hi, I really thank you for the amazing things you put up every day. They really have let me know that I'm not alone.

    I was wondering if you could share how you kept your mind focused on recovery, because no matter how hard I'm trying it's very difficult for me to make sure I get as many calories as I need. I really am interesting in fitness and heath and I want to get heathy so I can get back to cycling and take it to the next level with a team. I know I have to get heathy first, but I have a good mind set one moment, then it wanders off again. It's not so much being fit again. I'm just so scared that I will fall back into the same place. If you have any tips to share that would be great.

    Thank you

  2. Hi Izzy! I really love your blog and you're helping me love myself more and more each day. I have a question about hair. Your hair is very beautiful, how did you deal with hair damage from anorexia? I have a lot of hair splitting along the strands, not only at the ends. Before I had my ED I had such beautiful thick hair. Now I'm doing a lot better, but my hair worries me. Do I need to shave it all off or something, do I need to cut half of it off, what should I do? How did your hair act during/after anorexia? Thanks girl and keep doing you, you're a wonderful person :) x

  3. Hope your job searching goes well for you - what sort of job would you like to get for the summer?
    Your weekend plans sound great - something you can look forward to after all that studying you have been doing.
    Have a lovely weekend and enjoy that drink!