Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Wednesday, May 14, 2014

My tattoos!

Something which ive been thinking i should write about/wanting to write about is my tattoos, and yesterday i got some questions which i thought i would answer :)

what do your friends think that you have tattos? do you ever regret your tattos? what do they mean? do you want new ones?

What do my friends think? I dont think they think so much about them, haha. My first few weeks in the school i go to, i got loads of questions about my 'Just Breathe' tattoo. Everyone was surprised when it was real... i thought it was quite funny, i mean, did i really write just breathe on the back of my neck everyday`? hahah
   Everyone thought it was really nice and got loads of compliments about it. 
I got my first tattoo when i was 16, and i had planned it for a while. I had told my parents i was getting it, but my mum told me i shouldnt and my sister kept telling me i would regret it. But i knew what i wantd, so when i travelled to Ireland i told my dad i was getting one ,and he knew a good place and went with me!! (I love how supportive he is, he also has a tattoo so he didnt mind!)
  What does my tattoo mean? Well Just Breathe is the slogan for Cystic Fibrosis, but it also reminds me to just breathe. To keep going, that even when its tough. As long as i breathe, i have life and can keep going. It goes hand in hand with my depression and suicide attempts, that i still have breath and am still alive. But it also has meaning with like exercising and running. How important it is to breathe, especially during running!! So many different meanings :)
   Ive had my tattoo for several years now and because its on the back of my neck i actually forget its there and can almost be shocked when people remind me i have one or i see it. But i still love it!!! :) I definitely dont regret it and dont think i ever will, its a part of me .Its a part of who i am!





And then my Freedom tattoo (gotten last year i think?) so havent even had it for a whole year O_O Its crazy, it feels like ive always had my Freedom tattoo. Infact i find it weird to see photos where i dont have it... its definitely a part of me.
  And you know what, i still look in the mirror and just smile when i see my tattoo!!!It means alot to me, its a reminder of my past and even my future! And its sooo pretty, just the way i want it.
  Because lets be honest, when you plan to get a tattoo, you are worried of the outcome. What happens if it doesnt turn out right? With my first tattoo i was 100% confident with it, but with my other one, i was actually only 80% confident... i had planned it, i knew what i wanted. But i wasnt sure if i was going to wait or not, but on the day i just decided i would do it.
  Once again, i was in Ireland and i went to the same tattoo parlour, this time with my friend. I had told my mum that i was going to get a tattoo, but of course she told me no that i wasnt allowed. She still likes to bring up the fact that i didnt have permission to get my first tattoo.
 But i think like this, I dont need permission. Its my body. If i want a tattoo ill get one, and if i regret it. Well thats my choice, thats my own burden. 
  My mum wasnt super happy when i came back from Ireland with another tattoo, shes almost worried to let me travel to Ireland now ;) hahah
  





Its not so hard to guess what my Freedom tattoo means, but its about my past. Everything ive been through, and how im free. Living my life. But also, I dont like rules or being controlled. Thats the worst thing i know. Having limits or being confined. Im like a free spirit, sort of. Put me in a box, and i will sure as hell fight to get out of it. I am not someone who likes to follow rules, and am the rule breaker, i do things my own way!!! Freedom is so important to me. I dont like people deciding over or for me.

What do my friends think of my Freedom tattoo, they like it. Were a little surprised when they first saw it, as i hadnt uploaded a picture or told anyone i was getting it. But just like me, they see it everyday and dont really say so much.
  Of course, they dont know the whole meaning behind my tattoo, they just think im a rule breaker... a bit of cliche almost, hahah.

Am i planning on getting new tattoos? Not that i think so. I dont want to have loads of little spread out tattoos, i think thats ugly. If i were tog et one, i would have loads of thought behind it and it would have alot of meaning, just like my other ones.
 Though i must admit, i am tempted to get a new one... just for the thrill out of. The buzzing sound when you sit there, the excitment and adrenaline. And that happiness when you see your new tattoo. And my friend recently got a new tattoo, and i must say...im jealous!! haha, but it will just be fake tattoos if i get new ones!!!




DO you have tattoos? Do you want ones? What are your opinions on tattoos? :) 
If you have any more questions, you can just ask!

