Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Monday, February 29, 2016

Wanting to eat intuitively but having stoamch pain/intolerances/allergies

I thought this topic: Wanting to eat intuitively but having stoamch pain/intolerances/allergies  was important to write about because of all my recent stomach pain and all the new guidelines i have been told to follow.

I believe that intuitive eating is best and that following diets or counting calories or macros is a waste of time. Of course eating intuitively shouldnt mean overeating or undereating everyday, but being able to listen to your body and eat the right foods for your body and your healthy but also knowing that a treat here and there is nothing to feel anxious over. Eating intuitively should be sort of "free" and not so much thought about eating.

But recently i have been given alot of guidelines of what to eat and how to eat and sort of takes the intuitive away from it. Not eating big meals, not eating certain foods, not eating at certain times, not being able to eat some favourite foods etc etc and it definitely isnt fun for me. Though it takes my stomach pain away so it is worth it. 

However what i wanted to write about is that, if i was given all these guidelines and rules (well not really, i always have a choice over what i want to eat), and had to think more about what i eat, after recovery i dont know how well it would have gone.I know many people develop a sort of fear of certain foods if they get alot of stomach pain or other pain from the food, which isnt strange... i mean who wants to eat something that gives them pain? But i dont have that fear, i know that i can eat all types of food... just that some food will leave me in alot of pain, but i can still eat them and deal with the consequences. But i dont know how i would have done or whether i would have truly recovered from my eating disorder if i had to constantly think about all the things i think about now...then it would still have been so many rules regarding eating and what i can and cant eat. And recovery from an eating disorder is about taking the focus away from food, finding other things in your life to focus on... but that is not always the case.

For example if you have food allergies or intolerances, then you do have to think about that or if you have thing such as IBS, gastritis or just a sensitive stomach. But you learn to deal with it and suddenly it wont be such a big deal, but in the beginning when you need to make all the changes it puts alot of focus on food.

I can say that if i had all this pain and given all these guidlines during recovery or after recovery it would have made it alot harder to eat intuitively, because often i feel nauseous and not hungry and most likely would not have eaten, but now atleast i know better and know i need to eat even if i dont feel so hungry. But also, those years i learnt to find balance and find peace and moderation with all types of food. Not have the black or white thinking and be able to face fear foods, i was able to take the focus away from food and eat because my body needed it and because i enjoyed it.

Though that can still be done even if you have certain stomach problems, it just means that you need to learn what your body feels best from and what might cause pain, and even if that might take some time, it is fully possible to eat intuitvely - within the foodrange that you can eat - and also to not have food as a main focus. I mean just a few years ago if you had celiac or were lactos intolerant then it was almost impossible to find gluten free foods or lactose free food, but now in Sweden anyway there is a wide range of both types and so many products as well as in restaurants and cafes they can often make gluten free or lactose free options. And that makes eating and daily life so much easier for those who have those allergies/intolerances.  But also now there are many different types of medications that can help for dfferent problems.

It is important to know that in recovery there will be alot of bloating and some dicsomfort and fullness feelings, but they should pass after a few weeks/months. After a while those things shouldnt be a problem, but if those things continue for a very very long time and you can connect the pain or discomfort with certain foods then you can get it checked out. The hard thing though when recovering is knowing whether its justnormal bloating and your bodies digestion system trying to adapt or whether it is an actual problem/food intolerance. But that is something you will figure out eventually hopefully!

Having stomach pain is a discomfort but it can be sorted out and it wont be that way forever, just dont stop eating. .Instead find what works for your body and your stomach, but dont make food your whole focus either.  Instead try to connect the dots and find what works best for your body and once you have done that it is much easier to be able to eat freely (with what you can eat) and not have food as a huge focus.

I know this post is a bit of a mess, because i sort of lost my trail of thoughts half way..... but if you have any advice or been through something similar then comment below and maybe give advice to others who might be struggling or such!


  1. you are a great example, Izzy
    I really hope your stomach problems will get better and you will have freedom to enjoy again
    have a good day

  2. I`m going through the process of elimination due to intolerances at the moment and I can honestly say that when I first got the results I panicked, it was so overwhelming the thought that just when I had started to eat more "normally" I was forced to restrict. But I got over it. I cleared my cupboards and fridge of all the banned foods and brought replacements (where possible) of the foods I could have instead. And its got easier to deal with just doing that. I`m adapting to the new foods, finding brands I like over others and just getting on with it. It is frustrating when I can`t replace a certain food but I have just had to make do and come to terms with it. And I`m beginning to feel better, so it has been worth it and hopefully will continue to get even better from here on. I don`t miss the feeling unwell all the time so have no desire to back track and eat certain foods even though I know I shouldn't. It has been challenging experimenting with new foods and new flavours, cooking my own food from scratch because that is mostly the only thing I can do now as so many common ingrediants in shop brought food are out of bounds. I won`t say that at some point I won`t find this tiresome, or even regret not being able to eat certain foods but at the moment I am fine and just getting on with the change. Actually doing something rather than just sitting here panicking about it helped me. I cannot change what is but I can change how I feel, so that's what I aimed for.
    I hope Izzy that your food related condition gets better as time passes and you are not eating the trigger foods. Feeling well and pain free has got to be worth the sacrifice of a favourite food. As for recovery, I hope I will find it easier not having to deal with symptoms, even though I am now having to choose from a somewhat restricted list of foods. I am just viewing it as different, rather than restrictive, than what I was used to before but it is making me feel better.

  3. I've gotta admit, I spent the first 6 weeks of my leave of absence trying to eat intuitively, but running directly into the same stomach issues.
    I didn't put on weight because I was very rarely hungry and terrible at judging 'enough'.

    Since then I've been using a tracking application and food scales to make sure I hit a set calorie goal every day.

    I know this isn't ideal, and I certainly don't want to be doing it in the long term, but right now I feel that physical weight gain is urgent, and I've managed to gain consistently since I started!

    I hope that with weight restoration will come both a recovered digestive system, and a better emotional state, and then I can start focusing on mental recovery.

    That's just my experience though,and as you say it's important to find what works for you! Thanks for bringing this up. :-)