Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Sunday, July 5, 2015

Small, repetitive steps each day

Recovering from an eating disorder is about small progresses all the time... taking baby steps forward all the time. Trying to not stand in the same place far too long, because it is easy to get comfortable. To make your habits seem normal, to rationalize your behaviours, to think that you are ok and dont need to keep going. But also to keep repeating the same steps and progresses.

I mean it is great when you try a fear food for the first time, that is a great progress, but its not over there. You dont eat pizza or chocolate or ice cream etc once and think... ive faced a fear food, i dont need to eat it again. Because that is not the case... you need to keep eating that fear food until you no longer fear having to eat it again. Until that food becaomes a normal and ok food to eat. So that if someone suggests you go for pizza or you crave biscuits or want a big bowl of pasta, that is ok. You also need to realise that YOU need to face your fears, overcome your behaviours. It is not enough for someone to tell you that you can do it and that things will be ok, but you need to try it and realise yourself that things will be ok.

I tell all my readers that things will get better, that you wont get fat from not exercising, that you wont get fat from eating chocolate, that it is ok to eat more some dae days... but that isnt enough. It can help you to calm down, but you need to actually try it and realise for yourself. I get alot of emails of people telling me that what i told them was the truth, that the bloating went away, that they learnt ot rest and it didnt kill them or making them gain loads of weight, or that increasing their calories wasnt the end of the world. It might have taken them a while to get the courage to make the change and to try, but once they did they realised that it was ok. And that is what YOU need to do as well, to gather the courage to try and to realise yourself that things will be ok. Or that your fear is not a rational fear.

Make a list of all your fears and your weird behaviour and decide to face 2 (or more) of them each week and keep facing them until they are no longer fears or habits. Try it for yourself, because what is the worst thing that could happen? Try to think rationally.... because the eating disorder thoughts are very irrational.... telling you that eating a pizza will ruin your body or will cause lots of problems, that is not the truth. So try to think rationally and TRY, that is the best thing you can do. Because without trying nothing will change and you wont even know what its like to change if you dont atleast try.

Keep making progress and dont give up or stand still.


  1. I'm having a lot of trouble with this lately... Like, I had some pancakes this morning for the first time in years, but then I think I should skip lunch or have a salad to "make up" for it. I've tried so many "fear foods", but they still worry me.

    It's hard because I've gained 30 lbs in the past year or so, I feel like I'm always bloated, so sometimes I feel like food is the enemy. But sometimes I realize how much better I look and feel than I did before. This blog helps a lot sometimes, really inspirational. :)

    1. Thank you :) I know its tough but you dont need to compensate for eating or for eating your fear foods. Its your mind that is the enemy. Food is not harmful or bad, your body needs food and your body can handle all types of food, i promise you!