Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Monday, January 19, 2015

Healthy set point

Something which i thought i would bring up this morning is about your bodies healthy set point. Your body naturally has a healthy weight, a weight where it is comfortable, safe and healthy at. Some people need a higher weight to function at, others a little lower. It is very individual.
   When you have an eating disorder, its so easy to just focus on the number. You decide you want to weigh a certain number, and thats the number you are going to be at. But it doesnt work that way. Just because you want to weigh X kilo, doesnt mean your body is going to be happy there. That you are going to have energy, be happy, be eating enough to actually sustain that weight.
   Your body will fight you, your body wants to survive, be happy. If your body is at a too low weight or not getting enough food, it will begin shutting down the less important things in your body, i.e if your a female you'll stop menstruating. Your metabolism slows down, you grow more hair on your body to keep you warm, while you lose hair on your head as you dont have enough nutrients.

Its not YOU who decides where your body is healthy at. Its not just pick the lowest number. What does the number on the scale really matter? Its only you who sees it. It just tells you your mass - bones, muscles, water, organs etc Its like your height, it gives you your length, that doesnt make you panic because you grw a few mm's, it doesnt make you happy because you lost a few mm's... infact the opposite, it makes you sad most probably.
   Stop thinking in numbers. Instead, focus on being happy and healthy.

I know its easy to get caught up on a number, I did as well. My goal weight was 58-60kg, and i weighed 54-55kg, and i basically said i cant and i wont gain anymore weight. I didnt want to reach my goal weight, i was scared. I kept telling myself i was healthy when i weighed around 55kg, but i wasnt!!! I still had my ED thoughts, still had some fear foods, often felt sad and depressed and still had my fat feelings coming back. I was on a balancing scale... it was so easy to tip over the edge, relapse and lose weight again, which i did begin doing. I was scared of taking the leap and letting myself reach my goal weight.... see how i felt then. I was just so focused on the number. I didnt want to weigh more.

But i took that leap of faith. I let my body take care of itsself. I began listening to my body, eating when i was hungry, no calore counting. Exercising and resting. I let go of the number on the scale and then when i reached 58-60kg, thats where my body was happy at. I went up and down 2kg, which is natural for the body, and i stayed that weight for almost a year until i began fiocusing more on strength training, which then resulted in my gaining muscle mass and weight.... so now i weigh around 65kg. And i know numbers can be triggering, so im sorry about that. But i just want to show that you shouldnt be scared of the number on the scale, im open and saying that i weigh 65kg.... a number i never even thought possible... My lowest weight was-40kg, and in recovery i said i refused to ever weigh more than 50kg.... my highest weight before i got an ED was around 50-53kg, and it scared me to have to weigh more than that.
  But you know what, i was almost 5 years older, alot taller as well.. of course i had to weigh more than i did before my ED began.

Numbers like on the scale dont matter to me, and they shouldnt matter to you either. You have to take care of your body, listen to your body. Not try to control it!!!

 Read this text below, and try to remember it!!

hey guess what…..even if you’re at a “normal” bmi….you might need to ask yourself….”can i maintain this weight without any disordered behavior?” 
if the answer is no….that’s not your body’s set point..!! and you will function 8 million times better once you let your body settle where it feels most comfortable. it is okay to gain weight.


  1. OmG, thank you soooooo much for this post! You're absolutely right! I've set myself a number I wanted to be at too but it definitely didn't make me happy. Now, with almost 10 kilos more I feel much better - but I still have a way to go to be at a healthy weight and I'm fighting every single day...

  2. Hey Izzy! I`d like to ask if you`d have any advice how to deal with a friend or someone, who has definitely and most sure stopped at "half stage" in recovery? It seems like the person doesn`t even realize it or she just doesnt want ot go further in recovery: has very low body weight and no body fat at all after having anorexia, also having weird and strick rules about her diet etc.. Do you have any tips how to deal with that friend? How could I get her at least realize, that she is not healthy and person can recover totally from anorexia and that very underweight body is not good and healthy at all :/

  3. I totally agree. When I was living at home where there was a scale I would weigh myself every day and had a weight I wanted to get down to. Although that weight was never good enough. But I am now living in a place without a scale and am so much better. There's no way for me to focus on the numbers and instead I listen to my body and can look in the mirror and actually like where I'm at.