Life without Anorexia
My motto is 'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'
I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.
I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.
I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.
I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at: email@example.com
Monday, March 9, 2015
So many thoughts
At the moment I have so many thoughts in my head I feel like I need to write them out.
First off, today I have felt really sad for some reason. Too many thoughts i guess. I've kept telling myself to think positive. Be happy but I haven't been able to do that, not so far anyway. My thoughts have controlled my emotions. First off its my friends, it feels like as soon as I got a boyfriend my friends have stopped inviting me to things like brunches, meeting in town, dinners etc it's not that I don't want to or that I have said I can't. It's just that I haven't been invited because they presume I will be with A. This makes me super sad.... I am not the type of friend who will just ignore my friends because I have a boyfriend, it's more the other way around. :( so when I found out about the brunches they have planned and the game nights and dinners I have missed it made me feel so lonely. I am sure it's nothing personal and they just thought I would be with A and yes I was, but if I am invited somewhere and I want to go, then I will go.
Then I am also feeling very overwhelmed and unecsivive about autumn and after graduation. I have been set on studying nutrition and then taking courses about exercise so that I can then help people find balance and health in their life. But I am feeling so overwhelmed with work and the course I want to go and the 1 year preparation year I have to go will be lots and lots of work. But then I'm thinking. .... do I really want to spend the rest of my life trying to teach others about health and balance? It feels like so many people don't want to listen, they don't want to change. They argue everything they are told and it gets exhausting.... just trying to help people and it takes alot of energy. But then I also love helping people. Helping people with their health and finding balance. It makes me happy knowing that i can make a difference because people are so unknown.... living with false information and oblivious to health. and balance.
This is something I'm thinking about at the moment,how long will I blog? It feels like I'm getting far too much critique and I'm giving too much energy, draining me of energy instead of being something that gives me energy. I do put pressure on myself to really try to help everyone but it's not easy. Getting so many emails all the time and I really want to help you all. But at the same time I am not a doctor, a therapist or qualified. Blogging is neither a job or something I get paid for. It is something I do to try to help others, but a diagnosis as well as professional help is needed and that is what I suggest 100% of the time. To go to a doctor, to get help and support. There is only so much I can do.
Alot of thoughts, things I need to think about, consider. Find my motivation for school, work, my future, blogging.