Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

Translate

Sunday, August 28, 2011

I belong.

For so long....

Its felt like i havent belonged.

I havent wanted to live....  sure, somedays i want to die.  But thats when im tired, its never anything real.

But before, i was so certain i wanted to die, i even tried a few times.. but never succeeded.
   I never felt i belonged, i felt unloved, unwanted, forgotten about.

I hated Mando, i hated being at home, i didnt want to be at school.

I didnt know where i belonged, where i should be, so i had decided that i shouldnt be at all.


But Today, i feel i belong.
   I like being at home (Of course it gets boring somedays, and somedays i threaten to leave/run away. But thats mainly cus i get frustrated.)
Ok, i hate Mando, thats not going to change, but its not the worst place to be, maybe the second worse... Hahaha. But i mean, for now... im not there too often, so its ok to be there a few hours, now and again, sit there and read a book or whatever... at the end of the day though, i would prefer to sit and read somewhere else though!!! haha
Ok school... well the one im in at the moment, isnt a favourite, but i mean... maybe another school will be better... where i wont mind staying a bit later to study, or whatever...
   you know... where i wont mind going.
At the moment, i hate getting up for school... but its not the worst place.


I feel i have soemwhere to be.

I have my own personal space at home, which im taking to my advantage. - Closing the door, loud music and being on my own... which does seem very anti - social.  :D

Living, isnt the worst thing as it once seemed... :)

You jsut got to get through the rough bits to see the sunshine... :)


 

2 comments:

  1. Sorry this is going to be a really bad comment haha, i really want to get to bed now, but I just wanted to let you know-good news! I got into the flute quartet I auditioned for today!!! :):):):):)

    I would say more, but I'm really tired right now and want sleep :) Hope things are well :)

    And I love the picture in this post, it's really good. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow!! Thats really amazing!! You must be so happy! :)

    What does it mean now? I mean that you got in? Will you playing in concerts or anything?

    Haha - sounds weird - but I'm happy for you!!:)

    ReplyDelete