Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Comparison with siblings

Comparing yourself with others in general is common when you are sick or in recovery. However its even easier to begin comparing yourself with your siblings as they are so close to you and you see them everyday. But also that you might eat meals with them.
 
It might be your brother who only eats junk food yet is still as skinny as a stick, or it might be your sister who eats a lot less than you, or has decided to go on a diet.

Its easy to look at what others are eating and compare it to yourself, wonder why your sister only eats 2 potatoes when you have to eat 5 or why you have to eat 6 times per day and the rest of your family only eats 3 times per day.
 I did this all the time. I compared what i ate to my sister all the time, and her way of eating triggered me alot. She ate very little (she is the type of person who can forget to eat or be so busy that she doesnt have time to eat, or skips breakfast ebcause shes not hungry. So now im teaching her to bring snacks with her and to try to eat every 2-4 hours and she says she is feeling alot better and likes that im teaching her about nutrition and reminding her that she needs to eat breakfast even if shes not super hungry.). Also my sister was going to the gym several times a week while i was a day patient, and that alone triggered me. But then when she came home and ate little for dinner and i had to eat more than her and i had basically eaten double the amount she would eat in a day and i still had 1 more meal to go.

But this type of comparing doesnt work, it doesnt help matters either... just because your sister eats little doesnt mean that you have to as well.
  What is so good with eating little? I prefer being able to eat loads and not have to worry about calories or how much i eat, but eating what my body needs. I much rather eat 3000kcal a day because thats what my body needs than eat 1200 because everyone else is.
 Also, if you need to gain weight you do need to eat alot. Its as simple as that. Trying to cheat and eat less wont help you.
   You cant change how others eat or what they choose to eat, you can only change the way you react to it. Whether it triggers you or not.
  Because it DOESNT have to trigger you.


Recently my sister has realised that she cant really eat gluten and that she might be gluten intolerant, so while we were in the summer cottage my sister didnt eat any bread, pasta or the pancakes which i made for the buffet. And at first i got this weird feeling in my stomach, Why was she not eating bread? Should i not eat bread then?
  But then suddenly i realise, we are 2 different people. Just because she isnt eating bread or pancakes doesnt mean that i shouldnt, and so i enjoyed my egg sandwiches and my pancakes. She might not eat those thiungs anymore, but that shouldnt stop me from eating them. We have different bodies, different goals and if i like bread, im still going to eat it.

So you DONT have to let those things trigger you, change your thoughts around it. So it realisticly. There will always be someone on a diet and someone eeating less than you,. But that shouldnt make you feel bad or make you want to restrict, find a way to cope with those thoughts.

And then theres comparing of size... remember that even if you are siblings you can be different in size... like my sister and I, we arent similiar at all. Or i mean, you can see some type of resemblance, but in general... we look quite different.
   Dont compare yourself to your sister or brother, that way your body shape is or the way your healthy body looks is the way it looks. You cant change that... not if you want to be healthy anyway. Comparing of size isnt a good thing, it doesnt bring you any good.
  Focus on yourself and your goals!



3 comments:

  1. I actually really liked this post. I don't have any siblings, but often find myself comparing my situation with those of other girls and even my parents. Like a girl at work today kept saying how hungry she was, but didnt want to eat a wrap as it was 'too big' so had a little piece of toast for lunch. Meanwhile I had a big wrap filled with smoked salmon, avocado and cream chees, and had already had a big breakfast and snack. But I'm trying to turn it around and tell myself that I'm lucky I can eat so much. Is your sister older or younger than you?

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  2. I would always compare myself to my cousins. And my sisters would always compare themselves to me, 'cause I'm smaller than them. But that's not good. It's better to focus on yourself and your goals, because everyone's different even if you're related. I'm trying to get my family to understand that we should all just love and accept our bodies. Comparing yourself to others will only make things worse. Now I think my sisters are starting to feel more comfortable in their bodies and it makes me so happy.
    Olivia

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  3. Thank you so much for this, Izzy!

    My parents keep telling me how lucky I am that I can eat so much while they (apparently) gain weight just by indulging just a little. -_- Sometimes it's still triggering when they declare themselves very full after eating only a third or half of what I eat...

    But we are different people. I know my mom snacks late at night when I am already asleep, and I know her colleagues love any excuse to bring in cake and pizza. My dad also snacks while cooking and randomly through the day. That's just what they prefer. Me? I like structured, sit-down meals and snacks. Plus, I'm a distance runner, so I need the extra calories. In the end, we are just eating for our own lifestyles.

    -Scarlett

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