Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Feeling distanced from blogging and things

Hello :)

I'm going to start off by saying that you might have noticed that blog posts are fewer than before, many hours between the posts.  You may have noticed or maybe not... I'm hoping not to be honest.  But the reason for this is because lately I have felt so distant from blogging.... its not as fun as before. I don't have that spark or motivation, but I'm feeling like this in many areas of my life. My relationship included.... I feel so distant from things. Like the excitement and joy and me is separated by a grey cloud. I can't quite find that excitement or spark for things in my life..... I just feel withdrawn from everything. And it is making blogging a little harder when I have 0 motivation to write... but at the same time when I am hit by inspiration I do enjoy writing blog posts and helping but sometimes it feels like a "must" which is just draining.

I thought I would just write that so if any of you have wondered, but I am trying with 3 posts a day anyway and atleast one advice post per day :) hopefully you can understand and bare with me when I try to refind my creativity and spark for things in my life!!

But onto other things, this evening I'm going to meet my friends and go swimming, or something like that.  Apparently there is a pool and maybe jacuzzi at one of my friends apartments so she has invited us over to swim. ... or well, sit in bikinis and talk and apparently there will be alcohol as well. But that just sounds like a bad idea and atleast myself and one or two others aren't planning on drinking which is good... I wouldn't want to be the one not drinking and have to make sure no one does anything stupid! !! :) not feeling totally motivated to leave the house but I know I will enjoy myself somewhat anyway!

As part of my snack this afternoon I tried the combination of celery and peanut butter (and blueberries) and it is actually really delicious.  As long as the celery is "righy" and doesn't just taste of the spray they use and chemicals!!! I managed to eat half a jar of peanut butter while eating my celery XD delicious :)

Do you have any special food combinations you really enjoy? :)


  1. Hey girl ♡ I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I know the feeling. Best thing to do during such times is to rest as much as possible and not overwork yourself or force yourself to do too much. It's best to rest as much as you can and do some relaxing things for yourself. But it's still great that you're not withdrawing entirely and spending time with friends. I hope this cloud passes soon or that you continue seeking out alternative help. Stay strong lovely. ♡

  2. Sorry, if that is too personal, but is there any connection brzween your boyfriend and your depression?
    Don`t know if he reads the blog...but do you really love him, is he rather power-giving or -taking?
    Sorry again, but i ask because my Anorexia has become worse in the 4 years of my relationship, I try to becomr "clear" about a connection...
    Love your blog, always looking forward to read your texts!!

  3. Don´t feel guilty about not blogging. Just take care of yourself<3 You´ll find that sparkle again. Maybe you´ll find inspiration in your new studies?
    I´m actually thinking about finding time for swimming again. I used to do it a lot a few years ago, then I just got bored with it and found new things. But now I feel like swimming as a workout would compliment my other hobbies and goals.
    Celery and pb is so yummy ;) My other obsession is a two egg omelet stuffed with banana slices and spiced with turmeric :) You should try it! Yum!
    Have a relaxing evening and rest of the week! Remember that you can always write me if you feel like it <3


  4. Hey izzy!
    I think its more importent at the moment to take some time for yourself. I can really understand how you feel, and what helps me is that I try to make out the 'root' /origin of my bad feelings or strange. I struggeld with an inner voice that told me I'm never good enough and everything I do isnt enough. Also a strage feeling like anxiety and never ending thoughts about everything (mostly bad). I also felt distand even in my relationship which is actually really good but I coudnt enjoy it. One month ago I quit my birth contol and these strage never-resting-feeling/anxieties slowly go away. But i also work every day on myself and work against negative thoughts. So as a piece of advice: if you feel bad about anything, think aubout the reason and then work against it. And maybe you can talk with your boyfriend:)
    I think you will get better soon because you are so strong!!<3
    Have a nice day :))

  5. You dont have to feel obligated to post every day. It is more than OK to take a brake or post less. Blogging should be something that you enjoy.
    Feel free to do anything you want and never feel guilty about it.

  6. Celery also works well with brie (or similar) and raisins. When I was a small child we used to call it "ants on a log"....
    I'm sorry you are struggling, Izzy, and I really hope you find steady improvement soon. How's searching for a therapist going?
    You are amazing, and you deserve amazingly good in return....

  7. Hi Izzy - please don`t worry about regular posts on here, you are doing all you can and its important that you don`t have any added stress to your life whilst your mood is so low. I`m so sorry that you are finding things so difficult. Please seek professional help before your mood gets even lower - when you start to not enjoy things you did before and you feel that kind of numb and distant feeling is when the alarm bells began to ring for me - I know because I`ve been there too and things can decline pretty quickly once depression gets a grip. Seek help before you sink too low. Can your mum help you find a therapist? Is she aware of how low you have become?
    Please don`t ignore the warning signs and battle on regardless. I`ve been at rock bottom and its not pleasant, so please seek help before its too late.
    Wishing you well and brighter days - you will come out the other side of this.