Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Sunday, November 15, 2015

Saturday and a study reminder

Sunday, usually the day of sleep, rest and study. But today that is not the case.... it is an early morning and work time today.  At the moment i am wondering when i will get to sleep in until 8 or 9am as i have been up from 5-7am each morning the past while. And i guess all my body wants right now is sleep and from my schedule it wont be until Thursday anyway.... so for now, it is just to make do with as many hours as i can get!

Yesterday, Saturday i had a very nice day apart from the stomach ache which progressivly got worse since the morning. I felt how my stomach was beginning to make knots and was painful all over. Just my CF stomach which doesnt want to co operate or work with me and i guess a bit of stress is taking its toll as well. Though it is hard to feel social and energetic when you feel like nauseous and like you will pass out, as well as my body going from extremely warm to extremely cold in a matter of a few seconds. But it was just to bite together and do my best at this point in my life it feels like my family and boyfriend are just used to my stomach messing up or me being low so they cant really tell the difference when i am feeling mentally low or in physical pain and feeling low. Though in a way i guess those two things sort of hang together. But onto my actual day and not just my messed up body.

After breakfast my boyfriend and I went to pick up his sister and after my boyfriend changing the wheels of his car to winter wheels - and me getting in some maths studying - we then headed to a restaurant to meet my sister. As mentioned before, my boyfriends sister works in the area which my sister is studying and interested in so it was a chance for them to talk about that, haha. Then it was a small shopping round where i mostly just sat down as i couldnt stand for too long without feeling uncomfortable and in pain.

Once the mini shopping session - for all of them apart from me - was done the three of us (minus my sister) headed to my boyfriends parents house and ate a super delicious dinner there. I didnt think i would manage to eat so much, but actually... food helped alot. Especially bread, when my stomach begins to knot and feel uncomfortable it's not easy to press food into me and so there food consumption isn't so high, but i think that just makes it worse because eating did help and then eating things like bread seems to help for some reason. But i am not complaining as i love bread :)

So, how to sum up the day.....? A good day,a long day, a day of stomach pain, but feels like that is life at the moment for me anyway. But it was a nice Saturday and there wasnt any stress of not studying though that might be because it feels like the test will go awful whether i study or not, but also i know that i cant focus 200% on studying, that when it comes to days like yesterday i couldnt say no or avoid everyone just to sit infront of a desk and do maths. Life  needs to be lived as well, and i cant let the stress or anxiety of not studying take over because my life does no revolve around studying. It is part of my life, but if things dont go well it is not the end of the world. I cant just exclude social contact and other things in my life because i am studying otherwise when i am 30 i will look back and think, wow.... so much things i said no to or didnt do just because i wanted to sit and study - which at times is exactly what i need to do such as on Monday and Tuesday but i also need to remember to live life and now that life isnt just school and studying.

Just a little reminder for myself and maybe others who struggle with studying and trying to live life at the same time!


  1. love reading about your life, you live it well x
    i do hope you find a way to keep you free from so much stomach pain

    1. Thank you :) for now I don't know what to do... Because it seems to be stress and just my CF stomach :/

  2. Glad to hear you had a good day despite your tummy pain - I hope you are ok now.
    Let us know how your work time went won`t you?

    1. Thank you :) the stomach ache still hasn't passed :/

  3. Hey Izzy, after reading this post I wanted to ask you something: How to combine Recovery and school and studying? I really struggle at the moment with eating because of all the stress... Also my anxiety gets worse because I'm so afraid of failing... School makes me relapse and it's awful :( Do you have any tips?
    Stay strong xo

    1. I have the same problem, it's horrible. whenever i'm stressed, i turn to food :(

    2. I'm going to try write a post about lack of appetite or eating too much due to stress :)

  4. I'm sorry to hear you've had stomach pain today. I do hope you feel better soon and take some time to just relax :)


    1. Thank you. The stomach pain still hasn't passed :/