Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Friday, December 11, 2015

Body comments and body shaming

This post is just me writing out some thoughts so not sure how it will turn out, but I felt that I wanted to write this/share my thoughts.

So yesterday I ended up doing one of those "random next click" on YouTube where you end up seeing lots of random videos which you might not have seen otherwise. Anyway, then I ended up on a video where I guy posted photos of girls and began talking about what he thought about them, how they looked. And just that sort of irritated me.... I mean is it really necessary to make a video where you comment about people's bodies.... but also taking random photos from the Internet. .. that's kind of unfair.  But I mean he's not the only one who does those videos I guess and even those "media/gossip" you tubers like to comment about celebrities bodies and their weight gain and weight loss. I just think the whole thing is unnecessary, as if a random person infront of a cameras opinion should matter. But also so what if a person has gained weight, what should it matter to anyone else? If the person feels better with more weight gain, then that's great. But if they have gained weight from stress or a bad lifestyle well then if they want to make a change they can, but weight changes shouldn't be drastic anyway. Just like when people comment on those who are overweight well 1) weight doesn't say everything. People can be overweight but still be healthy,. There are people who are over weight and run marathons, while there are people who are very slim and eat pizza and chocolate all day. So when people say it's "just that they care about their health" is pretty much a lie. It's just that they think the person needs to lose weight as society has told us that being skinny is what is accepted.

But also, if a person feels healthy and uncomfortable at their weight,  then let them be. (*though please remember, if you are using unhealthy measures to maintain your weight then it's not healthy. *) But also like mentioned above, if someone does want to make a change whether it's going from underweight to a healthy weight, very skinny to more muscles or over weight to normal weight.... All of that takes time. People can be in the process of change and it's not always noticeable. So I think it's awful when people get mean comments about their body when they actually in the process of change, but that change doesn't happen over night. But unfortunately people aren't so smart and seem to make unrelevant comments about everything.  During my last English lesson my teacher told the class, "don't comment about things which a person can't change within 10 seconds". And that is one of the best things I've heard. I mean if someone has food around their mouth, they can change that or if their zipper is down. But you shouldn't exactly go up to someone and be like "your overweight lose 10kg" or "your ugly you should change". I mean those types of comments are mean and unrelevant.... They don't really serve any purpose apart from the person making their opinion heard and trying to bring someone down.

Which brings me to the reason for this post..... The comment section of the video I saw (I watched it all because I was so shocked and sort of grossed out by the man. By what he was saying and how he was objectifying and sexualizing the girls like all they were were objects for him to look at and to please his eye and anything that didn't please his eye wasn't acceptable.... usch, i feel irriated just thinking about what he said). I know you shouldn't look at the comment sections of such videos because in all honesty, the people that have anything good to say often don't comment... its usually those who just want their opinion heard or will write anything that comment.

But the comments actually scared me somewhat,  that that is how people think? There were lots of "gross" "sexy" "looks awful" "looks manly" "needs to lose weight" "looks like a skeleton" etc etc lots of objectifying and sexualizing comments which is something that irritates me extremely. The idea of women just being seen as objects or when certain people think that they can comment about someone's appearance and they everyone will magically change just to suit them.

I understand that we all have opinions and preference, I know that I am not in the majority as I don't judge.... I mean I know my boyfriend is judgemental of people's weight and can comment about people's clothing and size etc which actually makes me a little sad. I think it's so unnecessary,  if that girl wants to wear a too tight top, let her. Or so what if that girl is overweight, it shouldn't matter to you. I don't judge people at all, which is why I find it so strange how some people can be so extremely judgemental. But anyway, like mentioned. ... people have their opinions and preference. I mean we all have a certain type we are attracted to (because you can't deny that ohysical attraction is part of attraction. That in the beginning you usually like how the person looks and then you begin to fall in love with their personality and who they are.) I mean I have a type and most people (not everyone!) Has a type and there is nothing wrong with that. But that doesn't mean that everyone other than your type is ugly or gross or disappear. And even if you have your opinion about certain things it does not always have to be heard. (P.s this is not directed to my readers, this is just me writing my thoughts and to people who think that they can make comments about everything and everyone just because of freedom of speech. ) Sometimes it's best to keep things to yourself.

But many seem to think that just because they sit behind a computer they can comment free as they like, which they can.... but I would like to see some of those people go up to someone and say exactly what they wrote in a comment. See how brave they are then... Some might as they really don't care. But the majority know that they are safe behind a screen and can write exactly what they want.

But it really does scare me at times to see how people think. Body shaming and body comments is a really problem and people don't even understand it.... It can cause lots of problems for people or low insecurity if they ever come across certain comments or videos. I'm not really someone who cares what people think about my body or how I look, the important thing is that I am healthy and happy.  And if someone doesn't like that, we'll that's not even a problem because it's my body and if someone wants to judge me solely on my body then it's them who have the problem and not me.

Anyway, this was a long post but I just needed to write it out. And I really wish people would realise that body shaming and body comments is so unnecessary.  Even on instagram I see it all the time where people freely post their opinion on someone's body and say "well if they posted the picture they are open for critique and opinion"... no maybe, they liked the picture of themselves and wanted to share it, and your opinion is nothing but mean and unnecessary.

Before this post gets super long I'm going to end it here, but I hope rhat someday people begun to realise that certain comments and rude and unnecessary as well as commenting about women(or I guess people in general, it's not just women. ... but when someone objectify someone as if they are just an item which can be used, commented and thrown away) as objects is rude and also unnecessary.

2 comments:

  1. Awesome post! I totally agree about how people (especially men) make really crude comments about others, even those of their own gender at times. it is really painful and it's really rude. it shows more about them than the people they are making the comments about because they are letting their inner personalities show. They know nothing about who the other person is or what they go through, they have no right to tell someone to change. Plus, even if someone tells you to change, that does NOT mean you should listen to them! If someone told me to loose ___ weight or eat more _____, I definitely wouldn't just do it without regards to what I actually think or what my doctors or mom or loved ones believe, but even then it doesn't matter because they don't know what is REALLY happening with you and how YOU feel. Actually, about the men topic... today one of my good friends told me about how a lot of boys at school talk about my body and how I look in an over-sexualizing manor that is disrespectful. And I started to think about how hurtful it is that he didn't stick up for me in those times he shared with me. So, as a note to you all-- always stick up for the persecuted! :) It helps spread the love of body-appreciation!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Awesome post! I totally agree about how people (especially men) make really crude comments about others, even those of their own gender at times. it is really painful and it's really rude. it shows more about them than the people they are making the comments about because they are letting their inner personalities show. They know nothing about who the other person is or what they go through, they have no right to tell someone to change. Plus, even if someone tells you to change, that does NOT mean you should listen to them! If someone told me to loose ___ weight or eat more _____, I definitely wouldn't just do it without regards to what I actually think or what my doctors or mom or loved ones believe, but even then it doesn't matter because they don't know what is REALLY happening with you and how YOU feel. Actually, about the men topic... today one of my good friends told me about how a lot of boys at school talk about my body and how I look in an over-sexualizing manor that is disrespectful. And I started to think about how hurtful it is that he didn't stick up for me in those times he shared with me. So, as a note to you all-- always stick up for the persecuted! :) It helps spread the love of body-appreciation!!!

    ReplyDelete