Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Monday, November 3, 2014

There is no such thing as a perfect body

I am often told via social media that i have the perfect body and you would think that would make me smile. But not really... because what is a perfect body? Who can define what a perfect body is?There is no perfect body.
  Everyone is different some people are short, some tall, some skinny, some curvy, some have blonde hair, some have black hair. Who is to say that one is better than the other?
  What counts is your personality, your behaviour, your actions. Not whether you have skinny arms or a flat stomach.

What i am aware of though is that my body fits into the sort of ideal body at the moment. This is not something i have chosen. I have chosen to exercise because i love it... not because i want to look like someone else or have the 'ideal body'. An ideal body for me is having a functioning body filled with energy which is exactly what i have at the moment. So my body is an ideal body for me :)

But also my body, my diet, my exercise, my lifestyle... its all healthy for me!!!

On Instagram (IG) there are so many fitspo accounts and its so easy to find yourself scrolling through your feed and seeing all these healthy dishes that people eat or seeing other people working out or seeing their bodies. And i know, i am part of that and posting pictures like that. But at the same time i believe i am quite honest.... i dont say i never eat chocolate because the truth is i eat it 3-5 times a week. I dont do excessive amounts of cardio and i dont restrict. I also am honest with showing that i bloat... im not some photoshopped person who walks around with visible abs all the time. If im honest those types of pictures is just due to good lighting and some flexing. But otherwise yes, i have stomach rolls when i sit, yes i have stretch marks and cellulite on my legs. Im not a robot, im a human being.
   I look the way i do and i dont plan on changing that. But i got asked whether i only love my body because i look the way i do and no... thats not why. I love how my body works, i love having energy. Not because i have more 'muscle' or am 'lean'. What matters to me is energy, happiness and self love.
   How would i feel if i gained 10kg.. well i dont think i would feel like myself because i have always been tall and skinny, would i hate myself? Well i cant answer that. But i am pretty sure i would try to focus on loving myself, but i am a healthy weight and BMI so i am pretty sure i would try to get back to this healthy weight if i were to gain loads of weight. This is my healthy set point and the body weight which my body is healthy at.

What i really dont want to do is hype people about looking a certain way, so i try to avoid posting too many workout pictures or body pictures of me. I feel that on this blog it would be too triggering for people in recovery. Especially as you are at such a vulnerable stage and so susceptable things and you dont need to see bodyphotos everyday.
    So i DO RECOMMEND if you follow any fitspo IG or Tumblr and you are in recovery and compare yourself to others, do think about deleting them. You dont need any negative things around you or people triggering you.

Focusing on resting, on eating enough. Fighting the voice in your head, not trying to be someone else or look like someone else.


  1. I know when most people talk about EDs they use the words "suffer from this illness" and it's somewhat annoyed me because having been sick with anorexia feels more like my fault and my bad choices, it's a hole I dug for myself. So I can't think of it as an illness, an illness is something you had no control over, so when people go on about how strong you are and how much better you are for getting through it, I can't view it as such. I might've been so much better if I just didn't make bad decisions. So it's sort of hard for me to stop feeling guilty about it and to stop thinking of everything I ruined because of it and move on. Did you ever feel like this?

    1. Ive answered this in a post coming up today :)

  2. You do have the perfect body, but so does everyone else. Every body is perfect just how it is. I hope you're doing well 💕

    1. Very true :) Everybody is perfect! Even underweight and overweight, but having a healthy body is also important!