Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Friday, July 17, 2015

Recovery/life motivation!!

Note to self (and to anyone reading this): your body cannot change drastically in a few days. Body image may fluctuate quickly and sporadically, but your actual appearance will not. 

We can’t hate ourselves into a version of ourselves we can love.
— Lori Deschene

Recovery does not look like eating a quest bar for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Where is the variety in that, let alone the nutritional value or adequate caloric content?
It also doesn’t look like having exercise as your primary disordered behavior before treatment and then getting out and suddenly becoming a power lifter because #strongnotskinny. You are still using exercise to alter your body, only now it is more socially acceptable.
I also don’t think that recovery looks like eating an entire pint of Ben and Jerry’s every.single.night just because that is what instagram says #anorexiarecovery should look like.
Recovery is living life. It is having fulfilling relationships. It is balance and variety and moderation. It is doing your OWN thing because that feels right. It is being free enough to be spontaneous. It is wearing what you want on any given day. It is laughing. It is picking out a restaurant in 2 minutes instead of 20 minutes and not having to google the menu first. It is having memories of the city and the people and the culture, not the bathrooms in every rest stop or restaurant. It is having enough brain space to think for yourself and the ability to create your own path in life. It is freedom and it is beautiful.

i hope one day you find strength in a healthy weight. i hope one day you smile at your plate and love yourself in the mirror. i hope you tell yourself nice things and i hope you find yourself

Healthy doesn’t mean to just eat salads. It does not mean forcing yourself to the gym when you’d rather stay at home because you had a bad day. It does not mean never eating snacks. It doesn’t mean torturing yourself. To be healthy means that you think about what’s best for you, now and in the future but also DOING WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. Never feel the pressure to do anything that doesn’t bring you happiness. 

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