Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Monday, March 9, 2015

Helping a friend who has an eating disorder

Recently i have gotten quite alot of emails regarding people who know someone or who have a friend who is showing traits of an eating disorder or actually has an eating disorder. If you are struggling yourself this can be very triggering as you feel you want to help your friend or family member but as you yourself are struggling it can be triggering.  My first advice when it comes to a sitation like this is to Thnink of yourself first. And remember that your health comes first. I know this can be hard and it can feel like you are selfish, but if you feel triggered by someone or that it becomes some sort of internal competition with that person. Then you need to think of yourself first and maybe distances yourself from that person.
  But also to remember that If you cant help yourself, then you cant help others. One of the first rules i have for myself when it comes to blogging is that if i dont feel well mentally, then i dont reply to emails or blog so much because i cant help others if i am struggling myself. But also i dont give out advice which i wouldnt follow myself.... I dont want to be hypocritical, so the advice i give out is the advice i believe in and advice i would follow myself if i was in the same situation. So remember this, that you have to be able to help yourself before you can help others. 

It is hard to give advice about this topic though because what helps someone is very different. For some people all they need is someone to show them support and love and show them that there is someone there for them. For others what they need is someone to sit them down and make them eat, show them and talk about the consequences. What you can think about is what would have helped you....  When you were struggling and in the same situation what would you have wanted to do for you? I know when you are struggling and sick you would prefer for everyone to leave you alone so that you can just listen to your ED and not be disturbed or do things that scare you. But deep down you know that you would have liked someone to step in and help you, to make you eat or to just show you some support and love for recovery. Or someone to be an inspiration and support for you. So try to do that for the person you know who is struggling. 

You can also check out my page about helping someone who has an eating disorder.


I would suggest trying to talk to the person and show them support FOR RECOVERY. Not to trigger them or that it becomes some sort of competition. Becoming friends with other people who have eating disorders when you yourself have one doesnt have to be a bad thing, however if you find that it hinders your recovery then its not a good idea. But i think that if you can help someone else, if you can reach out and be a support to someone who is also struggling then its just good. I mean that is what i am doing with my blog. It doesnt trigger me to help others... i get many emails and comments each day and get pictures and things sent to me or hear about how little someone is eating or how much they are exercising but that doesnt trigger me, just like numbers dont trigger me. Instead i use my past experience and my knowledge now to try to help others, but like i mentioned in the beginning. If i am struggling myself due to stress or have alot going on in my life, then i choose to not answer emails as i cant help others if i cant help myself.

This may not be the most helpful post, but think about what would have helped you? What would you have wanted? Forcing someone to eat isnt always a good idea, but sometimes just mentioning that you know what they are doing or that you have been in the same situation or that if they want to talk about it that you are there to help them.

It can also help to suggest treatment for your friend as being a therapist to them is not always the best idea. Just like you shoudlnt try to act like their parent or force them to eat, instead you can be helpful and supportive to help them eat normally and not over exercise/self harm/purge/binge if they struggle with those things.

THIS page can also be helpful

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