Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Sunday, February 7, 2016

Dealing with lonliness and being an introvert

Lonliness and being an introvert - 2 things i know well.

I can be honest about the fact that i have not made any friends in Univserity - and at times i feel a little lonely in class, or a little "outside", but the majority of the time it doesnt bother me. Its not like highschool where you spend 8 hours, 5 days a week with the people in your class. You have several classes a day with the same people and if you sit alone you are "weird". Its different now, so many different people and different programs and courses, people from all over the country have moved to study in the university, some - just like me - have moved to a new town and know nobody. All just tring to settle in and make friends and such. But i know i most probabbly amnt alone in feeling "slightly lonely", i am sure there are others in the class but once the class is over everyone leaves the room and goes their seperate ways. The people who have already made friends leave in groups, others have other things to do and go away.

I was worried i wouldnt make friends, but it doesnt bother me so much now. Because sure i can ask others if i missed something or ask for notes or talk about questions or if we have a group assignment i can work with someone but its all very "acquantince like". So far i dont mind not having "friends" here, because during my lunch break i heat up my food and then sit and work and then on my free days i workout and i study and have other things to do online and such, so i dont feel lonely...  I know i can talk to my boyfriend or family at home, i have my best friend in Ireland and i talk to my friends via facebook daily, so i dont feel lonely.

But i think the fact that i am an introvert makes it harder for me to make friends. I dont jump into groups because i feel like i am being annoying or intruding. I am not the first person to start a conversation, i often wait for others to start talking to me. Of course if i need to ask a question or something ill go up and ask. I smile at people and try to seem "welcoming" but i also know that i have a sort of "resting bitch face" and if i am sitting and thinking or focused on something i guess i can seem a little "bitchy"? Being an introvert and starting a new school isnt easy, if university was like highschool again i would feel sad and most probably feel terrible - living in a new town, no friends. But it doesnt bother me now, but when i first started high school (back in 2012) it took me a few months to make proper friends and during that time i felt so incredbly lonely and sad.... so lonely that i wanted to drop out of school and do online school, but also i turned to exercise to cope and that turned into overdoing exercise and from stress eating too little so ended up with a sort of depression by the end of 2012 (or i think it was more, burnt out rather than a depression. Because once i began eating right and not as much exercise and made friends i felt better. So i think it was "too much", ).

Its tough to be an introvert and trying to make friends, but the best thing you can do is to try to start the conversation, smile at people and dont be scared to talk to people. It's not always easy and i know how incredibly lonely you can feel when you have no friends, when you go to school and see other people laughing, smiling and in groups and you stand alone, eat lunch alone and just feel constantly lonely. But if that is the case, try to start a hobby or go to a group... soemthing that will get you socializing with people and if you have the same interests it is easier to make friends. For example, if there is some type of running group or club i can join in summer i can make friends that way, or if i find soem type of hobby or group/activity which seems fun i might join that and see if i make friends that way... but also, who knows maybe in  month or two i will have made friends in my class, but i am not so worried about it. Because it isnt something that bothers me at the moment, but i guess having friends is always good, haha.

Anyway, i just wanted to write and say that if you are feeling lonely or dont have friends, know that you arent alone. Others feel the same way, but also people are just humans.... you can talk to them, and you arent weird for not having lots of friends or not finding it easy to make friends. Everyone is different and some find it easier and others find it harder to make friends. Its ok, you will make friends sometime!!! :)

Below are some other posts on this topic:

Feeling lonely while going to school
Beginning to socialize again and making friends
Being introverted
Feeling lonely and comparing yourself to others
Living life and being an introvert


  1. Can relate 100%! Im also a huge introvert and sometimes it does get pretty lonely and I worry that I'll get so comfortable being alone (which I think I already am) and not start a family or see friends. I think I like having my own space though; not having to spend so much energy on people or constantly have to think of something worthwhile to talk about. People can be too much for me but I know I need to make more of an effort...

    So glad you got to see daisy! I miss your posts with photos of her! I know how hard it is to leave them behind. Mine stay with my dad too so I miss them every single day!

    Have a lovely week Izzy! :):) ♥

    1. Ohh i know the feeling, sometimes i feel too comfortable on my own and think... how will i ever manage in the future or living with a partner when i enjoy my own time far too much. But i think that in the future we will grow, change and adapt, and when you find someone you really love then you will want to spend time with them... but also they will understand that you need your alone time, so you have the best of both worlds. Someone there for you to spend time with and you dont feel lonely - and someone you want to spend time with, but they will also understand when you just need to be alone for a day or two or longer if needs be. I think its also about making ourselves spend time with others, even if its draining, if we are with the right people then its not so draining and we dont just long to be on our own. So its about finding the right people to spend time with :)

      Ive missed daisy as well, so it was nice to see her :) Leaving animals behind is the hardest - almost, haha.

    2. You are absolutely right when you say when you are with the right people you don`t crave that time on your own, but saying that within any relationship it is also important to have your own space from time to time. I enjoy doing things on my own and also enjoy doing things with my partner, its about creating a healthy balance. Sometimes you just need that "me" time to go off and do some shopping, chill out at home etc without anyone else around. You can love someone dearly but still not want to spend 24/7 with them - that would be too suffocating.
      I`m sure in time you will make new friends at uni, its early days yet. It will happen when you least expect it, you can`t force these things. I`m glad you don`t feel lonely though, you are doing a really hard thing leaving home and starting studying somewhere new and I really admire your strength to do that. I wouldn't blame you for feeling lonely! But it sounds as though you have a good support network outside of uni - family, boyfriend, friend and that's important to have.
      Hope you have a good week ahead with lots of interesting classes - look forward to hearing about them when you have time to write about them. You are doing an amazing job juggling everything you do!