Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Here today, gonna tomorrow

During my morning walk with my dog i realised that i really do want to get declared healthy.Not for my sake.. or yes, i suppose.. but the fact is. I dont really give a f*ck about being declared healthy.. i feel healthy, i feel fine in my body. and in my head... sort of, most days. But basically... havng a doctor write on apiece of paper that im declared healthy.. its not gonna change anything, its not gonna make the thoughts go away, its not gonna make me like body... its not making any dfference, not in my life anyway... but for my familys life.  
  They dont understand what its like to have a eating disorder, they dont understand the thoughts, the fear, the anxiety, the guilt.... everything. 
  They think its as simple as eat & like your body...It isnt though, nobody would be sick if it was that easy.
But i know it matters to them if i get declared healthy or not... me, i dont care.

Like i dnt think some doctor, who hasnt seen me in almost a year, can just tell me... not even face to face, that i amnt healthy until i've reached this certain weight... i think its bullshit.   
  i know how i feel... and i know im no gonna like my body at 58.. i liked it when i was like 53/54.... so why cant i be that weight? i felt good then.. much better then now?
  But no....

And thinking over it... whats it gonna make a difference..  if it makes my family happy.. i mean, i dont exactly like how i look now, so why not just try it, test and see if i like how i look when im 58kg?
  Scary.. but whatever.

I feel my motivation has come back a little.. to really try my best to gain weight.. i.e eat more.


We'll see... :)


2 comments:

  1. is your sis younger or older she has nice body

    ReplyDelete
  2. How tall are you love?

    ReplyDelete