Life without Anorexia

My motto is
'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.
And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email:


Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Nothings decided yet.

So far, nothings decided.
  no one really knows anything, im still in the unknown.

Not until tomorrow, when mum has the meeting with the doctor.

Until then... nothings decided.
But i think, they're thinking..

its time to move on.

I think its pretty much decided, that i have to go to some other clinic. That Mando have done all thye can, but for now, they cant do  anymore for me.
   But they said, that i can seek to come back.. but i dont think i'd want to.
 Im being kicked out.... but thats not necessarily a bad thing.

A change might be good.

But i have so many questions - Whats the other clinics like? whats their treatments like? whats the staff like? the other patients? the food? 
   i dont even know where these other places are?

But i think... that if i get to go home... then i could make it work:)... maybe only maybe.

But i wont be allowed home. :(

Today is going so slow... and tomorrow is Wednesday... which means - a week in HDV - in patient. SUCK SUCK SUCK.
  it also means - a weight gain of like 0,5 - 1kg. :O

Ugh, its like i can feel the wieght. on my hips, my stomach, my tummy... everywhere. its the horrible, hanging fat. i hate it.
  but im tryin to jsut look aside, try to not let my weight get me down. theres no point dwelling on it. in the end, the only way i can get healthy is to gain weight.
   but i seriously dont want to gain anymore.

This week has gone soooo slow. its been a whole week since ive been home. :( been in my own bed. :(
  but if im still here in a weeks time, then ive been here in two weeks, which would mean... that i can start getting time out.. maybe.
   but i dont even have  a case manager yet... so i dont think ill be here in a weeks time.

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