Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Friday, November 9, 2012

Healthy eating means balance and moderation.

When you think of healthy eating... do you think of just eating salads? fruit and vegetables? maybe some protein?

Do you know what healthy eating is?  It is balance and moderation.
  Really, you can eat whatever you want... in moderation. As long as you have a balanced diet.
   And a balanced diet consists of carbohydrates, protein, fat, vegetables, dairy.
  That is what your body needs. And then of course, depending on your lifestyle, some people need more than other of one nutriet, but you still cant skip one of those factors.
If you skip carbohydrates, as so many do, as they think they will lose weight. Do you know what will happen?
  You will crave carbohydrates, in the form of bread, pasta, bakeries... and do you know what that can lead to? A binge... and yes, binging can lead to weight gain...
  SO you know what the answer to that is? Is to have carbohydrates in your diet.
  To maybe have a sandwich in the morning. Or to atleast have some form of carbohydrate for lunch and dinner. It can stop the cravings!!   Carbohydrates arent bad. You wont suddenly gain loads of weight because you eat carbohydrates.
  Of course, in a large quantity, you can... but its not just that, there is other factors aswell. Like how much you exercise, what else you eat etc.
And fat... that is a huge fear when you have an ED. You get rid of all fat, as you think it is dangerous... you know what.. there is good fats.
  Eating sugar all the time, no, that isnt healthy. Not for anyone... there is no point lying about that.
  But fat... that is healthy. Your body needs fat.

Avocados, salmon, nuts, olive oil, dakr chocolate... those are heatlhy!! I would like to think of myself as a bit of a healthy fat addict!
  I eat either avocado, nuts or dark chcoolate everyday... sometimes i eat all 3. And there is nothing wrong with that.
  And just liek carbs... if you cut fat out of your diet... it will have consequences. In the form of craving cheese... and those cravings can be, chocolate, cheese, bread, butter, eating loads at dinner/lunch etc.
  So its best to have some fat in your diet?

And of course, protein, dairy and fruit and veegtables are important in your diet!!! If you dont eat protein, you can lose muscles.

And then lets get to the sweet stuff... the chocolate, sweets, crisps, pasteries.
  I am not going to lie, and tell you that they are healthy and you need them in your diet. Because the truth is, you dont. Which im sure, you might already know.
  But you know what... its not dangerous to eat them.
Its ok to get cravings for milk chocolate, and eat a bar of chocolate... there is nothing wrong with that.
  Its ok that on a friday night you want some popcorn or crisps. Its ok to eat a bafg of sweets because you need a sugar kick.
  So dont ever feel guilty about that. Let yourself enjoy food.
  There is no point sticking to just healthy food... i mean, what is the fun of on a friday night, where the rest of your family are sitting with a bowl of crisps shared between them and your sitting their without something  because crisps are 'unhealthy.'
  In a small quantity. No they're not. I mean, you dont have to eat them everyday .So why not let yourself enjoy them here and there!! They wont kill you (unless your deathly allergic.. then i guess, stay away from theem :) )
I am someone who has a healthy diet. I eat whatever i fancy. Whenever i crave it!! :)
  I dont hold back :)
 I eat 5-6 meals a day. And snacks range from oatmeal with milk and cinnamon to a bag of sweets or pancakes with jam and peanut butter. And so many other alternatives!!
   I do, like to look into 'healthy' alternatives of certain foods. But i dont have a problem eating 'normal' food.
  As you might have realised, sometimes i bake and i make 'healthy' pancakes. or 'healthy' cinnamon buns... but i can eat normal ones aswell.
   So dont misinterrperet that.

Somedays i eat more, somedays i eat less. Some weeks i eat really  healthy, wehre i just eat a protein salad for lunch. Or eat less carbs for dinner. The next day ill be eating loads of sandwiches, or eating a bag of sweets for a snack.
At first my mum got worried when somedays i didnt take as much pasta for dinner, or just ate sandwiches for lunch... but she then realised. That somedays im not as hungry. Or maybe i eat less for dinner one day, but an hour later, ill be having a huge night snack.
   I dont have a problem saying i want chocolate. I dont feel guilty if i eat 2.....or 3... of my homemade buns. There is nothing wrong with that.
  My body is very healthy... and i can eat as much as i want, or as little i want, without it really having any affect on my body.
  Trust me, ive noticed... one week when i was really stressed, and had stopped eating so much, while i was sick and underweight .I would have lost 1kg or more. But the same. And you know what... that feels good. And also, some weeks. I will eat like a pig, where i might eeat chocoalte everyday, or something and i wont gain anyway.
  So my body is keeping me at this weight, and it feels so good! That i dont have to worry as much that ill lose wieght or gain wieght.
   Of course, i cant stop eating just ebcause i might not lose wieght fast.. eventually if i cut down too much, my body will begin to lose weight.

