Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Sunday, March 20, 2016

How I'm feeling at the moment

The truth.

The truth is that right now I don't feel so great at all. Feeling a little lost within myself and feeling detached from most things in my life. Feeling the anxiety, the unmotivatedness and the tiredness kicking in. Isolating myself and not wanting to be around people. If I'm honest, being at home triggered something within me... and I'm not quite sure what or why. it's hard to write this as it's nothing my family has done, I think it's just me and myself...  but it was a relief to get back to my apartment. I don't know whether it is because I have my routines and habits here or because I am on my own or what it is...  but it felt good anyway but at the same time I feel so alone at the moment. I don't feel like I can talk to my family, I don't want to talk to my boyfriend and just feel like I don't know who to turn to....

I don't really know why I'm posting this. But I felt i needed to write my thoughts out and be honest about the fact that I'm not feeling 100% .  But I'm going to work on trying to make things feel better again. But for now this is how I feel. I guess the first thing is to realise how I feel and then try to change it and also figure out why I feel the way I do.  Anyway. ... I guess that's all I had to write for now.


  1. Firstly, I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so crappy. Secondly, know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I often feel like this whenever I've been away from home and have come back and the same thing with my sister when she comes home from university for the holidays. I think there's this whole excitement about being away from home and in your own space. It gives you the chance to nest aka settle down into your own personalised space and then you leave that. University is also where it's about you and there is a lot of thinking and progressing towards the future. But then when you come home, it's like you're taking all these steps backward- into the past and it feels like you're regressing. Its exhausting- speeding up into the future and then pausing and going back because in a way you have to change to adjust yourself to the environment you're in and when you're not even sure who you are or what you want to be, then having to adjust this is even more confusing and demanding of time which makes one frustrated and exhausted. Just remember that you might not know what you want to be, but at least you know the kind of person you want to be. And that's pretty good for your age xxx But I hope the grey cloud above your head lists and disappears. It's never a fun feeling while it lasts

  2. Please seek help!! You won't regret it :)

  3. Sorry you're not feeling so great right now Izzy. :-(
    I agree with Teagan, I'm the same when going back and forth between home and uni. I SO look forward to going home, but then when I get there, having spent so much time suiting myself, getting into the groove of my own routine, to suddenly have to readjust to everyone else is really difficult and anxiety-provoking.

    It's great that you have posted this and got your true feelings out. You write so many posts to help others and inspire positivity, so it's important that you can open up about not feeling so good yourself. Whether we can help or not, you have readers that care. :-)

  4. Hi Izzy, sorry to read that you are feeling so out of sorts right now. in my personal opinion I would say you would be better off at the moment at home with your family - if are are shutting yourself off from people that is not a good sign and the fact that you say you feel so alone for having left and gone back to your apartment confounds this. You are struggling with your CF at the moment and that is bound to make you feel low. Why not stay at home with your family and let your mum take care of you? You don`t need the extra pressures and responsibilities of living on your own as well as dealing with your health issues right now. I wish there was something I could do to make things ok for you, but I think you really should think about having company and someone to care for you right now.
    Please think about it. (())