Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Friday, May 22, 2015

If you want something to change, then make a change. (thought post)

Friday sadness... and not even sure why.

Spent a little too much time in my own head with my own thoughts. Suddenly feeling like im 'stuck'... thinking about my life, my future. What do i want to do? I know what i want to do... but do i really? Sometimes thinking about studying for the next 5-6 years and working some boring job... it just doesnt feel like a life worth living? Is that all there is.... Of course i know these are silly thoughts. Because there is so much more to life than studying and working, its the small things. Like pancakes for breakfast, evening walks, laughing with friends... doing things you enjoy and noticing the small positive things in life. Thats life, making memories!! Work and education are there to make life better, not worse.



Anyway, i guess i feel like i want change... and its coming soon. Once i graduate my life will change... and i want it, but at the same time it scares me. But i want to start working...  i want things to be different, i want to have a goal in my life because right now i feel like i dont have any goals... not even in my training. I have small races to run, but they are nothing big just 5 or 10km races and that isnt that big of a deal to me. Even if i am excited for all of them and can't wait... i guess i want a challenge? Something new..... I want something new and different in life.

I guess i need to just be patient because things will change. But also to sit down and write down my goals in life... what is it i want to do? What do i want to achieve? What are my goals? What are things i want to happen.... i believe in the power of thoughts and knowing what you want in life. If you know what you want, things will eventually happen even if they dont turn out like you had thought they would.

Just some random thoughts in my head.... at the moment i feel like curling into a ball. Its been a tough week so i guess its ok to feel like this - but tomorrow is a new day and will hopefully be better than today because today has been a pretty 'blahhhh' day. :(



Trying to smile anyway, even if i feel pretty down at the moment.
Not to mention all the negative feelings i am having about myself and my body at the moment.
But this place is supposed to be POSITIVE and so no need to talk about that!!! :)

18 comments:

  1. You seem to feel bad about your vidt often... Hope you fight these thoughts

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    1. It's just normal /hormonal feelings :) :) stress = bad body image but it's nothing I react upon, I know they are just feelings.

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  2. Are you a camera, because every time I look at you I smile <3 <3 (trying to cheer you up :p )

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  3. Really good post, I can definitely relate, I am always looking to make goals.
    I recently made a goals board, and put it on my wall, Its really great to look at everyday to remind yourself of what you want. hope you feel better xo

    www.libertylifeandselfhelp.com

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    1. Goal boards are great. They can definitely be a motivation!! I hope you have a great week!

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  4. Hello!
    Don´t worry about the future, you are so young and your whole life ahead. And plenty of time to discover what you really want to do. Just focus on graduating and after that focus on relaxing and being on vacation :)
    What if you would set a challenging goal for yourself, like the Stockholm marathon?
    Feel better!

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    1. Didin´t mean to push you to make this commitment to train to a marathon.
      I just know about myself that if I have a challenge and a goal to work on I also have it easier to focus on obligatory things that needs to be done. It´s like I´m more motivated to get all not so nice things done so that I can get to work on reaching my goal :)

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    2. Thank you, you are very right. At the moment its about graduating and the rest will fall into place! But i need ssome form of small goals... i dont know if i have the strength or endurance to run a marathon, for now im happy just being able to run a half marathon!! But never say never, i might make that a goal sometime!!

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  5. Awww, Izzy! <3 You are such a beautiful woman and you've achieved so much and gotten through so many challenges, more than many people do in a lifetime! You're going into a new chapter and you don't need to rush into anything. Some people take a gap year to figure out what they really want to do. It took me three years after graduation before I ended up in the career where I needed to be but it wasn't the career I ever imagined I'd end up in, life takes you on so many turns but it's like you say, you really will end up where you are meant to be. I'm right there with you having a blah day. It will pass. Stay strong <3

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  6. why your body? Are you feeling alright?

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    Replies
    1. Yeah its just stress and when I feel a little tired I can feel this way. But it's nothing I react upon :)

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  7. Had been strangely feeling the same way lately, but I think it is just because something so much bigger is waiting around the corner aka after graduation and in comparison our daily routines seem... aimless ? The future is a blur and it makes it hard to feel like we know what we're doing, but actually we're just messing with our own head, thinking we're not doing enough. Try a day hanging out with new people, discovering a new shop, finding a new perfume/lotion/shampoo, new music. Get extra rest. You only realise later how exams drain you out. Hope you the best, xoxo - Carine.

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    1. Exactly!! Thank you so much!!! You are very right about the exams... they are very draining.

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  8. Thinking of you lots and lots, and hoping that you feel less sad real soon. You're so beautiful inside and out and you don't deserve to be feeling so negative. I'm sending you positive vibes and lots of hugs to make you feel better! Take lots and lots of care Xxx

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much sweetie!! <3

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  9. Izzy,

    I found this blog about an English girl with mental health problems. I like her writing and it makes me tearful. Maybe you'll find some inspiration from her posts too :')

    https://mentalillnesstalk.wordpress.com/

    J (long time no comment!)

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