Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Answers to your comments

I have heard that alcoholic drinks costs a lot in Sweden, how much was that drink for example? Is alcohol sold in the supermarkets or only in a alcohol shop? Just curios about Sweden :)

Yeah alcohol in Sweden is expensive, especially in bars. The one i got cost 126kr (= €12/€13 ) and it was just 4cl (i think). When you go out drinking in bars it costs alot, but as i 99.9% of the time never drink it doesnt bother me so much!!
  In supermarkets alcohol can be bought up to a certain alcohol percent. (Cant remember how much) but its a low alcohol amount, and if you are 18 or older you can buy it in the stores. But for alcohol with a higher alcohol procent you have to go to government run liquor stores where all the alcohol is sold. And there you have to be 20 or older to buy alcohol. I dont think alcohol is so expensive in the liquor stores but im not so sure :) 

A question? Do you think it´s a good thing that the ed treatment has such a long follow up? We don´t have any such... At least that I would know about. At least no one is keeping track of me even if I´ve been inpatient three times. So do you find it good or bad?

I think it is good because it means that if things were to go wrong or i were to relapse i would still have contact with Mando and would be admitted alot easier and get the help needed instead of having to seek help all over again. However, i think its more for their sake than mine. Because once you are declared healthy you never want to end up there again, so when i did start feeling bad again (was declared healthy august 2012) but by November/December 2012 i was depressed again as well as feeling suicidal and struggling to find balance with exercise, but even though i went for a check up at Mando i never actually mentioned how bad i was feeling. Because i didnt want to end up back there again, so in that sense i dont know how helpful the follow up treatment actually is. I mean even while i was at Mando when i filled in the papers and answered questions i never answered honestly and so on some of the questions answered it looks like i was mentally normal and had no problems. But when talking to my case manager she told me that they never fully rely on those questions because it is so easy to lie and withhold the truth.

But the follow up treatment is good because if i were tos ay lose Xkg and end up underweight or maybe end up binging and purging or just overeating and gaining lots of weight, then it could be noticable when i go for a check up. And as i am still a patient at Mando they would have a right to admit me again if necessary. But also if i dont show up for one of the follow up meetings then my case manager can contact my family to make sure if i am ok... because it could be that a person is struggling and relapsed and doesnt want to go for the follow up treatment, but then the case manager can take contact with family to see how the person is doing. However, once you are over the age of 18 you are allowed to legally end the treatment, so i could end the follow up program if i wanted to, but like i mentioned in the beginning. I think its more for Mando's statistics and for research... to show that after 5 years and no relapse the chance of relapse has lessened quite alot. But in the first 1-2 years there is still quite a high chance of relapse, which is true unfortunatly.

I am worried that the others will notice me about my (7 kgs) weight gain. (In the scool, the trainers, the friends, adults, relatives, etc.)
What can I do then? Or will they be notice me at all? Or 7 kilograms weight gain is noticable at all.

Well 7kg might change the body a little but it isnt any huge amount and you need to focus on getting healthier. That the weight you gain will give you energy and health. It will go to muscle, bone, organs and a little fat as well. But 7kg weight gain does NOT mean 7kg fat. Dont worry what others think, focus on your health and that the weight gain is necessary, it is helping you. It is making your body healthier so that it can function properly, so that you can have a functioning body to live life!! I know its tough with weight gain and worrying how your body will change or look, but you cant control those things and it is better to focus on body love and self acceptance rather than trying to change your body or wanting to be the thinnest. Your goal is health, and i am sure friends and family will see that you look much better when you are a healthier weight than when you are underweight. But also when you are a healthier weight you usually look happier, there is a glow and radiance which always looks so much better than the pale, tired and "death like" look you have when you are underweight.

1 comment:

  1. Hi! Just found your blog (actually walked past my therapist, cause I got caught in reading it....). I've been sick with anorexia and unspecified eating disorder for the last ten years, but now decided to take up the last fight for real. Looking forward to follow your journey as well! Keep on fighting!