Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Thursday, December 18, 2014

Winterwonderlan running

Today i decided to face a fear of mine, which is falling, and to go out running in the snow.I can pretty much count the number of times ive run in the snow on one hand (i think), because i have always been too scared to do it. I have a HUGE fear of falling which is why i dont go ice skating and walk the speed of a turtle when its icy outside because im so scared of it.
  But it looked so beautiful outside and i just wanted to move my body so i thought ill give it a go... no expectations or pressure. But just to run and see how it goes and hopefully not fall! Though it would be a bit of CBT training for me if i did fall.

With good music in my ears and the proper clothing (picture below) i ran for 14,5km! Longer than i had thought or expected, infact the distance felt like nothing. Half way through though i began to get a bit of pain in my hip (genetic problem) and i felt the start of a blister happening. So had to stop for a little while, stretch a little, take out my insoles (as they were causing friction on the bottom of my foot) and then i kept going!

Its funny how even when im running im thinking... i never want to stop, i just want to keep going. Though of course i do have to stop sometime... but i mean i love it. And when im running im thinking about my next run, just wishing i could run everyday! 

I can tell you from my own experience that when you begin running because you truly enjoy it and you fuel your body properly and let it recover and rest then running will be so much more fun than when you force yourself out to run to compensate or because of compulsion. When you wake up with motivation to run and its not just Oh no... i have to run today. Then you will feel energized and happy after your run. You will fuel yourself properly and let yourself rest so that you can enjoy the next run you do aswell! :)

Now its time for food. food. food. and study!!

How to dress to run in winter:
Layers & preferable a dry fit top/pants. A light jacket .- so you dont freeze but dont boil either.
A hat or headband.
Leg warmers.
Good shoes - preferably ones with grip.
Running socks.


  1. You are a freak... I moved myself indoors to my gym's treadmill when it went below zero. Though I do have had asthma as a kid, so it might make it a bit more of a struggle to breath in the freeze. I actually like the readmill as there are no uphills (because setting goals is just too risky!) and I can easily quit whenever I want to, if I want to. I do know that you, however, don't really care for treadmills. I'm just simply too attached to comfort (and speed: layering brings excess carriage) that the struggles of running in cold and on snow just won't attract! I admire your courage on this.

    1. Ignore that "if I want to", because it's sort of obvious that running in other moments, too, such as sleeping, makes everything quite challenging.. + Readmill? I want to try that!

    2. hahahha :) I love feeling myself move forward and seeing different scenery, it gets so boring on the treadmill. Though i love doing intervals and HIIT on the treadmill when i can change the speed and incline myself :)
      We're all different, so its good that there is the option of outside running or a treadmill!!!

  2. Im glad you enjoyed your run! :) I should be known for falling on ice...Even when I'm holding someones hand I tend to fall, haha!! i know its scary, and this probably won't take away the fear, but really nothing bad happens, it just hurts a bit if its ice you fall on. But since its happened to me so many times I'm not as scared of it as I used to be but still careful, of course ;)

    1. Ohh, thats bad luck :) I used to fall quite alot before when i was ice skating and such and hated it... but it was after my ED that this fear is even stronger. :/ But like you say, i know its nothing scary or bad. But i think because im so tall as well it feels worse? Or so thats what ive read anyway - why tall people can be more scared of heights and such!