Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Monday, January 5, 2015

Some habits you need to get rid

There are a few habits which, dont necessarily have to mean you are sick, and they all depend on alot of different things. But if you find yourself doing alot of these things and you cant give yourself an honest and truthful answer as to why, or that your answer has got to do with fear of weight gain and anxiety over food or just a bad habit you have always done. Then think about changing them.

Always leaving food on your plate. There are 2 types of people, one who says to finish everything on your plate no matter what. And the other who says you should always leave something on your plate.... i think you shoulld finish what is on your plate, unless it is that you really are too full. But when you are sick you can develop a sort of habit to always leave soemthing on your plate even if you want to eat it, and then it is no longer something you do because you are full, but because you feel you have to.

Drink x glasses of water before, during and after a meal. There are people who suggest you do this and sure, it can be a great way to get your water intake in. But those who are sick can drink lots of water to try to fill yourself up, when in actuality your body needs food and more energy. You arent thirsty, you are hungry. And from what i have heard drinking lots of cold water while eating can just make it harder and longer for the food to digest. Its better to just drink something while eating and then drink a little afterwards, if you are still hungry then eat MORE, dont just drink water.

Doing x amount of sit ups or squats during the day or before going to bed. I can tell you that doing this really isnt going to achieve much apart from resistance training and maybe getting stronger legs or core... but if you do too much and never let the muscles rest then you will just break down the muscles anyway. But also that sort of compulsive exercise isnt good... i dont believe in any of those 30 day sit up or plank challenges because it forces you to exercise even though you may not want to. I think if someone wants to start exercising its better to find the motivation and workout x times per week and not just a few squats or sit ups here and there. Because really... is that enjoyment? Are you enjoying forcing yourself to do 100 squats?
 Nothing will happen if you dont do those squats or sit ups or what it is you might do. Let your body rest.

Saying you have already eaten or arent hungry whenever food is offered to you. Of course, there may be times that these statements are true, i mean i have had to say ive already eaten when i already have and someone offers me food and i know that i cant fit it into my stomach. But if you constantly say no to food offered to you and you havent already eaten or you are hungry but dont want to eat what is offered to you. Then try to change this behaviour. Think....what is that cookie, or apple or latte or granola bar going to do to me? It is going to fill you with energy so that your body has energy to function properly. It will give your brain energy so you can think better, it will feed your organs and muscles. Will it make you fat? No..... everyone would be fat if they were to just eat a cookie or granola bar or a banana in the middle of the day then. But thats not how weight gain works. So if you want something when its offered, eat it.

Getting rid of the dressing on salad, wiping away oil on your plate or getting rid of butter/cream on food. No. No. No...... This does not and never will equal a healthy mind. You should feel no obligation to wipe away oil that is on food or to panic when your salad has dressing. An option which i do is that when i order salads i get the dressing on the side and pour it over myself because i dont like mayonnaise or mayonnaise sauces, so then if its a non mayonnaise dressing/sauce then i pour it over. But you should NOT panic because you see butter/cream/oil in the food. Its food, its energy, everyone else can eat it and SO CAN YOU. So if you have the habit of doing this with food, then make an effort to stop. But also.... if you ever eat with others this becomes extremely awkward when you sit there and have to begin scraping at your food and dabbing and wiping.

These are just a few of the habits and things which i myself used to do during my half recovered stage and i thought i was healthy because 'i was still eating'. But there is so much more to it than that. I might try to do a part 2 of this when i get a chance.
But i hope that this makes you think about your own behaviour and what you might need to change. You might do some of these things subconsciously because they are just habits, but please make a conscious effort to change them. For yourself and for your life!!!

This photo always makes me laugh because right when the photo was taken i sat there trying to 'crumble' the pastry and by the my plate was just filled with a huge pile of crumbles which my mum forced me to eat anyway!!!


  1. This was a brilliant post Izzy, and I can really relate to it as well..I know myself, I had alot of silly habits which I practiced on a daily basis which I didn't really think twice about, because I told myself they were normal and I was eating. So in my head, it was completely fine to just pick at food, cut it into tiny portions and eat really slowly on purpose, always go for the smallest biscuit/potato, etc. Thinking about it now, I realise there alot of them which I did back then, and some of which I still do now! It's so hard to snap out of the habits , especially when you have been doing them almost unconsciously for so long! I'd love to see part 2 of this post Izzy :) xxx

  2. Hi Izzy :)
    This post is very helpful and informative, which is great for me because i love reading all your advice.

    Something that crossed my mind as i was reading the post though was that a lot of people who are considered ''normal'', ''healthy'' or don't have eating disorders also do these habits. In particular, i was referring this to the habit of always leaving a bit of food on your plate and the one about doing an amount of squats and sit-ups in the day. I was thinking that 'habits' like these could possibly be ,more of a lifestyle choice than a 'bad habit' because some people choose to leave some food on their plate because it is just what they decide to do at the meal or they do this because they were brought up by their parents/carers to do so , and i read everywhere that loads of celebrities and even my friends and family do x amount of squats or sit-ups in the day because they've made it part of their lifestyle to exercise in this way.

    Haha, this is a bit confusing, but it got me thinking that actually, a lot of people i know do these habits here that you have described as habits we should get rid of as recovering from an eating disorder. But the people i know who do these habits are not diagnosed with an eating disorder and do not have one... so what i'm trying to say is how do we break these habits, if we see ''healthy'' people around us doing the same things?

    1. Actually, a majority of people (studies have mentioned anywhere from 50-80% of the population) engage in disordered eating. It isn't an eating disorder and it isn't going to be super harmful to their health like an eating disorder, but it's actually not intuitive eating. It's letting calories, number of sit-ups, etc run how you eat and exercise instead of letting your body eat what it wants and exercise in a healthy way for YOUR body.

      One thing that I have realized over time is that my body is not someone else's body. What someone else does may not be good for me (sometimes, it may not even be good for them, but that is their choice).

      It's fine for others to do those types of behaviors (it is a behavior, just as it is a behavior to listen to your body when you are eating), but I personally want a life better than that. I want to be able to listen to my body and not rely on sit-ups or leaving food on my plate.

    2. Hello :) (i'm the anonymous person who asked the original question!)

      Thank you very much for your reply to my question and i agree with that you have said :)

      I am not surprised to read that 50-80% of the population engage in disordered eating but don't necessarily have a full blown eating disorder and when i wrote my original question that is what i was thinking : that many people do engage in eating disorder behaviors but might not actually have a full blown, health-damaging eating disorder.

      Thanks again for your reply :)

    3. What Dayna answered is pretty much the same i would write :) She was just quicker to answer which is great :)
      I have written a post talking about how being in recovery is not the same as being reocvered or healthy.... because yes, there are people who skip eating sauce or dont eat any carbohydrates or do 100 sit ups each evening and dont have an eating disorder. But thats because an eating disorder is a mental illness and things can go to the extreme... for some people doing 100 sit ups is something they just do for a few weeks, but when you have an eating disorder those 100 sit ups can turn into 500 sit ups and 500 squats each evening and it becomes a ritual you cant break. But uyes, normal people can have weird behaviours because its something they are taught from others or from media, even if the habits arent that healthy if you actually look at it from that point.

  3. Hey izzy this was really intense resting but at the beginning you said there were habits that might be good to eat. Could you may be do a post on how to know the difference between a good and bad habit? For example ince I started eating I made sure to have my five a day which I would consider to be a good habit and would like to continue.