Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Friday, February 12, 2016

Friday update - back in Stockholm

Hello :)

Friday update time, and i should be sitting and studying but the last thing i want to do is study right now so instead i am sitting and eating a snack and writing this blog instead! I did a whole bunch of studying yesterday so i feel that if dont do as much today its not the end of the world... though my test is next Friday. But i am going to dedicate all next week to hours of study, so i am going to try not give myself a hard time if this weekend = not so much study.

Yesterday i was in school until 5pm and got to the apartment by 5.30pm and all day i thought, i dont want to go to Stockholm, my mind was pretty set that i wasnt going to travel to stockholm that evening. But then when i got home i changed my mindset and thought..... "ill get to see my dog on Friday, see my boyfriend this evening and get to go to my normal gym for 3 days in a row." and so within 15 minutes i was out the door and on a bus to the train station where i then had 2 hours travel time to my boyfriend. It was nice to see him again and even if i didnt exactly enjoy being back in Stockholm i didnt let those feelings affect me.

Then this morning when i was on my way to the gym and had passed the place where my sister works, she then calls me and wonders what i am doing because she was on her way to the gym from work. It was the strangest thing because she was literally 30 seconds behind me, so i then had company at the gym!! And it felt so good to be back at my favourite place - my old (not really?) gym, though the workout didnt go so well, far too tired and my intake hasnt been great the past few days so not so much energy, but just being there felt great! And then i travelled back home with my sister and got to see my dog again, who was super happy to see me and she wouldnt stop howling/whining for a full 5 minutes, and then she just stared at me for the next hour!!

Anyway, today im going to try get some studying done and then ill see whether i go to a party with my friends or just have an evening with my family, at the moment i just want to spend time at home and with my dog, just watch a film this evening but who knows..otherwise i will see my friends tomorrow!!

I can say.... i do miss my apartment and just want to jump on a train back there... but i know that its just silly thoughts and that being with family and friends is important!!

 I hope you all have a lovely weekend and a great  Friday :)

And let me know if you have any topic or post requests or questions for me :):)


  1. Awww, I'm so glad you decided to go home for the weekend :). Do you still have your own space there? That could help for future visits, if you know you still have a little bubble available if you need some alone time. For an introvert or a depressed person (or worse, a depressed introvert), the idea of 24/7 family and boyfriend time can be too overwhelming to even bother trying. Enjoy your weekend off from school!

    1. I still have my room at home but there is no bed there at the moment. .. and no furniture either; hahah, but it's still my room XD I'm not here so long so I should manage and csn go for walks or go to the gym or just put on some music/study so I should be ok! And thank you, I hope you have a lovely weekend as well!

  2. I was kind of wondering if you look at the people's stories on your snapchat??? like the one that you talked about on your blog, not your personal one????

    1. I follow loads of people on snapchat so watch all their stories :) but I don't follow everyone who follows me.... but if you follow me and want me to follow you back just email me your snapchat name :)

  3. Aaw your dog is so cute :) question: (ptw) i know you have already written a post about eating slowly and so on, but I wanted to know if you also struggled with it? And my second question is why I lose weight everytime i increase my calories? I'm not at my calorie goal yet but this really confuses me... Wish you a great day!

  4. A question ... but only if you are wanting more questions, not if you have a stack of others to answer already! Universities try to help people with mental health struggles, but it is obviously a major problem for many students and often people don't get the help they need. What do you think universities could do to be as helpful as possible? -- beyond what is already done, I mean. I don't know what is done at your university?

  5. Hey Izzy!!
    I was wondering how you learned to overcome the fear of liquid calories....I'm totally fine drinking water (I love it with a little lemon, as tea, or carbonated) and liquids that have some nutritional value, like milk. But if I were to be offered juice, pop, hot chocolate, milk shakes, etc. my immediate answer would be no. What's the best way to over come those ED thoughts? I've never like pop very much, but I used to love drinking hot chocolate and milkshakes with whipped cream.
    I'm so close to be being fully mentally recovered, but these fears are still weighing me down....
    Thanks so much!!

  6. A question you may have answered before - but how long does uneven weight distribution last? I ask because I`ve been in recovery since October (admittedly with a few relapses inbetween) and I am still finding all my weight is going straight to my stomach. Do you think it is because I haven't managed a consistent time at recovery eating - ie I get ill, don`t eat so much then spend time playing catch up on my meal plan so I`m not eating at meal plan level consistently?
    I am really trying after my most recent relapse when I started to gain and bloat when eating very little, that really scared me. I am not up to full intake yet, increasing every week but still I am bloated and sore. Its really getting to me, I have even been having dreams that I`m pregnant because of the size of my stomach where I am buying maternity clothes, I`m not kidding - these dreams are so realistic i wake up in a daze of whats real and whats not!
    Do you think it would help me, and slow my weight down to a normal weekly increase if I managed to eat consistently for longer periods?
    I am so glad to read that you went home for the weekend and I hope you have a nice time with your family and boyfriend!