Im not against anti depressants, i believe that everyone has to make the choice that suits them and i choose to not use them. I have never used them myself, so i dont really know how they will affect me but from what i understand they can make you feel numb where you neither feel happiness or sadness. And i guess at times i would like to just feel numb... to feel nothing, but at the same time i dont think completely shutting off the feelings and trying to "hide" them or run from the problem is going to help me. I much rather need to get to the root of things and face the actual problem, what is is that has caused me to feel this way. Because it is like weeds... sure you can cut off the top of them but eventually they will grow back if you dont pull out their roots.
While i was in Ireland and Mando and was struggling with depression, combined with my eating disorder i took St Johns wort (a herb) which my mum wanted me to take as both her and my dad were aginst anti depressants. Did it cure me from depression, of course not but i dont know how effective it was either as my depression was combined with my eating disorder, but the herb is supposed to help with mild to moderate depression (Source: X ) And i have been thinking about taking it, however i am also on birth control and the herb can effect the absorption and use of birth control so its an "either or", i cant take them both. But i think i want to try to get to the root of things before i begin with medication, and this is MY CHOICE. I dont think any differently of people who use medication, everyone can do what is best for them and i am sure medication can help :)
Any advice on Laxative abuse [that's been long-term] and how to finally get off laxatives for good? I know u haven't had trouble with this yourself -- but it's an unhealthy coping mechanism/ addictive.
I have had some problems with laxative abuse myself but it has never been anything longterm but i know how awful it is to be stuck using them and to also "Overdose" on laxatives. That is one of the worst stomach pains ive been through. I have a post about laxative abuse HERE
But if you have been using laxatives for a long time it can really mess up your bowl system and also your digestive system and so you might actually be dependant on laxatives. But i would suggest cutting down, i dont know how much you use per day/week? But if you can try to cut down and instead add fiber rich food to your diet and if you find that you arent going to the bathroom and you have cut down on laatives then add in crushed pysllium seeds. You mix them with water and it becomes a sort of jelly which some might find repulsive but its just to drink it down and know that it works... or add psyllium seeds to yoghurt or oatmeal or add crushed psyllium seeds to oatmeal (and lots of extra water otherwise it becomes eelly like, but it does increase in volume when you do this).
It's not easy to stop when you have an addiction to something, but try to remember the consequences of laxative abuse and also know that if you are using laxatives to try to "negative the calories" eaten or so they wont be absorped.... that is not how they work. Laxatives dont begin working until the end stages of digestion and by the time food has mostly been absorbed. And if you are doing it for the "empty feeling" well then you need to question the fact why you want to feel "empty" and try to work on that.
If you are dependant on laxatives and you use them because you cant go to the bathroom otherwise, then like mentioned above i would suggest adding fiber rich food into your diet, lots and lots of water (and maybe prunes or prune juice) and maybe some walks and cutting down on laxatives to eventually none... but if you have to just every second or third day. And give it time, when you use laxatives very oten you become dependant on it... but its better to use more "Natural" laxatives if you have to... or preferbly none at all, but your digestive system and bowl system might be a little "slow" and hence need that extra bit of help.
I would also suggest going to a doctor to see if your body is doing ok and taking some blood samples or other tests, just to make sure. Using laxatives too often or too much isnt good. But try to know why you use them... i.e whether its because you think you have to, or you want to negate food eaten or you want an empty feeling... but whatever your reason try to change your thoughts mentally and thenfind healthy ways of coping if you feel anxious or guilty about not using laxatives. But make the choice to change then stick to that choice and even if you slip up, keep trying to stick to that goal!
do you or did you consider ed as you or a separate person? i don't know what to think anymore. if its me then why can't i just let it go?
This one will sound silly, but what is your advice on rumbling stomachs? It's very hard to control it for hours whilst at school. (It doesn't rumble because of emptiness, I've been a healthy weight for two months now). I know restricting isn't an option, but it's more and more tempting because it'd stop it. It's very uncomfortable to not be able to focus and relax because I know it might make loud noise ;/ really silly sorry, but it bothers me so much and causes anxiety.