I've done the same thing, if you look at posts from 2010-2012 there is alot of that negativity. Calling myself fat, ugly, horrible, better off dead etc etc but you have to realise that those thoughts aren't real. And voicing them - letting your ED control you so much that you talk so negatively about yourself just makes you feel worse.
But think those thoughts anyway. Challenge and fight your negative thoughts. Don't let the negative words and thoughts control you. Change the weak to strong (for recovery. You ARENT being strong for choosing your ED), change lazt to being strong for resting, change fat to perfect just the way (you are. No matter what your weight or body size), ugly to perfect (just the way you are).