Healthy, is eating normally. What your body craves. Dont deny it chocolate if that is what it is craving.
   Dont be afraid to take extra if you are hungry at dinner. Your body wont suddenly gain loads of weight, just because....
   Its over a period of time, whether you eat less or eat more that your body will start to react.
Healthy is moderation and balance.


  1. wise words from a wise woman!!

  2. I love this post. It raises so many good points. I know i've heard it before (mainly from doctors ;) ) but hearing it from someone who's been there and can say its ok somehow is much more comforting. Really inspirational. Thank you. xxx

    1. Naaw thank you :) And im glad ive helped!! :)

  3. Its so inspirational to read this from a recovered anorexic. I cant currently see myself ever being able to feel normal about food again which makes me feel sad about the future, but you write so well and so positively. thank you

    1. One day you will be healthy. Have a healthy realationship with food. You've got to want it. You've got to work to make it happen!! Lots of luck. Keep strong !

    2. I know exactly what you mean, Anon! To me, being to even look at food in a different way is like some unreachable dream that I will never have. I want to strive to reach this goal, but, from the way that things are right now, being "alright" with food is the best it's gonna get. Some days I cry about this. When people ask me why I'm so down and sad, I don't even really know how to express my sorrow. I'm just crying because of the fact that I have this situation to deal, and I feel both mentally and physically STUCK. We just have to push on. Maybe we actually can do this? ;)

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  5. Hello there! I just found your blog, and, let me tell you, this post was sooooo encouraging. I've been struggling with anorexia for around a year, with full symptoms mostly occuring on and off throughout 2012-2013. In reality, my relationship with food was probably first severed much earlier than that. I've been though a lot even though I'm just a teen, having been through so many sickening family deaths and illnesses, but I think this ongoing battle with anorexia is by far the most challenging thing I've ever faced and probably ever will face.
    Do you ever read something that you agree/identify with so much that you starting nodding your head and smiling whilst reading it? That was THIS post, for me.

    Just starting recovery, I know I have a long, rocky road ahead, but through prayer, family, and the power of the Lord I can make it through!

    There is nothing that hasn't gone through his hands first, for everything happens for a reason! ;)

    1. I am sorry to hear that you have been through to so much. And i am really hoping that things will start getting better for you.
      Hahah, im glad that im the one who wrote this post :) heh heh
      I know you will be able to recover. Its hard (im not going to lie) but i know that you are strong enough to recover. Never give up.

      :) And like you wrote, everything happens for a reason. And when you recover you will be alot stronger than you ever were, and you will be able to share your story. Or just know that you've been through hell and back!

      Good luck

  6. I am also recovered from ED and it's weird how people like us can sometimes have a more moderate view than the rest of society! I've worked in offices with people who skip meals, and one person even congratulated me for walking slightly further than usual to get a sandwich (the place I was going did better sandwiches) because I would burn off more calories that way so it would be like I didn't eat lunch at all!

    Absolutely it's about balance, but I think the absolute most important part is that it's about NOT THINKING ABOUT IT! The words some people use when they talk about chocolate or sweets - "oh go on then, I'll be naughty", or "I'll treat myself" - if people didn't talk about (and think about) food that way they'd find it easier to have a stable weight, I think. I've found that since recovery I don't notice when or how often I'm eating biscuits and so on. I just eat whatever my body tells me to and whenever my body tells me too. The whole idea of fat being bad or chocolate being a special treat seems bizarre to me now.

    I must say I ended up here on a Google search after being upset by the Wii Fit a boyfriend bought me (I wanted to get more exercise because my job takes all hours) and it only lets you set targets on your weight rather than how fit you are...that bothered me as it's obviously totally unsuitable for me now, I'm not quite 'there' yet that I can think about my weight in terms of 'targets'! It just shows how it's become such a cultural obsession, as has the whole fear of carbs and fats thing.