Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Monday, November 10, 2014

Recovery, fat/weight gain & exercise

Since posting the pictures of me in my sports bra, my inbox has overflown with messages of how i got my body to look the way it does... how i got my stomach so toned. But also so many people telling me that they abuse exercise trying to shape their body and keep from gaining fat. Gaining fat seems to be the worst thing possible for so many people. All they want is their flat stomach and abs.

Lets begin with 1) I am ME. I look the way i do due to genetics, having CF and what i eat how i exercise. You could do the exact same thing as me, but you still wouldnt look like me.

2) I am a healthy weight, a healthy body size, a healthy BMI and have a healthy mind.

3) I began exercising - with short walks - when i was 2-3kg away from my goal weight. I did get into some bad exercise habits after a while as i didnt know how to workout and wasnt really listening to my body so began over doing it with cardio and eventually burnt out. Then i changed my ways and in the beginning of this year i began strength training and focusing on that. But you can read my exercise journey HERE & HERE and how i built up strength

The first thing to remember is that your body NEEDS fat. It is essential... you cant go your whole life scared of fat. You need to face those fears. Ask yourself EXACTLY what is it about having fat on your body or gaining fat that is so scary?
   Everyone has fat on their body and without it, you feel cold, your body grows extra hair, you feel tired as all energy goes to trying to keep you warm.
  I also get alot of people telling me they strengt train just so that they dont gain fat and this is WRONG. You should strength train to get stronger and because you enjoy it... not just so that you dont gain fat. But also, its extremely hard to just gain muscle without gaining fat. It doesnt work that way... and when you dont eat enough and just strength train and do lots of cardio, you break down your muscles and you dont get stronger you just get weaker.
Post: Why i strength train & gaining weight while strength training

To combat your fear of fat and fat phobia here are some posts that can help you:

People are more scared of having fat than dying
Fat is not a feeling
Fat phobia
How to get past the fat feelings

You need to realise that exercising and trying to change your body WILL NOT bring you happiness, it WONT fix your bad body image issues. Instead, you need to face whats in your head:
Fixing your attitude instead of your flaws (post) Dont focus on what you need to change on your body, focus on changing whats in your head.

If you struggle with over exercising HERE is a master post of posts whcih can help you.
HERE is a replacement method for exercise in recovery (Coping with no exercise)

And here are some posts which ive written my thoughts about abs and my body which seem to have gotten alot of readers and likes.
My thoughts: Abs
Genetics or hard work

I know this post was just a bunch of links to other posts but instead of writing everuything out again (because as you can see ive already written so much about these topics, i thought reading the older posts might help you!).
You need to realise that
 1) Your body NEEDS fat.
2) Having fat on your body doesnt make you ugly/lazy/unpretty or any other things. It makes you YOU and healthy.
 3) You need to fix your attitude and thoughts towards your body instead of fixing your body.
 4) Dont compare yourself to others.
5) Exercise because you enjoy it not because you want to change your body. If you dont like exercise, thats fine. Then dont :)

1 comment:

  1. My motto is at the moment: my belly is just another womanly curve ;)
    It is so, so hard to stop comparing yourself to other people. It feels at the moment as if the whole world is exercising and focusing on weight loss which I find very offputting. My family are all very active and I would always be out walking every day. Now that I can't it's awful as I feel so lazy and inactive in comparism with everyone else.
    I genuinely love to walk and I am so looking forward to getting better and being able to walk when I want again...but when I do recover I am determined to be sensible about it. I remember very well getting panic attacks because I had walked 10 minutes less than I usually did on a certain day..or going out in lashing rain and winds to walk when all I really wanted to do was stay inside in my pjs! And I know that I damaged my feet doing so much long hard walking and I really want to make sure I am never let my relationship with exercise become abusive and damaging ever again. xxxx