4 comments:

  1. Your tattoos are amazing!! Really beautiful and flawless!
    I have 2 tattoos too, 3 little stars on the back os my right shoulder and the word "Pai" on my right foot (it means "Dad" in portuguese :) )

    Izzy, I'm struggling... I've been so so hungry the past weeks, and I havent been really motivated to work out, and it's a shame cause I had seen so many good results in my body (I am looking stronger and muscular), but the last few days all I want to do is eat and today I woke up with my alarm at 6AM to workout, i ate my oatmeal which was delicious, put on my gym clothes and then... I didn't want to go!! seemed like my body was begging me to stay home and rest until mit was time to get ready to work, and then I felt hungry again and managed to eat a banana and like 400g of pineapple. Then I remembered I had a quest bar left and ate that too... afterwards I was feeling okay but felt the urge to workout to compensate for it... but it was too late cause it was already time to take a shower to come to work... I've been sleeping less than I should and maybe that's the reason I dont have much energy... but I also noticed some weight gain that I hope is water weight since I've been eating a lot more than my usual.... I'm confused and kind og guilty. But I thought I was listening to my body....
    also I've had 3 cups of coffee already which I think is making me even more anxious.... I wanna cry but I cannot do it here at work. okay I'll just calm down.... I just needed to talk about it... and you're my inspiration. It'll be okay, right????

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    1. Oh I forgot to tell I also ate like 2 spoonfuls of PB with the banana... I'm a mess.

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    2. Hello, i think you could be so hungry because you arent sleeping enough. Whenever i dont sleep enough i can end up eating more. Its good that youa re listening to your body adn eating more, your body needs energy. You shouldnt feel guilty for it.

      What you should think about is, are you stressed/anxious/tired`? Those are all reasons that can make you feel very hungry.
      Or it could be that you have been over exercising`? I know you workout alot, and it can be that you have just burnt out. Your body WANTS food and nutrients, it doesnt want to workout. It wants rest and fuel. And you dont feel motivated to exercise... (you can look up the symptoms of over exercising?)
      I suggest you take a rest week, just do some light walking or yoga or something if you feel you want to exercise, but nothing too much. And also let yourself SLEEPand REST, and also EAT ENOUGH!! Its important. This rest week with food can help you feel more motivated, give you more energy again.

      Dont feel guilty or sad, take care of your body and mental health!!! Dont push yourself if you dont want to. You'll be fine, dont step on the scale at the moment, you dont need to know your weight. Just think about yourn physical and mental health!

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  2. Thank you for taking time to read and answer to me... thank you so much, it means a lot to read those words from someone who knows what I'm feeling.
    I actually took 2 days off in a row, and you know, it felt good. I'm trying not to be anxious and rest more. And I think my body actually nedded it, cause these last 2 nights I slept like 7-8 hours straight without even waking up at the middle of the night to go to the bathroom.. and it NEVER happens (I drink loads of water so I always have to pee 2 or 3 times every night) hahaha!
    Today I'm feeling a little better,,,
    I guess it has to do with the fact that I stopped counting calories 3 weeks ago! I forgot to mention that... I decided to give "intuituve eating" a go... Well I still have a lot of fear foods to overcopme, but those past weeks I have been eating my "safe foods" (and fortunately there's a lot of them :) ), but I'm not counting or measuring the portions. So at first I was all "screw macros, I'm eating one more questbar", or 'Yes I just had lunch but I'm still hungry so I'll eat one more almond butter&jam sandwich"... you know, like all the time I spent counting I was kind of restricting so now my body wants to do the opposite (not to mention that I've been eating lotssss of peanut butter and almond butter.... But I should be more careful... I don't want to gain a lot of weight from it...)

    ABout the exercising, I was probably overdoing it... but is that I really really want to build muscle and see the changes in my body and I feel that if I dont workout hard enough, it wont make a difference... and I would be wasting time... I don't know...But I'll try to start over slowly!

    Anyway, thank you again.. I'll copy your words to my cellphone "notes".. and read them when I feel anxious...
    I really like your blog and love your food pics cause they inspire my snacks!

    Have a great weekend!!!

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