Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Thursday, September 24, 2015

Negative thoughts lead to a negative spiral

Your thoughts control you. They control how you feel and how you act. That is why it is so important to have positive thoughts, because positive thoughts lead to more positive thoughts and more positivity in general.  But the same goes for negative thoughts... ive realised that one negative though leads to another and leads to another. It becomes like a dark and negative spiral leading you further and further into the darkness. And once you are in that darkness where it is just negativity about everyone and everything it makes it alot harder to change those negatives to positives because the negativity keeps pulling you back. You identify with the negative thoughts... who are you without them? How do you think without that negativity and darkness pulling at you in your mind? Just like with an eating disorder you think you are the eating disorder, you dont know who you are without your eating disorder and whatever you do you feel it tugging you back. The same with dark and black thinking. 

But the first step is to atleast try to think positive, even if its just one positive thought a day, it is one step closer to mostly positive thoughts. On Tuesday after my hospital appointment when i was feeling very low tired and irritated i sat staring out the window from the train and i thought... "Stockholm is a very beautiful city. I like Stockholm alot, the buildings really are beautiful"and just that little thought added a little brightness to my thoughts.... that little positivity was much needed. Even thinking nice thoughts about others, such as "what a nice outfit that girl has" or "what a nice smile that guy has" etc can make you feel a little better on the inside.

With positive thinking i dont think it will solve everything. I seem to get critique from readers who tell me... Positive thinking isnt going to make it better or make me recover from my illness. And yes, you're right. Positive thinking wont magically solve your problems, but it sure as hell wont make things worse. Atleast trying to think positive will either do nothing at all or make things a little brighter, but i doubt that it will make you feel worse or make things worse? THAT is why i believe in positive thinking, because it has the opportunity and chance to make things better. And in all honesty, positivity is so much better than negativity.... i mean have you ever been around really negative people? Its like they drain all your energy... Of course, that could be said for me at the moment with my own negativity, that maybe i walk into a room and just bring the energy and positivity down a notch... who knows. But i believe that everyday you should have some type of positive thought... about yourself, life, others. Atleast try and see if it helps you... not everyday is easy and it might not be possible everyday, but at least try.

Because if you just feed the negative thoughts you will just feel worse and worse.... because how can you think or feel positive when all you do is feed the negative thoughts? Break free from the negative downward spiral of bad thoughts.


  1. i do agree. i just think that it shouldn't stop a person asking for help ...
    please don't be harsh with yourself for your underlying negative feelings (you write here and elsewhere about feeling like you affect others with your negativity), it is NOT your fault and you don't need to protect people from yourself or feel guilty ... people want to help, if you let them. there is a difference between reaching out for help and being negative -- a whole world of difference! :-)
    but of course it is up to you in the end. you write lovely posts and i am glad you are so focused on keeping positive, i agree it can only be a good thing as far as it goes

    1. Oh of course not, i think asking for proffessional help should always be one of the first things you do. With mental illnesses it is not easy to recover on your own, its not impossible, but its easier with support and help.

  2. I always start the day on a positive thought, i suffer from depression as well so thinking positive is hard a lot of the time but i know it's the thing that keeps me going for if i didn't think positively some of the time i may as well just give up. i need to stay positive to fight ed x

    1. Yes exactly, i dont think positive thinking will make everything better, but i dont think it will make things worse. And it keeps the thoughts from always being negative. Stay strong, you can get through this!

    2. bless u izzy thank u xxx u too honey x