Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

I am a generally happy girl who loves running, going to the gym and eating food!! Though my life has been very different.
I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia & purging tendencies & over exercising. I was depressed and self harmed. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
After alot of struggles, lots of ups and downs, suicide attempts, tears, anxiety, panic and never thinking i would be healthy.
I am now declared healthy from anorexia nervosia.

I have been blogging for 4 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I am happy and healthy and living my life. Going to school, meeting friends and trying to find myself in this world.

I write about my daily life, but also try to write posts about how it was when i was sick, advice and tips.
I am open and friendly, so dont be scared about writing a post or sending me an email at:


Monday, September 22, 2014


This evening i got tagged on IG on a photo of me from when i was sick and underweight on some pro ana account. The comments below the picture were a mixture of
This is horrible, eat a cheese burger. 
This is disgusting, needs more weight.
Why would anyone want to look like this, disgusting


My goal body. 
Perfect body.
Need to look like this now.

The problems with having a blog and posting pictures like i do is having the pictures stolen.. its not the first times its happened. Many of my photos have been used in articles about anorexia, on pro ana sites and ive even had somene create a fake FB account using my photos, and other accounts have been started with my pictures used.
   All very discomforting knowing that can happen.

However this photo was posted 20 weeks ago or something, and had gotten many likes, something which dumbfounded me. Made me feel a little sick. I then went onto one of the proana/thinspo tags on IG and scrolling through the pictures, it just made me feel sick. Pressing on random pictures and reading the comments.... so many comments I want this. I need this. This is my goal weight. Im so fat, need to stop eating. Someone give me tips to stop eating. I need to lose weight. I need to look like this.
  All the pictures were of very underweight girls... merely skin and bones. It has been so many years since i have ever looked like that or wanted to look like that.. infact, i was never really someone to look at Pro ana. I had a stage where i looked at anorexia movies, infact i would spend hours each night looking at them. Hating myself that little bit more.
   But over the years ive just forgotten about Pro ana, its never been something i think about.

So then to randomly find myself on one of those tags, it didnt trigger me at all. No longing to be skinny or to lose weight, infact just pure happiness that i took myself out of that Hell. That i was strong enough to eat, to fuel my body, to fight my demons and to recover. To now live a happy life where my pictures arent black and white, my body isnt covered in scars and i dont need to fake a smile. But life is colouful (most days) and most days i have a smile on my face.
Pro ana is something i am 150% against.. the fact that people want to be sick. Want to have an eating disorder. A living nightmare.
  Infact, i dont think people who want an ED even know what its like to be sick... though maybe they already have an ED, but have the feeling that they arent sick enough. But reading in description things like Want to have an ED. My goal weight is Xkg. my calorie goal is x. Havent eaten in x days.

Its like... Are you proud over yourself? Do you feel better than everyone else? Do you want an award or something because you haven't eaten? Because you are slowly killing yourself.. because thats what it is.
   You ARENT better than everyone else for not eating or for only eating salad. You ARENT better than everyone else because you weigh less or are skinniest. That doesnt make you better than anyone else, it doesnt make you smarter, prettier and definitely not happier.

Eating disorders are not something people should want. Its not something people should joke about. Its not something people should encourage.
There should be 200% focus on getting rid of that negative bullshit, of actually helping people with eating disorders instead of sending them home telling them they arent sick enough. Or having wannabe anorexics encourage each other to starve themselves.
You need to take care of yourselves... focus on your recovery and health. I HIGHLY suggest you avoid those types of sites... HELL, if my blog triggers you in anyway because say i write about exercise or food ot anything else, dont read. I write my blog to help, not to trigger. And i definitely dont want to hinder or prohibt anyones recovery. But at the same time the way i write and what i write works for me.
   But know that some things in your life you need to get rid of... and if you follow any pro ana sites or accounts on IG (because i know there are many of them... and some of those girls who claim they are in recovery really arent and they get under your skin...delete them).

Focus on inspiration and motivation! Infact, just go report any pro ana sites you see on any type of social media sites. Get rid of those types of things, they are NOT needed in this society. And pictures of underweight people should NOT be an inspiration for people.


  1. Reading this made me feel so angry Izzy, I cant believe that some people out there would do this. It is sickening to think that some people actually desire to be sick, actually want to go through the hell of an ED...what is so glamourous about having protruding ribs, or being so hungry you can't sleep, or regurgitating every single little bit of food which you allow yourself to swallow? Eating disorders are horrible, horrible things and they should NEVER be promoted or admired in any way. I am totally with you on this Izzy - pro ana should be something we should ALL fight against. I remember being called by a stranger "pretty skinny b***" and it was so triggering at the time...but I know for certainty that there is absolutely NOTHING beautiful in skinniness and being a walking skeleton. Pro ana does nothing but promote suffering, pain, hurt, and death in some way too - anorexia can be fatal as we all know. So we all need to focus right now on eradicating it completely.

  2. The fucking world needs to read this! PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND ANOREXIA DOES NOT MAKE YOU ANY BETTER AT ALL. It makes you sick and damned miserable and is not something you should ever wish to have. Fuck pro and anorexia wannabes. They have no idea what they are getting themselves into. Why doesn't the works understand skinnier doesnt makeyou better? !