Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

Translate

Friday, May 15, 2015

Rainy day and maths studying

Sometimes we all need some alone time, to just think, be on our own and enjoy our own company. I am someone who enjoys spending time on my own, i can feel drained of energy when i spend too much time with other people, even my friends and family. I dont feel alone or anti social because i enjoy spending time on my own, i just find it gives me energy and it is something which i like.

My family are away at the moment so i have had the house - and the whole day to myself, which has been much needed. My plans for the day did not turn out the way i had thought. My initial plan was to go to the gym, then go get my hair cut followed by buying the last few items i need for my graduation, the coming home and studying maths as well as finishing on essays.

How my day actually turned out:

Breakfast, long morning run, waffles for lunch, then sat at the table from 11.30am until 4pm where i did some maths work but i took a break every 20 minutes as my concentration just wasnt there. And i did have a little - lie down on my bed for 20 minutes and reenergize - before going back to my books. Then at 4pm i decided that enough was enough.... i wasnt being productive anymore and i was mostly sitting in the chair and thinking as well as getting anxiety over the fact that i wasnt doing maths. When i feel very stressed or feel like i 'have to' do something, it makes me less likely and motivated to do it... (Example, if i plan to do the dishwasher, then my mum comes and tells me to do the dishwasher, there is a 99% chance that it will take me a few hours until i do it, just because i was told that i 'had to' do it!) and thats how it is with maths now. I know i have to study if i want a good grade on my nationals, but i really dont want to. However i have  5 days until my tests, so a little each day.

Otherwise my energy levels are very low today - i blame the weather :) . Feeling anti social and tired and all i want to do is go to bed now (at 5.45pm!), but instead my boyfriend is coming over so i need to muster some energy so that i dont seem rude or mean when really i am just tired and wanting to be alone. Thats the negative thing of enjoying being on my own.... when you feel like others dont understand that and you dont really know how to tell others that you want to be on your own without seeming rude?

Anyway, now i am going to fill up with a little pre dinner snack and coffee and take a powernap or something so that i will hopefully feel more social and energetic then:)

Below is how i have felt today:

^Basically no idea what i am doing, hahahah.

5 comments:

  1. Someone said I'm "normal" and "healthy" looking and I flipped out. Please do a post on dealing with comments PLEASE

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've answered this in a post now which I hope helps you!! <3

      Delete
  2. I know how you feel :/ Have been feeling the same with my studies for the past two weeks. No idea what I'm doing... Haha. Hope it passes sooner rather than later ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I hope you feel more energised real soon! X

    ReplyDelete