Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Thursday, October 30, 2014

The dangers of half recovery

If you want to read about my half recovery you can read HERE or HERE or read my whole recovery HERE

However what i want to bring attention is the awful half recovery... the stage where you might have some normal habits such as being able to eatn 60% of most foods, you are close to or at your goal weight. You might be back to school or work.... you might even look or behave healthy but you still have alot of ED behaviour or thoughts.
    Its this stage where ALOT of people get stuck at....they think that they are healthy. They spend 90% of their time convincing themselves that they are healthy.

Even i did it.

Iwas restricting during the day, i was scared of carbs, i still hadnt eaten chocolate or crisps. I binged and purged in the evenings. I still self harmed at times. There was a voice in my head telling me i was fat and that if i were to gain the 3-5kg i needed then i would look enormous. That voice in my head told me i was healthy, i was normal but i was also too fat. I didnt need anymore food, i didnt need carbohydrates.I didnt need rest. But i was still healthy....

Though i was FAR from healthy. Though i thought i was because i was going to school i was able to eat lunch in school though a small lunch and i ate barely anything or nothing before school because i was restricting for later when i would binge in the evenings.

DONT get stuck in this viscious circle. Dont get stuck in half recovery when you think you arent sick enough for help, you arent sick enough for hospital or treatment because either you can eat something... or your a normal weight or not too underweight.
  But the fact that you think you arent sick enough is a sign that you arent healthy. Because healthy people dont wish to be sick or to be in treatment.

Also remember that eating disorders are in the head... you could be a normal weight or you could be able to eat most types of food. But if you still have ED thoughts in your head then you arent healthy. When you are at this stage its usually you who has to realise that you cant stay there.... your parents, doctors and friends might treat you like you are healthy. But you have to realise that if you have thoughts of starving yourself, compensating for eating, you feel guilty for eating, you skip food, you have fear foods, you dont allow yourself to rest etc etc
  none of those things are healthy and means that you ARENT healthy. No matter what your ED tries to convince you.

Realise that there is MORE TO LIFE and DONT stay in this half recovery, grey zone. TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR LIFE.

3 comments:

  1. This is so helpful. Half recovery is where I am now. I only just released because I had pretty much convinced myself that I was 'recovered' and as you say in your post, other people treat you as recovered too. It is scary to admit that I am still a little unwell, but this gave me the insight and the motivation I needed. You are really so amazing and make the whole thing seem a whole less scary. Thank you Izzy xx

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  2. You are amazing Izzy. Thank you for being so open in your blog and for being so selfless in your help for other people. You make recovery a much brighter thing :) <3

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